


what the puck?

by wonwoo420



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Sports, M/M, ok its ice hockey im sorry thats not popular, rated m for sex drugs and alcohol and basically the college experience
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2018-05-27 04:15:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 62,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6269308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonwoo420/pseuds/wonwoo420
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Freshman Chan joins the ice hockey team at his university and gets a lot more than he bargained for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "Mom, this isn't high school anymore"

**Author's Note:**

> ok yeah this is uni sports au  
> but with ice hockey bc its the only sport i know  
> like if i knew how to play soccer or something i would have used that
> 
> rn its rated m because i have adult themed chapters planned  
> but like this chapter is like T
> 
> @oldestcomputer: "please give me an honorable mingsol mention in the authors note"  
> im doing it for u buddy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Freshman Chan joins the ice hockey team at his university and gets a lot more than he bargained for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok yeah this is uni sports au  
> but with ice hockey bc its the only sport i know  
> like if i knew how to play soccer or something i would have used that  
> rn its rated m because i have adult themed chapters planned  
> but like this chapter is like T  
> @oldestcomputer: "please give me an honorable mingsol mention in the authors note"  
> im doing it for u buddy

Chan had been pretty nervous about his first practice with the college team. Sure, he was a college student now too, but his mom told him over and over that a lot of guys would be a lot bigger than him and that he might get hurt. He tried to tell his mom that it would be fine, just as high school had been. He escaped his old team with just a dislocated knee during his sophomore year and a broken finger his senior year, with a many bumps and bruises along the way. Chan’s mother was probably right to worry as much as she did.

Chan learned that the team at his new university carpooled to their practices, which was a good way to meet the players he thought. But he didn't think it was as fun as it originally sounded when he ended up being squished in a small car with guys who names he learned were Seungkwan, Vernon, Minghao, and a guy named Soonyoung who owned the surprisingly small car. The three guys Soonyoung picked up with Chan were all sophomores, and Soonyoung was a senior, which is why he had the car.

Chan could tell Seungkwan and Vernon were pretty close, the majority of their conversations were filled with insults rather than any real content. Minghao, the one who got the privilege of riding shotgun to avoid the horror that was the situation in the backseat, was pretty quiet. Chan thought that was kinda cool. The whole mysterious thing. Minghao also had no problem taking small jabs at Soonyoung whenever he said anything particularly weird, which evidently, was quite often.

Chan thought the ice rink had to be 100 miles away with how it felt riding in the cramped car. Soonyoung didn’t have a lot of trunk space, so there were hockey sticks shoved in the backseat on either side of the car doors and 2 bags across the laps of those unfortunate enough to sit in the backseat. Soonyoung tried to get the kids to focus on something other than their lack of comfort, so he asked them how their summers were, and how their sophomore years had been treating them so far. Chan discovered that Vernon and Seungkwan were indeed close because they apparently spent some time over the summer together, so they must have been from the same area. Minghao mentioned something about going home to work at his parents’ studio. Chan didn’t know what that meant, but he hoped that the studio taught something cool like karate. (Later, Chan would find out it was actually a dance studio that taught ballet, and Chan still thought that was pretty cool.)

After the long drive, (which Chan would also find out later was only about 20 minutes) the boys arrived at the rink. Chan thought it looked rundown and wasn’t sure that the building was even open. There were a few other cars in the desolate lot, so Chan figured that the rest of the team had already arrived.

Chan noticed that the inside of the rink wasn’t any more impressive than the exterior when Soonyoung led to them to the locker room, already filled with a handful of other guys. They were all engaged in conversations of their own, so Chan just decided to get dressed quietly, while listening to the conversations near him. He learned that the team had apparently graduated a lot of seniors last year and were hurting for new players. One guy complained that they only had 3 defense this year, which meant minimal breaks for them. Chan saw a boy a few people down from him who couldn’t have been any bigger than Chan himself. He was tightening the straps on his goalie pads and Chan wanted to speak up to ask him if he was also a freshman, but the kid had earbuds in which signaled he wasn’t open for conversation. Well, that, and the furrowed eyebrows and perpetual frown that was painted on his face. Chan tried to pick up other names, but all he got was Seungcheol and Wonwoo, two he couldn’t put faces to.

Chan finished dressing first (it was easy to dress fast when you weren’t immersed in conversation), and headed out on the ice to see two guys talking. They were dressed only in sweats, which meant they probably weren’t players, but they also looked too young to be coaches. The one with the baseball hat looked pretty scary. Chan could tell he was pretty muscular even under a hoodie and shin guards. But when he cracked a smile at something the other guy said, Chan thought that he probably couldn’t be that bad. The other guy was pretty slim, dark brown hair falling neatly over his forehead, unlike the goalie, he had a smile that never seemed to leave his face. When Chan stepped onto the ice, the two turned towards him, one calling out, “Hey! You must be the new kid!”

Chan skated up to them, addressing the two, “Yeah, I’m Chan. I emailed Coach Choi about joining the team.”

“Yeah, that’s me. I’m Seungcheol. I run the team. I used to play on it, but I’ve been out of school for a little while so I decided to coach instead, since we lost our old one two years ago. You’re lucky though. You can be the first to meet the new coach, Jisoo. He’s gonna do a lot of skating work with the team,” the muscular one said, which Chan now learned was named Seungcheol, gesturing towards the slim one, who smiled at Chan (he seemed to always smile).

Chan heard the commotion of other guys getting on the ice, and heard one shout, “Coach, do we not have to wear full pads anymore? Why didn't you tell us?”

“Wonwoo, shut the fuck up and respect your new coach,” Seungcheol shouted back.

“Oh shit,” the kid (who was probably Wonwoo) muttered. Chan thought that they probably didn’t have the best relationship.

“C’mon, get over here so we can start practice,” Seungcheol said to the last of the stragglers.

When they were all gathered in a half-moon around Seungcheol, he began, “Okay guys, it’s the first practice of the year and half of you are already pissing me off, so listen up so we can get into the fun stuff as quickly as possible. We have a new player, I think you guys met him already, his name is Chan. We spoke before and he said he’s played his whole life so I hope you guys are okay with getting out-played by a freshman,” Chan was not too happy that this is how he got introduced to the team. Seungcheol pointed directly at him when talking about him, so Chan didn’t think that helped his strategy to blend in. “And we also have a new addition to the coaching staff. I can rightfully say it’s a ‘staff’ now because it’s more than just me. This is Jisoo, he’ll be teaching you guys how to actually skate correctly. He was a figure skater for 10 years before picking up hockey so I can guarantee that he knows more about skating than any of you do.” When Wonwoo chuckled and muttered something to the guy next to him about Jisoo being a figure skater, Seungcheol added, “Wonwoo, you can start the first practice of the season by skating 5 laps if you keep this shit up.” Chan thought that maybe Seungcheol was actually pretty scary and remembered to not get on his bad side.

Seungcheol decided to make the team introduce themselves for Jisoo, if not for Chan, and he was able to learn all their names. Or just hear their names and forget what faces they belonged to within 5 seconds of hearing them. He learned the good-looking guy was named Jeonghan, apparently he was a grad student. The fuck-up kid was obviously Wonwoo—Chan wouldn’t forget—he didn’t bother saying what year he was in. Chan thought the really tall guy was named Mingyu, but wasn’t sure, but he did remember that he was a junior. By this time, Chan forgot the goalie’s name, along with the names of the remaining two players left. He already knew the guys he rode with on the way here. He would listen closely to try to get the rest of the names.

Seungcheol decided to start practice off with a scrimmage, “to assess how bad everyone got over the summer,” Seungcheol explained. He split the teams up himself, Wonwoo and Mingyu(?) would be the defensemen for one team, centered by Minghao, with Vernon and Chan to start off as the wings, and Seungcheol would play the alternate for breaks. The other team was that nice looking grad student as defense with Jisoo as his partner, a guy Chan didn’t know the name of centering, Soonyoung and the other guy's whose name he missed would be wings, Seungkwan would be the alternate for their team, which made Vernon say something about Seungkwan being a benchwarmer even with the lack of players. Seungkwan tried to give him a middle finger in response, but the gesture was lost under his blocky gloves.

One of the kids Chan didn’t catch the name of spoke up to ask, “Who gets Jihoon? We only have one goalie.” (Chan notes: the goalie’s name is Jihoon.)

“He can sit out to stretch, we don’t need him getting hurt. Just flip the nets over, so you have to actually aim,” Seungcheol said. Chan heard Wonwoo mumble something to the Mingyu(?) kid which caused them both to snicker.

And the scrimmage went just as well as a scrimmage could have gone between kids who haven’t played hockey in a while. A lot of bad passes and missed shots. Chan could feel the anger radiate from Seungcheol who had apparently told the guys to try to play summer league, and it was now apparent that most had not. But Chan noticed that Minghao and the other center were pretty incredible. Those two must have been playing for a long time. Chan also learned to move out of the way as quickly as possible when that Mingyu (not ?, but . now after he heard it yelled a lot) kid was taking a shot, because it was incredibly powerful—but not accurate. So Chan had to throw his body out of the way when he lined up for a slap shot, because who knows where the puck was going to go (answer: probably not towards the net). That good-looking kid seemed to spend every moment that he wasn’t easily poke-checking the puck away from Vernon (who was lacking in more than just hockey skills), eyeing Jisoo and trying to make small talk with him. Jihoon had finished stretching in about 3 minutes, so he spent the remainder of the scrimmage trying to shoot pucks at Mingyu. His aim was much better than Mingyu's, weirdly enough. And whenever Seungcheol got on the ice to replace a worn out player—which was quite often as their stamina was pretty shot—Chan was amazed by how skilled he was. He moved easily across the ice, had incredible puck-control (easily evading Jeonghan’s defense work), and had an accurate shot. Chan thought that he must have been playing his whole life. It was a shame he wasn’t on the team; he would probably be a big help this year.

So after they spent a few moments trying to recover their stamina from the game, Seungcheol divided the team up so some of the players who needed more skating work would go with Jisoo, and the others could work on a breakout drill. Vernon and Seungkwan were the first to split off and work with Jisoo, because as it showed, they really needed the extra practice. The Jeonghan guy looked a little sad when he wasn’t chosen to work with Jisoo, but he already had pretty good control on his skates.

And practice went pretty well after that. Chan even got to work with Jisoo a little because his backwards skating really needed improvement. Jisoo seemed like a pretty nice guy. Until he noticed that someone wasn’t listening to him and kept repeating their same mistakes. Heads turned when he was working with Wonwoo and he was yelling at him for not bending his knees enough on the crossovers. Chan had to hold back a chuckle when he noticed Jisoo’s voice rose an octave for every time he had to yell at Wonwoo for not bending his knees around the turns. Overall, Chan liked his first practice with his new team. The guys he didn’t know the names of were pretty nice, the one with the bright smile offered to partner with him for drills even. Chan was only left being kind of scared of Seungcheol, and very scared of Jihoon, who hacked Soonyoung in the back of the calves when he was screening him in the crease. Chan had to remember to never go near Jihoon if he wanted to keep his legs. Even from far away, Jihoon was a menace with his accurate shot, pelting Mingyu with pucks easily.

* * *

 

Chan was happy when practice was finally over. He liked playing, but Seungcheol worked them all pretty hard (Wonwoo, the hardest as he was forced to skate laps for every dumb comment he made). He now learned that he was sitting next to said human disaster, Wonwoo, and across from Jeonghan in the locker room. The two spoke pretty comfortably with each other earlier, so Chan figured they had to be good friends.

After a short while of undressing, Wonwoo addressed the boy across from him to say, “Hey Jeonghan, what’s got you so quiet?” 

Jeonghan looked up, as if he has been caught, “Hm? What is it?”

“What are you so focused on? You're never this quiet after playing” Wonwoo asked, and from the corner of Chan’s eye he could see that Wonwoo had stopped undressing to give Jeonghan his full attention.

“Do you think that the new coach is kinda cute? Like, in a completely aesthetic definition of cute? He’s got a pretty mouth…,” Jeonghan trailed off, fingers tangled in the laces of his skates. Chan fumbled with removing his elbow pads. Is this what these guys usually spoke about in the locker room?

Wonwoo continued, “Jeonghan, let me ask you something: do you fantasize about fucking every straight guy you meet? Or do you just have some sort of kink for the ones who are your superiors?” Chan nearly choked.

“Hey, you heard Seungcheol. He was a figure skater. That’s like, the definition of gay. Anyways,” Jeonghan added, “Straight guys can suck dick. And straight guys can totally let me suck their dicks. Sucking dick isn’t gay.” Chan tried to hide his flustered expression behind his chest protector, which he pretended to struggle with removing.

Wonwoo lowered his voice to barely a whisper, “Dude, you’re gonna end up like Jihoon.”

Free from his chest pads, Chan blurted out, “What’s with Jihoon?” Alerting the two boys that he had been eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Shhhh, keep it down,” Wonwoo said, finger placed comically to his lips. “You might think Jihoon’s listening to music with those earbuds in, but it’s just a ploy so none of us talk to him. He’s a dick like that. But anyways, we all think that Jihoon’s fucking the coach—Seungcheol. Nobody has gathered any proof yet, but we’re like, pretty sure. Like, maybe 85% sure.”

“Well, I’m not gonna end up like Jihoon,” Jeonghan announced. “I just think he’s cute is all. Anyways, Jisoo is the assistant coach. You can totally fuck your assistant coach. Everyone knows that.”

“You’re horrible,” Wonwoo said, turning his attention back to unlacing his skates. Chan went back to focusing on his own, reminding himself to take note of all of the information he just gathered. He wanted to call his mom. Let her know that college hockey was turning out to be a lot different than his high school team. He would leave out the conversations about dick-sucking, of course. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay yeah so that was kinda messy but i tried to just introduce some people and set the stage for more shenanigans to come  
> i hope to do diff members perspectives for diff chapters but the beginning is chans bc we are learning with him  
> sorry for the weird terms  
> just go along with it if u dont know what they are


	2. "Mom, there's this really cool guy on my team"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chan flexes his P.I. skills in trying to learn more about the team.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more hockey shenanigans are here  
> and chan is gonna hold our hands as we all learn about the team together

Since the team was obviously out of shape, Seungcheol decided to plan some off-ice conditioning for the guys so they wouldn’t die in games. If they couldn’t last a 10 minute scrimmage, they surely wouldn't last a full 60 minute game. So here Chan is, 11am on a Saturday morning in the middle of the school’s track. The soccer team was using the field in the middle of the track to practice, and it was a little intimidating. Because the hockey team sure didn’t look it. Seungcheol was there, of course, and Jisoo was standing next to him (it turns out that he was a grad student at the school, so he couldn’t really get out of it either). Vernon and Seungkwan showed up too, and Chan learned from their constant bickering about who spilled something on the carpet last night that they were actually roommates. Minghao also showed up; he was the only one who didn’t look that tired. Jeonghan and Jun (Chan learned his name when Seungcheol addressed him to ask why him and Jeonghan looked hungover. Jun simply stated that it was because they were indeed, hungover.) Soonyoung was also there, laying on a bench next to the track, apparently sleeping. Chan didn’t think 11am was that early, but the rest of the team was proving that it was actually a punishment. Waking up at 11am in high school was sleeping in. Apparently in college, being awake before noon was used to torture students. Seungcheol originally said that he wanted the practice to be at 8am, but 90% of the team straight up said they wouldn’t show (Minghao said he’d come though). The smiley guy was sitting next to Soonyoung, looking chipper as always, even when he was a little sleep deprived. Jihoon strolled onto the field about 5 minutes late when the guys were stretching, but Seungcheol didn’t say anything. Mingyu and Wonwoo appeared to be absent. Chan wasn’t that surprised to see Wonwoo missing if he was being honest. Chan was learning that Mingyu and Wonwoo were akin to partners in crime or something. They were always together, and apparently that didn’t change when they weren’t even there.

“Alright, let’s start by doing a light jog to get warmed up,” Seungcheol announced. The smiley brunet shook Soonyoung awake so he wouldn’t get left behind.

Seungcheol led the group, at a pace that was slightly too fast for most of them to keep up with for longer than a minute. Jisoo was jogging next to Minghao, and the two were able to make light conversation while everyone was dying behind them. Chan was doing an okay job keeping up and following closely. Jeonghan, who was trying to keep up next to Jun near the back of the group, attributed Chan’s stamina to his “youth.” Which Chan thought was weird because Jeonghan was apparently only 4 years older than him. Smiley guy (whose name had still not been said) was going at a pace Soonyoung could keep up with, making conversation with him about some project he was working on. Vernon and Seungkwan were at the end of the group, seeing if the other would trip over something, occasionally pushing each other if one looked like he was getting a lead. Chan didn’t see Jihoon with the group, he wondered if he had lapped them or didn’t even join them (he never joined them).

The jog only lasted about 10 minutes because, not surprisingly, most of the team was dying. So Seungcheol led them back to the track, where Jihoon was sitting on a bench on his phone. Again, Seungcheol didn’t bother to yell at him. Chan thought being the goalie came with a lot of perks (Wonwoo would say something about fucking the coach was the thing that came with the perks). Seungcheol went to where he left his bag by the fence that enclosed the track and pulled out some pucks.

“Okay, we’re gonna work on some starts and stops to train your muscles. This will be really helpful in games, so take the time to do it right,” Seungcheol started. He placed the pucks on the ground, maybe a few feet from each other. Then he showed the team how they would have to do the drill, sprinting from one puck to the next, starting and stopping quickly. He had Minghao go first, hoping he would be a good example for the rest of the guys. Jun went next, and he was still surprisingly agile for being hungover. But as the whole team got their chance to try the drill, the skill quickly decreased with each person who tried. Vernon tripped over a puck and slid across the track, getting nasty road rash on his elbows and knees, causing Seungkwan to laugh at his misfortune. (Seungkwan also fell when he tried the drill.) Soonyoung stated that he couldn’t do well at the drill because he didn’t have the right shoes. Seungcheol then asked why he wore his Vans to practice then. Soonyoung stated matter-of-factly that it was because he didn’t own other shoes. Which caused Seungcheol to sigh and ask why the hell he even bothered mentioning his shoes then. To which Soonyoung explained that _if_ he did have the right shoes, he would be able to do the drill well. Seungcheol just made him run a lap for pissing him off with dumb comments.

When Seungcheol was teaching them how to do another quick drill, Mingyu and Wonwoo rolled in. “Why the hell are you guys late?” Seungcheol shouted at the two.

“We were originally gonna skip, so we went to IHOP for breakfast. And then we felt guilty, so we decided to eat really fast so we could make it to practice,” Mingyu stated. “And I ate so fast I feel like I’m going to die,” he added, placing a hand on his stomach with a pained face.

“Well, I’m glad you decided to show up. You can get warmed up by running 10 laps around the track,” Seungcheol said. Chan swore he heard Wonwoo sob. But the two did as they were told, and tried their best to move with their food babies on board. On what was probably their seventh lap, Wonwoo stopped and told Seungcheol he was gonna puke, and Seungcheol told him that he didn’t care. So Wonwoo went for about another half-lap, before dragging himself towards where the team was gathered doing another drill. Wonwoo would later say that he was going for the trashcan by the bench that they were practicing near, but ended up puking near Jisoo’s feet, who screamed when he thought Wonwoo’s red, strawberry pancake vomit was actually blood.

And since nobody wanted to hang out by the puke (or get in trouble and have to clean it up), Seungcheol told them they could all go home. Chan wasn’t sure he saw Jihoon exercise at all during the whole thing, but the permanent scowl on his face made everyone avoid him anyways. Seungkwan and Vernon started to head back to their dorm with Minghao, who lived in their building evidently. Minghao mentioned that he had some stuff they could put on their injuries for them. Before the boys left the track, Seungkwan shouted back, “Hey Chan, do you wanna grab food with us?”

“Yeah, sure,” Chan shouted back, jogging to catch up with the boys. He wouldn’t admit then that he was excited to be invited to hang out with the older guys, as there was nobody else his age on the team that he could hang out with, but he would admit his excitement to his mom on the phone later that night.

Seungkwan said they should really clean up first, so they all made it to Minghao’s dorm where he found Neosporin and band-aids for the terror twins. Vernon and Seungkwan were sitting on Minghao’s bed, letting him have access to their skinned knees so he could try to clean them as gently as possible. Vernon protested, saying something about wanting to do it himself, but Minghao sternly said that he would do it for him, and Vernon couldn’t even reach to put a band-aid on his own elbow. Chan sat on Minghao’s desk chair, watching the three bicker with each other. Chan learned that apparently the only reason Vernon and Seungkwan were on the hockey team was that they dared each other to join during their freshman year, betting which one would die first. But Chan noticed that the two seemed pretty in-sync with dying at the same time.

When Minghao’s work was done, the four of them finally made it to the dining hall, where Vernon and Seungkwan were still dueling; now the bet was to see who could eat the most food. Chan had to admit the two of them looked pretty ridiculous covered in scrapes and band-aids. Chan used the opportunity to talk to Minghao, while the other two were busy hating each other. 

“So have you played hockey long?” Chan asked Minghao, who was sitting across from him eating a bowl of cereal.

“No. I started my freshman year like Vernon and Seungkwan. I played other sports in the past, so I picked it up pretty fast,” Minghao said in between spoons of cereal.

“Wow, you’re really good though,” Chan said, a little jealous of Minghao’s superhuman athletic skill.

“Next to Vernon and Seungkwan, anyone probably looks really good,” Minghao said, bringing another spoonful of cereal to his mouth. Seungkwan finally started paying attention to yell at Minghao from his spot diagonally across from him at the table. Seungkwan was saying something about not making fun of people who weren’t as athletic as you, because they were trying their best. Minghao just kept eating his cereal, lips curving into a smile. Chan would also tell his mom on the phone later that he thought Minghao was really cool and hoped they would be friends.

Chan decided to use this time to try to gather as much information as possible. Like a secret mission or something. So he started by asking the question he thought was the most important.

“So, what’s up with Jihoon?” Chan asked casually.

“What do you mean?” Seungkwan replied.

“Like, is he always that angry? I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile,” Chan continued. Chan thought he might have seen Jihoon laugh when Wonwoo nearly puked on Jisoo’s shoes, but he wasn’t sure.

“Jihoon isn’t angry, he’s like … just quiet. He’s actually really nice when you get to know him,” Seungkwan explained.

“Yeah, in one of my first games, some guy totally took this cheap shot on me, and when the ref blew the whistle, Jihoon punched the guy in the face. The guy didn’t take off his helmet or anything, so Jihoon ended up denting his face mask. He maybe even broke his knuckles. But I thought it was cool of him to stand up for me,” Vernon said, holding a fry up to his mouth.

“I think Jihoon has the most penalty minutes on our whole team. I think they’re all for fighting,” Minghao said.

“Yeah and I’m the one who ends up serving them all for him!” Seungkwan whined.

Chan had to make a mental note: Jihoon wasn’t angry. Or was he? He sure sounded angry. But nice angry. But Chan had to continue prodding. This was a mission after all.

“So, I heard Wonwoo say that Jihoon and Seungcheol are dating or something. Was he being serious?” Chan continued.

“Oh they’re not dating or anything. Fucking and dating are two different things. But yeah, there’s something between them. It’s pretty obvious when Seungcheol lets Jihoon do whatever the fuck he wants all the time. He’s the only one who never gets yelled at,” Seungkwan explained.

“Seungcheol drives Jihoon to practice and games and stuff, but they’re not dating. And if you wanna live, never bring it up to Jihoon,” Vernon added.

Chan nodded. He would have to remember to avoid Jihoon with just about any question he was interested in. It was safer that way. But Chan remembered another thing that was bothering him since their first practice. “So do you guys know why Wonwoo gets yelled at the most? Did something happen between him and Seungcheol?” Chan asked, pretending he wasn’t dying to know.

“Those two? They’re actually really good friends. They played together when Seungcheol was still on the team two years ago. Seungcheol only picks on him because he knows it won’t break Wonwoo’s spirit,” Seungkwan explained. “And he thinks it makes him look cool to yell at people.”

“Yeah, if he yelled at me like that I’d probably cry,” Vernon added.

Chan makes another note: apparently all the scary people on this team are nice. Maybe all the nice people are scary? Chan would try to further investigate later. He hoped these guys would invite him to hang out again. There was so much he needed to know.

Like that one guy's name. Chan totally forgot to ask when he had the chance. Maybe he would continue the mission for information the next time Soonyoung drove him to practice. He was close with the smiley guy it seemed. If he appeared nice, did that mean he was actually really scary? The thought totally didn't keep Chan awake that night. (It totally did.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyways jihoon is an asshole  
> mingyu and wonwoo are dumb and dumber  
> and this wont be the first time we see jeonghan and jun hungover 
> 
> there is still so much we gotta cover  
> like seokmins fucking name


	3. "Mom--no, I don't call you only when I need things"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junhui and Wonwoo tag-team to embarrass Jeonghan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok now we are gonna watch jeonghan crash n burn in his attempt to be flirty and fun  
> i said i would make chapters with diff peoples perspectives  
> so enjoy jeonghans for now
> 
> anyways...commence the jihan

Jeonghan was pretty relieved that Wonwoo’s vomit was his ticket home. He was tired of Seungcheol making him exercise on a Saturday morning. Especially with a hangover. But he felt pretty bad Jisoo nearly got puked on (no, he really didn’t), so he thought that he should help Jisoo out by offering him a ride home. It wasn’t even his car and it wasn’t even Jeonghan who nearly puked on Jisoo, but Jeonghan wanted to make Jisoo think he was a good person (which he wasn’t).

“Wonwoo!” Jeonghan shouted to his roommate when he was trying to leave the track.

“What?” Wonwoo shouted back.

Jeonghan met up with him and said, “Hey, let’s give Jisoo a ride home.”

“Dude, I’m not helping you with your hard-on for that kid.”

“Please. You know I deserve to have this one thing.”

“Now, what makes you think that?”

“I took Jun out last night so you could have a chance to hang out with Soonyoung. Now I’m hungover and you owe me this.”

Wonwoo released a dramatic sigh. “ _Fiiiine_. Tell the kid I’ll drive him home with us.”

“Thanks, slut,” Jeonghan said gleefully before jogging back over to where Seungcheol and Jisoo were speaking, trying to avoid Wonwoo’s vomit. “Hey, Jisoo,” Jeonghan said with a smile. “Wonwoo feels bad he almost puked on you, so he said he wants to give you a ride home.”

“Oh, I live right down the street. He doesn’t need to do that,” Jisoo replied. “It would probably take less time for me just to walk over there rather than trying to have Wonwoo find the place.”

“Then how about you come over our place and we all eat lunch or something? He feels really bad and wants to make it up to you,” Jeonghan said.

“But I’m really gross from working out.”

“We all are, now come on and join us.”

“Okay sure, that’s really nice of him,” Jisoo said.

“Can I come too?” Seungcheol asked.

“Of course not, loser,” Jeonghan said.

“Just because we played together before doesn’t make me any less of your coach now. You gotta stop treating me like shit. I’m technically your superior,” Seungcheol said.

“You know I love you, but you made me exercise before noon today, so you are uninvited to lunch,” Jeonghan said.

“Fair,” Seungcheol replied with a shrug.

Jisoo told Seungcheol a quick goodbye and headed off the track with Jeonghan, who was giving Wonwoo suggestive eyebrow wiggles when he made eye-contact with him from where he was waiting across the field.

“Jisoo said he’d love to eat lunch with us,” Jeonghan told Wonwoo when he finally reached him.

“Oh, that is just fantastic,” Wonwoo said, sarcasm practically dripping from the words, but Jisoo didn’t seem to notice. The three of them were making their way to the parking lot across campus where Wonwoo left his car when they heard Junhui call for them.

“Hey Wonwoo!” Junhui shouted before jogging to catch up to them. “Can you give me and Soonyoung a ride home? Soonyoung was too tired to drive today and I wasn’t gonna drive for him this hungover. But we’re pretty beat and don’t feel like walking back. Can you help us out?” Junhui asked, using that smile he saved for times when he wanted something.

“We already offered to drive Jisoo,” Jeonghan said, trying to convey with furrowed eyebrows to Junhui not to cockblock his attempt to get to know Jisoo more. “And Wonwoo’s car barely fits two people as it is.”

“Oh come on, that car can totally fit five people. We’ve fit seven before. This will be nothing,” Junhui said. Damn him.

“Yeah, tell Soonyoung to meet us in the parking lot,” Wonwoo added.

“Thanks, you’re a lifesaver,” Junhui smiled. Wonwoo turned to Jeonghan and gave him that cocky, shit-eating grin. Fuck Wonwoo. This was Jeonghan’s time to flirt—not his. He had his chance with Soonyoung last night. It wasn’t Jeonghan’s fault he botched it. Also, he still didn’t ask Wonwoo what even happened. He had to make a note to himself to figure out how exactly Wonwoo ruined his chances this time.

Wonwoo, Jeonghan, and Jisoo reached the car first and they looked it over to wonder how all five of them were gonna squeeze in. It was one of those shitty compact cars you’d thought went extinct in the early 90’s, but Wonwoo was leading the effort to keep them alive here in the twenty-first century.  It was also one of those shitty cars that had only two doors, so it forced the passengers to do that awkward thing of pulling the front seats up so people could squeeze in the back. It was obvious by his choice of vehicle, that Wonwoo hated other people.

When Soonyoung and Junhui caught up to them, Wonwoo said, “Hey Soonyoung, do you want shotgun?”

“Yeah, thanks man,” Soonyoung smiled. Jeonghan was tempted to give Wonwoo one of those gagging gestures but was actually pretty thankful for Wonwoo’s big crush on Soonyoung because it meant he could sit with Jisoo in the backseat. Jeonghan opened the passenger side door for Jisoo to get in first, and when Jeonghan went to follow after him, Junhui took Jeonghan’s opening of the door as an invitation to squeeze in after Jisoo. And Jeonghan wanted to punch him in the face, but that could wait until later (anyways, he would lose that fight for sure. And how embarrassing would it be to get his ass kicked in front of Jisoo?). So Jeonghan just sucked it up and squeezed in behind Junhui, allowing Soonyoung to finally get in once the passenger seat was back in position. Literally, this was the worst car.

And it was fucking cramped. Jeonghan doesn’t remember how they fit seven people in it last season. Well, Jihoon is small and fits on people’s laps easily (especially when that lap belongs to the guy you’re fucking). And Jeonghan was pretty sure Mingyu sat on what little floor space existed behind the front seats. He didn’t like to think much about the bad decisions the team has made in the past years.

“So, we were gonna eat lunch with Jisoo, did you guys also want to come over too?” Wonwoo asked, putting the shit-mobile into reverse to pull out.

“Oo that sounds great. I’m dying after all that exercise,” Soonyoung said from his privileged spot in the passenger seat. Jeonghan wondered why all the guys with small cars never got to ride in the backseat and experience just how small their cars actually were. Small car solidarity, Jeonghan figured.

So once they got to Jeonghan and Wonwoo’s apartment complex, the three in the backseat scrambled to get out of the backseat as fast as they could once Soonyoung was able to get out first and put the front seat up. It was enough to have to be cramped in the backseat, but it was another thing to be cramped in the backseat when they were hot and sweaty from working out fifteen minutes before. And Jeonghan swears Wonwoo still smelled like strawberry vomit.

Thank god Jeonghan and Wonwoo’s apartment was pretty spacious. They got a pretty good deal on the two-bedroom because it was a little far from campus. But it was worth it to not have to share a room with another person. Jeonghan and Wonwoo were best friends, but they had their moments where they wanted to kill each other. Don’t all best friends? Times like this were one of them—why did Wonwoo have to invite Soonyoung and Jun when he was trying to hang out with Jisoo? Those two were good fun, but not the kind of wholesome fun that you would introduce to your parents—or guys you’re trying to get to like you.

Jeonghan and Wonwoo’s kitchen was a pretty decent size—for an apartment kitchen anyways. So they had a little table in there—feigning some sort of newly-wed couple dine-in kitchen vibe, but their guests usually chose to sit on their ugly couch in the living room. It was a horrible floral print loveseat (obviously thrifted). Wonwoo even got a steal—as he calls it—finding their recliner on somebody’s tree lawn. It took both him and Mingyu to lift it onto a longboard and roll in to their apartment last year, but Wonwoo says it was worth it. Everyone who knows the story of it being found on the curb does not sit on it. Jihoon came over to their apartment once. He never came back after he found out the chair he was sitting in was actually garbage. But that’s okay, Jihoon was a no-fun, douchebag anyways. So Jeonghan felt a little bad that Jisoo decided to sit on said garbage. Poor kid didn’t know where that shit’s been. Nobody did really. (Wonwoo and Jeonghan decided not to talk about where their furniture came from anymore—because they both probably wouldn’t use any of it if they knew.)

“We don’t actually have any food,” Wonwoo announced from the kitchen. “I’m not sure why Jeonghan said we were gonna have lunch here.”

“Do you have _anything_ edible?” Junhui asked.

“We have this bag of frozen string beans that expired like a year ago that we use as an ice pack. I’m kind of attached to it now and don’t wanna eat it,” Wonwoo said, looking into their freezer.

“I kinda wanna try the bad string beans,” Soonyoung said quietly from his spot seated on the floor.

“Nobody is eating our ice pack,” Jeonghan said. “Don’t we have something else?” He called from his spot next to Junhui.

“Uhhh—oh, we have a box of cheerio’s,” Wonwoo said looking through the cabinets. Moving to examine the contents of the fridge, he added, “We don’t have any milk though. Not any that’s not expired that is. We also have two eggs. And that’s kinda it for the non-expired food.”

“I’ll eat the cheerio’s,” Jisoo said.

“Good choice,” Wonwoo said. “Will anyone be joining him?”

“Fine, give us the shitty cereal,” Junhui said.

“Not with that attitude,” Wonwoo said.

“I’ll fucking come in there,” Junhui said, pretending to get up.

“Please don’t kick my ass. It isn’t even noon yet,” Wonwoo said.

Jeonghan released a sigh and asked, “Does anyone want a drink? I think I still have some Kahlua.”

“This early?” Jisoo asked.

“Yeah, that’s why we’re drinking Kahlua,” Jeonghan replied, getting up from his seat. “Anyways, I’m still hungover from last night so it’ll help. You want some too, Jun?”

“I don’t think that’s how you’re supposed to get rid of a hangover,” Jisoo said, a little concerned.

“I’ll have some. You still have that weird coffee robot, right?” Soonyoung asked.

“Soonyoung, for the last time it’s called a Keurig,” Jeonghan said.

“Let the man use the coffee robot!” Wonwoo shouted from the kitchen, as he was trying to find enough bowls to put cereal in.

“Yeah, I’ll have the coffee-robot alcohol too,” Junhui said.

“Nobody is gonna get the coffee robot if you all keep doing this,” Jeonghan sighed.

But everyone did end up getting the coffee-robot coffee, and Jeonghan was finally able to talk up Jisoo, holding one mug of coffee and one mug filled with cereal from his spot back on the loveseat.

“So, you’re a grad student here? Did you go here for undergrad? I don’t remember having you in any classes before,” Jeonghan asked him, sipping on his drink.

“Yeah, I’m a grad student here now, but I went to undergrad out of state. It’s my first year here and I think it’s cool you guys have a hockey team,” Jisoo said. “I didn’t get to play for my school in undergrad. I actually met Seungcheol during men’s league over the summer. When I told him I was going to this school, he mentioned that you guys had a team and told me I could help him coach if I wanted. And here I am,” Jisoo smiled.

“Well, we have that scrimmage coming up next week. You’re going, right?” Jeonghan asked.

“Yeah, of course. Seungcheol was talking to me before we left about the possibility of me dressing for it. Since it’s just a practice game, I think I’m allowed to play even though I’m not really on the team officially.”

“Well, I’m glad I’ll have a D partner then,” Jeonghan smiled.

Cue Wonwoo doing one of those fake gagging gestures from the entryway to the kitchen behind Jisoo’s back, so only Jeonghan could see him. Wonwoo was a dick, but a dick with manners. “Don’t you like being my D partner, Jeonghan?” Wonwoo asked, batting his eyelashes dramatically.

“You know I do, but I don’t love alternating between only three D,” Jeonghan said to him.

“Fine, be that way,” Wonwoo scoffed, eating his cereal from a measuring cup. “More time for me and Mingyu to hang out then,” he pouted as he took a seat on the arm of the loveseat between Jeonghan and Jisoo.

“So, how do you like the team so far? I know we aren’t really that impressive or anything,” Jeonghan said, turning his attention back to Jisoo. Now he had to talk around Wonwoo, who so politely sat in between them.

“I think you guys are a lot of fun,” Jisoo said. “I’m starting to get a little worried about how much you guys drink though.”

“Oh, you’ll get used to it. When you suck as bad as we do, you gotta find some way to actually have fun,” Jeonghan said.

“Isn’t playing hockey the thing that’s supposed to be fun?” Jisoo asked.

“Yeah, only if you’re any good at it,” Jeonghan answered, sipping his coffee again.

“Your place seems a little like a frat house,” Jisoo joked, laughing a little.

“We get that a lot. We’re thinking of actually naming it with some Greek letters and everything,” Jeonghan said.

“Well, at least our place beats Soonyoung and Jun’s,” Wonwoo added.

“You only say that because you hate the cat,” Junhui argued.

“I don’t hate the cat! She hates me!” Wonwoo shouted.

“She does not!” Junhui yelled back, Jeonghan getting most of it as he was seated between the two.

“She threw up on my backpack!”

“She’s just shy!”

“She also puked in my shoe!”

“Okay, but you also threw up on Jisoo today,” Soonyoung quietly interrupted.

“Well, I’m just shy,” Wonwoo said mockingly, which made Junhui get up from his spot, threatening to smack him.

“Anyways, it’s not even my cat. I’m watching her for Mingyu until he gets a place off-campus. It’s not my fault she doesn’t like you,” Junhui said, settling back into the couch, sipping on his coffee.

It truly wasn’t a get-together with Junhui and Wonwoo until someone got hit (and that person was always Wonwoo). Jeonghan wished that they could act like regular people while Jisoo was around though. Jeonghan needed him to think that he was a normal person who he could perhaps date at some point, and then most definitely fuck at some point. They could even skip the dating part. But Jeonghan wanted to be a gentleman. (Jeonghan was really good at lying to himself like that.)

“So, you were a figure skater…that’s pretty gay,” Wonwoo said, turning back to Jisoo, almost like he could read Jeonghan’s mind.

“Wonwoo—“Jeonghan yelled.

“No, it’s fine. My mom started me in the program when I was little and I stuck with it because she really thought it was good for me. I started playing hockey in high school though when I was finally able to join a team. I like it a lot more, so I stopped skating a few years ago, but I still make some money teaching little kids the basics,” Jisoo explained calmly.

“So, you gay or what?” Wonwoo asked.

“You don’t have to answer that!” Jeonghan yelled, pushing Wonwoo off the arm of the loveseat and on to the floor, spilling what was left in his measuring cup of cereal.

“You could totally answer it,” Junhui said from his spot still seated on the loveseat, suddenly incredibly interested.

“Jun, why don’t you talk about yourself instead,” Jeonghan smiled. It really wasn’t said like a question, but rather a demand.

“Me? Yeah, I’ve sucked some dick—“Junhui started.

“Not about being gay please,” Jeonghan said, cutting him off.

“Fine, but they’re real good stories. I can tell you later if you’re interested, Jisoo,” Junhui said.

Jeonghan’s dream for Jisoo to think they were all normal people was dead. Wonwoo and Jun were on the assassination team. Hired specifically to kill that dream. And they had a 100% success rate on killing Jeonghan’s dreams. Soonyoung wasn’t hurting—but he also wasn’t helping. Jeonghan would have to remind himself to at least not have Jun over again with Jisoo if he wanted to pretend his life was put together. He could fake it on his own. But with both Wonwoo and Junhui around, it was tough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha what a mess!  
> stay tuned for more messes
> 
> i hope u dont miss chan too much


	4. "I think you'd really like him, Mom"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Chan gets invited to party with the cool kids.  
> Being banned from the silent floor of the library was worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok u know those filler episodes in anime?  
> like when they all go to the beach or something?  
> this is exactly like that
> 
> i just needed to write another chapter so i can post my other chapters without them feeling weirdly out of order  
> so enjoy the bullshit

On a night when the team didn’t have practice, Chan went to the library to try to get some work done, like a good student, but was spotted by Jeonghan, which dropped his chances of actually getting work done to nearly impossible (even on a day when they didn’t have practice, Chan couldn’t escape this team).

Jeonghan shouted his name, getting Chan’s attention as well as the entire floor of the library’s attention.

Chan quickly walked over to Jeonghan, head dropped low hoping to not be noticed by the students at those ugly wooden library desks trying to study. At least Jeonghan was hidden between the rows of books, placing returned books back on the shelves. Maybe Chan could hide with him. Even though it was Jeonghan’s fault he was hiding from studying students in the first place.

“What’s up? You busy?” Jeonghan asked, only smiling at Chan for a moment before bringing his focus back to book spines.

“I mean, I was hoping to get some of this paper written,” Chan started, fiddling with the straps of his backpack hanging on his shoulders.

“That doesn’t sound fun. Talk to me instead, I’m bored,” Jeonghan said nonchalantly, still focusing on the books he was re-shelving.

Chan never really had the opportunity to talk to Jeonghan, just the two of them together. Chan had only been practicing with the team for about two weeks, he really wasn’t able to talk to anyone that much, save for the sophomores who took him into their little friend group. Chan’s knowledge of Jeonghan was limited. He knew he lived with Wonwoo, the two were pretty close. Chan also thought he overheard that Jeonghan was getting his Master’s in Psych or something (Chan worried about Jeonghan being someone’s therapist—imagine Jeonghan as your therapist, Dr. Yoon, psychoanalyzing you—okay never mind, don’t think about it because that’s pretty terrifying.)

Chan still wanted Jeonghan to like him (even if he was a little terrified of him) so he said, “Yeah, okay. For a little bit,” with a shy smile.

“Perfect, my shift is over in 30 minutes anyways,” Jeonghan said, placing another book on the shelf haphazardly, perhaps a little excited he would have someone to look at instead of old books. “So, what’s going on with you? You doing anything cool before our first scrimmage this weekend?”

“I was going to work on this essay for freshman lit,” Chan began. “It’s due Friday night.”

“I could probably write it for you. I write papers for extra cash. I charge 10 bucks per page, or a penny a word,” Jeonghan explained.

“No it’s okay, really,” Chan said.

“I’m pretty good. Since I already went through four years of writing undergrad papers, I can usually get anyone at least a B. Ask Vernon. I write his papers all the time,” Jeonghan continued, scooting Chan down the aisle as he dragged his little cart of books still needing to be shelved further down the stacks.

“I’m fine. It’s not a hard paper. I’ll be okay,” Chan said, watching Jeonghan’s hands place books. “Thanks for the offer though.”

“Well, what else are you up to? Have you been to any good parties? Are you eating your vegetables?” Jeonghan asked, eyes scanning the numbers on the spine of a book he needed to place in its correct position on the shelves, only looking up to focus on Chan for a moment.

“Aren’t we supposed to not talk in the library?” Chan asked nervously, tone soft, seeing the students who were trying to study burn holes in head with tired eyes. The library was divided into three floors by the levels of volume: the talking floor, the quiet floor, and the floor they were on—the silent floor.

“Honestly, fuck it. Nobody even really cares,” Jeonghan assured him. Jeonghan really didn’t like his job at the library, he probably should have been fired a long time ago. In fact, he was almost fired back at the end of his junior year. And it was a wonderful kind of coincidence that the coach of the hockey team was the individual who almost got him fired.

 

Jeonghan and Seungcheol both entered the university in their freshman years, they were even placed in the same dorm housing. They met as the hockey team’s only freshman four years ago, but Seungcheol was graduating early. Maybe it was because he was a really good student. Or maybe because he wanted to leave that shitty university as fast as he could. It was a toss-up in Jeonghan’s opinion.

At the end of Jeonghan’s junior year—Seungcheol’s senior year—Seungcheol came into the library trying to fix a fine he had for a library book that was overdue. He didn’t even really remember checking the book out, but he got some email telling him if he didn’t pay this fine, he couldn’t graduate.

So Seungcheol waltzed into the university’s library, hoping to resolve the issue.

“Hello, what can I do for you?” the tired student at the front desk greeted him.

“Hey, I kind of have this fine for some book that’s overdue. I don’t know where the book is so I can’t return it. But I’m graduating and need this fine off my account,” Seungcheol said.

“Well, you could pay the fine and we’d be happy to take it off your account for you,” the student calmly told him.

“Okay, but I don’t have the money to pay the fine. Is there any way you could just take it off my account and say I paid?” Seungcheol asked. “You’re a student too, you know how it is, right?”

“I really can’t do that, sorry,” the student said.

Seungcheol frowned, turning his head away from the student at the desk, only to spot Jeonghan working at the computer further down the desk. Jeonghan got his job at the library back during his freshman year. He needed help paying tuition and checking out books and re-shelving them days later was it.

“Hey Jeonghan, I didn’t know you were working today,” Seungcheol smiled.

“What do you need?” Jeonghan asked, slightly annoyed, not looking up from the monitor screen.

“Can you get rid of that fine on my account?” Seungcheol asked.

“Technically yeah,” Jeonghan told him, eyes still focused on the screen.

“Please help me out here. You know I’d totally do the same for you,” Seungcheol said, chin resting on his arms crossed on the desk, looking up at Jeonghan with pleading eyes.

“Okay fine, but don’t tell anyone. I can’t do this for everybody,” Jeonghan said.

“You totally would though,” Seungcheol smiled.

“You’re right. I hate this job. But I still need it,” Jeonghan said. And with a few clicks of a mouse, a few taps of fingers on keys, Jeonghan announced, “Okay, you’re free of your fine and free to leave this hell hole of a university.”

“Thanks so much dude. You’re a life-saver,” Seungcheol said, springing up from the desk.

And this encounter was not missed by the student Seungcheol originally spoke to. The only thing Jeonghan could do to get his coworker not to tell their boss was for Jeonghan to sell the kid some Adderall from his roommate. Weird how the world works.

 

“So no parties?” Jeonghan continued, nonchalantly.

“Oh, no, not really. I don’t really have any interest in-” Chan started.

“Do you want to come over Jun’s place this Friday night? We were thinking about having a team party, since we still need to get to know each other. Well, I guess that’s just you. But I’m off of work since the library closes early on Fridays. I think Wonwoo should be free too, since he never works nights. And I think Jun’s free too, since I don’t think anyone goes to the school bookstore on Friday night—how sad would that be?” Jeonghan rambled on. “We all don’t get a chance to hang out that often with our schedules so we thought it’d be perfect to have a little team bonding party while we’re all free.”

Chan was unsure of what to do. He thought it was cool for the older players to want to hang out with him. But would it be a party? Like, with alcohol? Chan avoided those in high school. With his overprotective mom, there’d be no way for him to go even if he wanted to—which he didn’t.

And before Chan could stop himself, his desire to be initiated into the hockey team’s friend group spoke up for him, “Sure, I’ll go. What time?”

Jeonghan smiled, “I don’t know yet. Since we have a game Saturday I don’t want it too late. Do you know where Jun’s is? You can walk there. It’s not that far from campus. I think Minghao is going. We usually invite him because he’s chill. So he can show you where it is. Vernon and Seungkwan are, less chill, but they can come if you want. I know you’re pretty comfortable with them.”

“That sounds cool,” Chan smiled.

Jeonghan ruffled Chan’s hair with a smile and said, “Here, put your number in my phone so I can text you,” handing Chan the phone from his pocket.

Chan felt like he was finally becoming cool (minus the whole ruffling of hair thing). It was a long time coming. But now he was going to some older kids’ party. And one of said older kids wanted his phone number (to just text him the time of the party, but still, pretty cool). 

Once Chan handed Jeonghan’s phone back to him, Jeonghan told Chan he was tired of working and was gonna go fuck around in the library café until the end of his shift (he told Chan they made him free drinks because of some weird unofficial employee discount), so Chan was free to start writing that boring essay Jeonghan was still offering to write for him.

When Chan sat down in a far corner of the library to start working on said essay, he couldn’t stop smiling. He couldn’t believe he got invited to a real college party. He would love to tell his mom if he wasn’t so afraid she would drive down to campus and stop him from going. He could tell her that some nice guy on the team wanted to be friends though, his mom might like that. His mom would probably like Jeonghan. As long as Chan left out all the horrible things about Jeonghan.

 

* * *

 

Chan got a text Friday morning from Jeonghan that read that the party would be at 7pm. Chan wouldn’t say he was excited (but he was totally excited). Chan also had Minghao’s phone number (they exchanged numbers after eating following that dryland practice last week—something that also excited Chan) so Chan texted him asking if he could tag along with him to Junhui’s. Minghao told him he was also taking Vernon and Seungkwan so they could all go together. Chan’s Friday classes went well because he was so excited to be a part of a friend group. Maybe college wouldn’t be so bad, now that he had some friends (maybe not the friends he typically gravitated towards, but friends nonetheless).

Around 6:45 that night, Chan met Minghao in Vernon and Seungkwan’s dorm. A horrible, smelly place (reminiscent of a nuclear war zone) Chan did not want to revisit. They had bunk beds, Chan wondered which one of them had the unfortunate spot on the top bunk (which didn’t feature a ladder).

“Are we gonna pregame before we go?” Seungkwan asked, watching his roommate search through his clothes.

Chan didn’t know what he meant by that. He thought pregame meant the stuff that comes on ESPN before some football game talking about player stats. Like, before the game—a pregame report?

“They’ll have a ton of alcohol there for sure. I don’t think we need to use any of our own,” Vernon said, going through his drawers, looking for something.

Chan felt a little lost. Maybe Minghao noticed this and tried to ease his nerves by doing what he did best—making fun of those around them. “I’m not sure you can handle pre-drinks as well as you think you can. I’m not carrying you to and from Jeonghan’s when you decide to get blackout on wine coolers.”

“I am not a lightweight! You’ve only seen me when Jeonghan makes that weird jungle juice. I can handle a glass of wine just fine!” Seungkwan whined, sitting on the edge of his bed (Vernon must have had the top bunk, that poor uncoordinated kid didn’t need any more problems), watching Vernon. “What are you even looking for?” he said to his roommate.

“My beanie. The light blue one. I don’t remember where it is,” Vernon replied, too focused to look over at Seungkwan.

“Isn’t that the one you let me borrow? I think it’s back at my dorm,” Minghao said.

“Duuude, you’re right. Damn. I really wanted to wear it tonight,” Vernon said, trying to shut his overflowing drawer.

“Don’t you have like 3,000 other beanies? Just wear one of those,” Seungkwan complained.

“But I like the blue one. It’s soft,” Vernon whined.

“I’m not wasting any more time here. If we aren’t gonna pregame, let’s go,” Seungkwan said, getting up from his bed.

 

The four boys showed up to Junhui’s and Soonyoung’s apartment situated in some little complex that looked like mostly student housing. Minghao found it easy enough (Jeonghan did say he was the one they liked to invite). Vernon was wearing a neon green beanie (which Seungkwan said looked like a highlighter), looking upset because it wasn’t the one he wanted. Seungkwan was annoyed with Vernon because he didn’t think wearing the right beanie was that big of a problem. Minghao was cool and collected, like always, telling Chan about some story in which Vernon let Minghao’s skateboard get hit by a car.

 

Apparently Minghao was trying to teach Vernon how to skateboard one night around finals, when a lot of students had gone home early and only those with finals on the last days were forced to stick around. Minghao was on his longboard across from Vernon as he was trying to show Vernon how to place his feet on the board. The two of them illuminated by the streetlights and the headlights of cars passing by.

Looking back on it, they probably shouldn’t have been trying to do this next to a busy street, but you have to work with what you got on a busy campus.

When Vernon was finally comfortable enough to move on Minghao’s skateboard, Minghao got off his own board and jogged next to Vernon, making sure he didn’t bust his ass when he fell off. The board picked up speed as Vernon was riding down the small slope of the campus sidewalk, slightly too fast for Vernon’s comfort level. Vernon was forced to hop off to try to save himself from crashing, but the skateboard flew out from underneath his feet and rolled into the busy street. And with Vernon’s luck (or lack of it), a car was driving by at just the right time (or technically, the wrong time) and ran over the board.

The two boys watched in silence as the skateboard bounced off the car’s wheel and flipped back over in the middle of the street. The car driving behind the first’s tires squealed against the pavement as the driver quickly braked in order to avoid hitting the board. Minghao ran out into the street to retrieve the skateboard, and Vernon could only say a shy “sorry” when Minghao returned, eyes casted downwards.

“It’s okay. It’s pretty durable. There’s no damage,” Minghao smiled, eyes still focused on examining the board.

“I don’t think I wanna learn anymore,” Vernon said quietly. Minghao just laughed.

 

“I already said sorry for letting your skateboard get hit by a car!” Vernon whined.

“Yeah, but I like telling the story,” Minghao smiled.

At that moment, Junhui opened the door to his shared apartment and let the kids in. “Chan, I’m so glad you decided to come. We finally get to hang out and learn what you’re like outside of practice,” Junhui smiled, cup of something in his hand. Chan felt a little bad that he didn’t think he was any different outside of practice, but smiled. Junhui told them, “Okay, take your shoes off here so you don’t track in mud. We keep a good home and I don’t need you delinquents ruining it.” Soonyoung shouted something like ‘yeah we keep a _nice_ home!’ from wherever he was.

Chan was pretty nervous about being at his first college party (technically it was a college party, okay? Even if it just was his hockey team—his _college_ hockey team), with all the drinking and whatnot, but thought he was saved when he saw a cat. Chan kneeled down next to her holding his hand out for her to sniff. “What’s her name?”

“Ask her,” Mingyu stated from his spot in the kitchen doorway.

“Oh, okay, I’m sorry,” Chan said, a little thrown off. Out of nervousness, in a softer tone, Chan said to the cat, “Hi there, what’s your name?”

Mingyu broke out into laughter at Chan’s question. “Oh my god, it’s funny every time,” he chuckled.

Chan had a puzzled look on his face, being afraid he missed out on some inside joke.

Junhui sighed, “Mingyu named the cat ‘Ask Her.’ He thought it would be funny. And as you can see, he really does think it’s funny.”

“Oh,” Chan said, looking back at the poorly-named cat.

“It’s pretty childish if you ask me,” Jeonghan said. He was on their couch, sitting next to Soonyoung and Wonwoo. And Soonyoung and Wonwoo were finding it hard to look at each other without laughing. They were children.

“We just call her ‘Cat’ or ‘Her.’ It’s pretty unfortunate he gave her that shitty name,” Junhui continued, looking down at the friendly, but poorly-named, cat. “I don’t think I should even let Mingyu have her next year. She’s too good for him.”

“But if I didn’t name her that, we’d never get to experience the awesome joke,” Mingyu whined.

 

Chan probably spent about twenty minutes playing with the cat, sitting in the middle of the living room, able to listen to all the conversations around him. All the sophomores were there (Chan came with them), Mingyu was there—staying with Chan to play with the cat he so-awfully named—and Wonwoo and Jeonghan made it. Chan didn’t spot Jisoo which kind of bummed him out. He would have liked to been able to talk with him, he thought they had a lot in common (Chan figured Jisoo didn’t like parties either). Chan was also bummed that one kid who radiated sunshine wasn’t there; he probably would have been nice to talk to. At least to ask him for his name.

Jeonghan and Junhui had moved rooms to gossip about something Chan probably wouldn’t have understood. Minghao and Vernon had left with Wonwoo and Soonyoung to smoke in that time span. But the four came back from wherever they were and all took their places in the living room. Vernon appeared to be continuing some story that had Wonwoo and Soonyoung’s full attention.

“Dude so,” Vernon began, sitting cross-legged on the carpeted floor.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo added, watching Vernon’s hands slowly move when he spoke.

“Okay so, dude, I was on campus right? And like, I was _soooo_ hungry. Honestly, I shouldn’t have taken a block class at lunch time. So here I am, hungry,” Vernon slurred the words to his incredibly boring story.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo added again. (Was Wonwoo okay?)

“So I went to that weird little café. You know the one? In the basement of the bookstore. So I went there. Okay. And I got this bagel. And—stay with me—they made it like a peanut butter jelly. But like it was on a bagel. And it was toasted.”

“Holy fuck that sounds so good,” Soonyoung said from his spot laying on the floor, legs propped up on the couch next to Wonwoo. He was looking at Vernon upside-down which probably made the story a lot more interesting.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo said.

“Dude it was so good,” Vernon said.

“Dude I bet,” Soonyoung added.

Chan wondered how in the world any of these guys made conversation. He figured it was probably better than spending his time playing with a cat and not talking to anybody else.

 

Jeonghan and Junhui were in the shared bedroom, both sitting on Junhui’s bed, each sipping on some liquid (probably shitty boxed wine since Jeonghan mentioned that the team shouldn’t have liquor the night before a scrimmage).

“Jisoo didn’t come?” Jun asked.

“No. He said he was busy,” Jeonghan replied. “Honestly, I don’t think he’d be much fun anyways. I’m not sure he’s much of a partier.”

“Again, why do you like him?” Jun asked, raising a judging eyebrow.

“You and Wonwoo keep asking me that. I just think he’s cute, okay?”

“There’s tons of cute guys who are actually fun. You don’t have to date a boring cute guy.”

“I don’t feel like taking relationship advice from you,” Jeonghan said, sipping on his cup.

“Hey, I’m great at relationships,” Jun scoffed.

“And how many times have you fucked your roommate?” Jeonghan asked.

“Only like, three times? I don’t count the fourth time because I didn’t know it was him until afterwards. Anyways, that doesn’t count because we aren’t an item or anything,” Jun explained. “Drunk sex doesn’t count towards my relationship stats.”

“Well, I’m not interested in being an item with Jisoo either. We’re just fucking around, okay?” Jeonghan said defensively.

“People don’t look at guys who they just want to fuck like the way you look at Jisoo. I think you like him,” Jun smirked.

“He’s so boring. It’d be like dating my 80 year old grandma if I was with him. And at least my grandma was exciting in the 70’s,” Jeonghan explained. “Jisoo wasn’t even around in the 70’s.”

“Okay, grannie-fucker,” Jun smiled, turning back to his cup.

“This is why I have to be drunk when we hang out. You’re such a dick,” Jeonghan laughed.

“Wanna go pick on Vernon? We’re good at that,” Jun offered.

“I thought you’d never ask,” Jeonghan said, getting up from Jun’s bed.

 

Chan watched as Jeonghan and Junhui entered the living-room from wherever they were before. They plopped down on the sofa Wonwoo was sitting on and Soonyoung’s legs were resting on. Junhui moved Soonyoung’s legs so he could sit on the spot they were occupying, moving them back on his lap after taking his seat.

“Hey Vernon, where’s Minghao?” Jeonghan asked. Chan noticed that the tone of his voice implied Jeonghan knew Vernon’s answer was going to be good.

“I lost him when we were all smoking,” Vernon said.

“I’ve been sitting here for like 10 minutes,” Minghao said from his spot on Junhui’s weird moon chair in the corner of the room.

“I found Minghao,” Vernon said to Jeonghan.

“Wonwoo, why do you give Vernon weed?” Junhui asked while Jeonghan laughed at Vernon’s reply.

“Because it’s so funny,” Wonwoo laughed.

“We gotta make a list of people who are not allowed to be high when they come over,” Junhui announced.

“Am I on the list?” Soonyoung asked, looking up at Junhui from the floor.

“No, we live together. And I’m not even sure I’ve ever seen you fully sober,” Junhui said.

“Fair,” Soonyoung replied, allowing his head to flop back onto the carpeted floor.

“If we can’t get Vernon high, how else are we supposed to have fun?” Wonwoo asked.

Just then, Seungcheol walked into the living room, “As your coach, I don’t think we should be getting this fucked up before game day.”

“That’s why we’re just smoking. There’s not even real booze here,” Wonwoo said.

“So the tequila in the kitchen was not for us?” Seungcheol asked.

“You should be one of those drug-sniffing dogs, just for tequila. That’s, like, your talent,” Mingyu said, turning his back to the cat to address Seungcheol.

“We all have our gifts,” Seungcheol replied.

“Jeonghan’s is drinking a ¼ of a bottle of vodka in one shot,” Wonwoo added.

“A blessing and a curse,” Jeonghan sighed.

“Back to more pressing matters,” Junhui started. “I’m surprised Jihoon didn’t come. I feel like he gravitates towards you and alcohol,” Junhui told Seungcheol.

“He’s like a drug-sniffing dog for Seungcheol and booze,” Mingyu laughed.

“Well, I’m here and he’s not, so stop thinking he likes me anymore than he likes you guys,” Seungcheol said.

“Did you lose Jihoon? I just lost Minghao!” Vernon exclaimed, laughing at the coincidence that wasn’t even really there.

“Again, I’m right here buddy,” Minghao said.

“Thank god. I can’t keep losing you. You have to help me get home,” Vernon said, turning back to look at Minghao. Probably to make sure he was there.

“Come here,” Minghao said, waving Vernon to come sit in the moon chair with him. Minghao readjusted himself so Vernon was sitting between his legs, safely in the chair with him. Minghao pet the boy’s hair when he was safely situated in his lap, trying to reassure Vernon that he wasn’t lost.

“What did I say about getting Vernon high for your entertainment?” Seungcheol asked.

“Not to,” Wonwoo frowned.

“That’s right. Anyways, Jihoon ignores me just as much as he ignores all of you. For example, I asked him if he wanted to go to lunch today and he never answered,” Seungcheol explained.

“You invited Jihoon to lunch?” Jeonghan asked.

“I’ve said too much. I’m going to go get drunk,” Seungcheol said, turning back to the kitchen.

“No! Come back and talk to me!!” Jeonghan exclaimed, getting up to follow Seungcheol, expertly avoiding Soonyoung who was still on the floor.

Wonwoo turned towards Vernon and said, “Seungcheol is totally fucking Jihoon,” with a laugh.

“I want to eat like seven grilled cheeses,” Vernon replied, sitting in between Minghao’s legs.

“Can we do that?” Soonyoung asked Junhui, looking up at him from his spot still on the floor.

“Not now. We don’t have any bread or anyone sober enough to work the stove,” Junhui replied, giving Soonyoung’s knee a reassuring pat. “Well, Chan looks pretty sober,” Junhui continued, eyeing Chan now. “You alright man?”

“Yeah. I just don’t drink or anything. But it’s cool if you guys do,” Chan said, trying not to look weird. “It’s kind of fun to watch though.”

“So are you having fun?” Junhui asked.

“Yeah, of course,” Chan replied.

“Sorry we’re a little weird. You probably were expecting us to be real athletes or something when you joined this team. We’re probably disappointing,” Junhui continued, with a chuckle.

“No, it’s cool! My high school team was filled with guys who were way too serious about playing which really sucked the fun out of it. It’s nice being with guys who seem like friends rather than teammates,” Chan smiled.

Junhui smiled back, probably thinking about how cute and innocent Chan was. He probably felt bad this team was going to ruin him.

“I know none of the normal guys showed up tonight, but at least you got to see high Vernon. Seungcheol always acts like he’s disappointed in us when Wonwoo challenges to outsmoke Vernon, but he secretly loves it,” Junhui added.

“Are you guys talking about grilled cheeses? I really think we should make grilled cheeses,” Vernon said, a little too loudly, as he believed that he was too far away to be heard.

Minghao was stroking Vernon’s hair, trying to calm him, “We can eat grilled cheeses when we get back.”

“Please don’t be lying to me,” Vernon pleaded, turning his head back to face Minghao.

Chan really did think the team was pretty fun. They were a little different from the friends he had back home, but he liked them (maybe a little bit more than his other ones).

 

After listening to Vernon tell more stories that were either boring or didn’t make any sense, Seungkwan complaining about his nearly perfect life, and Mingyu’s weird conspiracy theories, Chan finally headed back to the dorms with the sophomores. When they reached campus, Chan split off from the group, going to his own building while the others found theirs.

When Minghao walked Vernon and Seungkwan back to their dorm, Vernon turned to Seungkwan at their door and said, “I’m gonna go back to Minghao’s dorm so I can pick up my beanie. I’ll be right back.”

“Yeah okay,” his roommate snorted. “Are you guys gonna be okay on your own?”

“For sure. I only had like two hits. I won’t let Vernon out of my sight,” Minghao said from outside the doorway.

“Okay, make sure he gets back here safe,” Seungkwan said.

Vernon waved Seungkwan goodbye—which didn’t convince Seungkwan he was alright—and followed Minghao up the two flights of stairs to his dorm.

Minghao’s roommate wasn’t there, which Minghao was thankful for, and he let Vernon in first after he reached over to turn the light on. “I think your hat is in my closet,” Minghao said, turning to close the door behind Vernon.

“Sweet,” Vernon said, moving to open Minghao’s closet doors, shuffling through the clothing on the top shelf. He found the hat easy enough, basically by feeling for it under all the other clothing that was in there (it really was super soft). Vernon took it in his hands and laughed, “It smells like you now.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Minghao asked.

“No. I like it,” Vernon said, lips curving upwards.

Minghao moved closer to Vernon, decreasing the distance between them. “You like the way I smell?” he smiled.

“Yeah. You always smell like really nice shampoo. Now my hat does too,” Vernon said, looking back down to the hat in his hands.

Minghao said, “You better get back to your room before Seungkwan thinks I lost you.”

“Yeah okay. I’ll see you tomorrow for that scrimmage,” Vernon smiled.

“Yeah,” Minghao said, closing the door behind Vernon when he left. He was grateful Vernon forgot about eating all those grilled cheeses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also rip to seokmin fans because he is still nameless  
> chan doesnt know a lot
> 
> get ready for new chapters very soon


	5. "I'm not going to quit, don't worry"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all routine. Calls to Mom on Sunday nights, losing games, staying over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i literally cut a bunch of shit out because it had been bothering me for the longest time  
> i left all the sad stuff in  
> of course
> 
> anyways commence sad jicheol

Jihoon was used to losing. Their team wasn’t really any good, at least not any year he played on it. Even if he had a good game keeping the goals against to a minimum, his own team couldn’t score enough goals to win. And it didn’t really bother him. Winning wasn’t really that important. What would he even get if his team won? Some W on a stat sheet that won’t matter 5 years down the road? Hell, it won’t even matter a year from now. It’s not like anyone on the club team was serious about playing. It was just a past-time.

When Jihoon’s mother would call him, every Sunday night at 8pm, she would convince him to stay on the hockey team. She knew that Jihoon wasn’t that into it—not like he used to be. He would probably like to use the time spent on practices and games studying or sleeping. But she also knew that if her son quit the only club he was a part of, he would probably never socialize with anyone at that school ever again. And Jihoon knew she was right. So he stayed on the losing team. Making his mother happy. That was important to him.

Even though Jihoon didn't mind losing much, he noticed how Seungcheol was always hurt by a loss. He started off every game with some sort of pep talk saying how the team had a chance to win this one. He would always say how the other team was missing their best players and their goalie was supposed to be bad. Within the first few minutes of playing, the team noticed how these were always lies. Opposing teams always came with 20 skaters and a good goalie—even a backup goalie. But that’s all Seungcheol could offer them in terms of a pump-up speech. Whenever the team lost, Seungcheol lost the energy he had during the beginning of the game. Jihoon didn’t know why it affected him so much to lose. It’s not like this meant anything anyways. He was a good enough coach for them. He couldn’t actually play the game for them. It wasn’t his fault that they weren’t any good. He was doing his best. He shouldn’t get so upset over losing. It didn’t mean anything.

Maybe it was because for as long as Jihoon had been on the team, Seungcheol had been their coach. And as long as Jihoon had been on their team, they always had losing seasons. Maybe Seungcheol thought it was his fault. There wasn’t anything Seungcheol could do for them. They didn’t have enough skill. That was all.

Jihoon felt a little bad for Seungcheol—having to coach the team while he was still in school himself. He heard that the team’s last coach left because the team didn’t have enough funds to give him a salary. Seungcheol stepped up as a volunteer coach until they found a new one. He never left the position though.

At the end of every game, Seungcheol would come in the locker room to say something about how the team looked like they tried their best and were improving. Saying something about how the other team was able to out-play them by having more players, and having more players who had been playing longer than them. There wasn’t more they could do but just keep practicing to win the next one.

The team wasn’t too hurt by losing. Jihoon noticed that the younger players grew a little quieter in the locker room after a loss. Which he didn’t mind. They were too loud to begin with. But nobody was too hurt about another L on their stats. It’s just how it was. You learned to deal with it. Jihoon had.

Seungcheol always made sure to tell Jihoon he had a good game, every game. Even if Jihoon let 8 goals in, “Hey, good game today,” would come out of Seungcheol’s mouth before Jihoon headed into the locker room. He would tell Jihoon again when he had packed up all of his gear and was ready to leave. Seungcheol always offered to drive Jihoon in that ugly black truck of his to practices and games, and sometimes to the store or the doctor’s if he needed a ride. Last year, Jihoon noticed that Seungcheol felt bad when Jihoon told him that he had to see a physical therapist to make sure his knee injury didn’t get worse. Seungcheol obviously thought it was his fault that Jihoon got hurt in the first place, he thought he had overworked Jihoon, even when Jihoon told him that it was common for goalies to get ligament injuries—it was the nature of the position. But Seungcheol offered to drive him to the doctor’s every time he had an appointment.

After every game, it was always the same. When Jihoon appeared in the lobby of the ice rink, Seungcheol would grab his bag and sticks for him and walk them over to his truck to put them in the bed. Jihoon would follow slowly, pads draped over his shoulder. Seungcheol would carefully take them for him and place them in the bed along with his other gear when Jihoon caught up with him in the parking lot.

They didn’t speak much. They had a comfortable silence. Seungcheol knew Jihoon well enough that he could read his body language, decide when to speak, when to act—especially after a (losing) game. Seungcheol only really spoke up on their drives home to ask “Are you going to come over today?” Jihoon would occasionally take him up on the offer. Going over Seungcheol’s was a good way to de-stress, Jihoon thought. Any energy that wasn’t worked out during a game, he spent working it out with Seungcheol’s fingers crooked up his ass.

It was hard to say when the whole thing started. Maybe it was last year when Seungcheol was able to buy that run-down truck and began offering to give Jihoon rides to practice. The truck really only fit two people and the bed was good for transporting his goalie gear, so Jihoon was the clear choice to give rides to. Jihoon heard enough shit from Wonwoo, telling him that it was obvious Seungcheol was playing favorites. Jihoon never failed to miss the suggestive eyebrow raises from the kid whenever Seungcheol mentioned anything having to do with Jihoon. But he knew it wasn’t like that. Jihoon figured he was chosen by Seungcheol due to the convenience of it all. Not because Seungcheol had any special feelings for him. Jihoon was just a quick fuck after a game or sometimes a practice, or sometimes on a Tuesday night when he was bored. If Jihoon had a bad week at school, maybe midterms or projects, Seungcheol would ask him to come over and work off the stress. Jihoon knew that Seungcheol couldn’t possibly like him, with the way Jihoon treated him.

It wasn’t that Jihoon didn’t like Seungcheol—he treated everyone the same. He didn’t have the energy to pretend to care about anyone’s problems, to listen about how their classes were going. He didn’t have the energy to go meet people to hang out, even people he liked. He didn’t have the energy to care about being liked by others. He did what he could just to get through school, to get through the day.

Maybe Seungcheol was okay with it. Jihoon figured he had to be because Seungcheol still wanted to hang out, still wanted to spend time together. Seungcheol always made the effort to see Jihoon. He even texted Jihoon about getting together for lunch the Friday before their scrimmage.

Jihoon got the text, eyes scanning over the words for just a moment, before tossing his phone back into his bed and covering his face with blankets. Jihoon hated that Seungcheol remembered that Jihoon was free after 11:45am on Fridays, free for lunch if he wanted. Jihoon hated that Seungcheol remembered things about him. When Jihoon only remembered where Seungcheol’s apartment was. Jihoon didn’t know where Seungcheol worked, he didn’t even know what he majored in. He didn’t remember what position Seungcheol played before he started coaching them. Jihoon didn’t know Seungcheol’s favorite team, or other sports he followed. Why did Seungcheol waste time remembering things like that about Jihoon? When he knew Jihoon couldn’t do the same for him. Couldn’t or wouldn’t, who knows.

That Friday, Jihoon wanted to go see Seungcheol. He wanted to interact with someone. But, he also didn’t. He wanted to stay in bed, not talking to anyone. He needed to recharge after a long week of school. He needed to save his energy for talking to people at their scrimmage. He couldn’t waste any of that energy on Seungcheol. Even if he wanted to.

Jihoon hated that the only time it seemed like he wanted to hang out with Seungcheol was when they were fucking. It wasn’t like that.

Even though that’s how it looked.

Their relationship wasn’t anything more than friends with benefits. The benefit being the chance to work off the stress of the week with someone who needed the same thing. That’s what this whole thing was anyways. A stress-reliever. Jihoon wasn’t interested in making it anything different. He wasn’t really interested in a relationship. The only time he ever held Seungcheol’s hand was when he was under him in bed. And he wanted to keep it that way.

He knew a relationship wouldn’t be the right thing to do. Jihoon wasn’t in the right place for a relationship—mentally or emotionally. He was too exhausted trying to care for himself throughout the week. Jihoon knew he wasn’t motivated enough to try to talk to Seungcheol on a regular basis. To go out together. To do nice things for Seungcheol.

He figured Seungcheol felt the same.

Except, Seungcheol didn’t.

 

When the team played their first game of the season—well, their first scrimmage—and lost it, everything went exactly as it always did. Seungcheol started off the game by saying that they had a good shot to win a lot of games this season—maybe take the division title. They picked up Chan and Jisoo, who could both help the team with their experience. Seungcheol decided to have Jisoo dress for the scrimmage because it was just a practice essentially, and he needed to see if he would be able to work well with the team. If he managed to do a good job, Seungcheol would work on his eligibility with the school to get him to play for real. And Jisoo was really a big help for their scrimmage. Seungcheol thought that both he and Chan were excellent additions to the team.

But it still didn’t prevent them from losing. They only lost 1-2, but it was still a loss. And, like always, Seungcheol pulled Jihoon aside before he could enter the locker room after the game to say, “Hey, good game today.” He couldn’t let Jihoon think the loss was his fault. It never was. Nobody was surprised when Seungcheol gave one of his typical post-loss speeches, something about just working hard in practice next week to win when it counts. Nobody on the team was that surprised by another loss. (Chan wasn’t even surprised, with how often the team spoke to him about their lack of talent.) They knew how the season was going to go. Seungcheol really wished that it wouldn’t be another year full of L’s. It was hard to keep their spirits up.

When Jihoon exited the locker room, pads over his shoulder, bag dragging behind him, sticks in his left hand, Seungcheol was there immediately to help him with his gear. Jihoon didn’t protest, he never did. He let him take his gear. Seungcheol reminded him, “Good game today. Really.” Jihoon didn’t reply. Maybe he nodded. Seungcheol couldn’t tell.

The two of them walked to the dark parking lot where Seungcheol’s truck was sitting, under one of the only lights in the lot, illuminating the rust on the truck’s wheel wells. Jihoon stood next to him as Seungcheol tossed his gear in the bed, carefully peeling the pads that were resting on Jihoon’s shoulders to place them in the back as well. When Seungcheol was finished making sure everything was secure, Jihoon walked over to the passenger side to wait for Seungcheol to unlock the door for him. When he heard the sound, he opened the door and got inside. Even the door handles were covered in rust, it was almost uncomfortable to touch as he opened the door. Seungcheol soon followed after him, putting the keys in the ignition.

“I hope you’re not thinking about the game. It was just a scrimmage and the team made a lot of mistakes. I know it’s hard to make that many saves when you’re seeing that amount of shots. A few are bound to slip in. We’ll practice a lot more before we play the games that actually count. This doesn’t affect your stats or anything. You know that,” Seungcheol explained as he looked behind his shoulder to pull out of the parking spot, putting his right arm on the back of Jihoon’s seat. And they sat in silence for a little while, Jihoon watching the streetlights illuminate the road in front of them.

Once Seungcheol got closer to Jihoon’s apartment building near campus, he finally spoke up to ask Jihoon what he always asked him, “Do you want to come over today?”

Jihoon knew it was coming. It always happened. But today he thought about it a little longer than he usually did. And Seungcheol noticed. “Let’s hang out at my place today,” Jihoon offered.

“Yeah, of course,” Seungcheol said. He knew Jihoon didn’t live with a roommate. The kid apparently dropped out within the first few weeks of school due to some family problem, and the school never assigned Jihoon another roommate. Maybe because it was hard to find kids willing to live in those weird university apartments already weeks into the school year. But Jihoon liked living alone. He did better alone. And he knew that it scared the rest of the team when they all thought that he made his roommate drop out. And he liked when the team was scared of him. Seungcheol knew this.

Seungcheol was familiar with the building and knew where to park. This wasn’t the first time that he’d come over Jihoon’s. It was odd for Jihoon to ask him to come over after a game though. Maybe it was because he wanted to make sure he could air out his gear in his own apartment. It also meant he could shower in his own shower.

Jihoon exited the passenger seat when Seungcheol turned the car off. Seungcheol removed his gear from the bed of the truck, handing Jihoon the sticks to carry, as Seungcheol chose to carry both his bag and his pads. And the two of them walked into the back entrance of his building, taking the elevator down to his room. Of course the school gave Jihoon an apartment in the basement of the building. They knew it would fit his angry troll aesthetic. But Jihoon liked it because the windows never let any light in. His apartment was technically half underground and half above. His windows basically only gave him a view of the grass that he knew was near parking lot. Nobody ever came near it since most of the residents of the building were young students and didn’t even have cars. Seungcheol always thought it was too dark, but he knew Jihoon liked it.

Jihoon unlocked the door, put his sticks in the corner behind the door, and then moved so Seungcheol could enter behind him. Seungcheol placed Jihoon’s gear carefully near the door. He slipped his shoes off and stood awkwardly, waiting for Jihoon to tell him what to do. Seungcheol always let Jihoon tell him what he wanted. He never seemed like he wanted to make a mistake by doing something Jihoon didn’t like. He was so used to being careful around Jihoon. Jihoon walked over to where he was, unzipped his bag to let his gear air out. Sure, it made the small living room/foyer smell like shit, but at least it would make his pads smell better in the end. And it didn’t bother Seungcheol too much. He had been playing hockey long enough that the smell never fazed him. Jihoon kicked off his own shoes and signaled for Seungcheol to follow him to his small kitchen.

“Are you doing anything tomorrow,” Jihoon said, standing in front of his small fridge. It really wasn’t said like a question. Jihoon never really asked anything as a question when he wanted something. He sort of just demanded things.

“No, it’s Sunday so I don’t have to go into work or anything,” Seungcheol replied leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen, eyes on Jihoon.

“Okay, I’m gonna open this bottle of wine,” Jihoon said, pulling a bottle of white wine out from the bottom of his fridge. It was a bottle Seungcheol bought him not too long ago. Jihoon got out 2 cups, not bothering to ask if Seungcheol wanted any. He’d pour him a cup anyways. If Jihoon was offering him alcohol, it usually meant he was open for Seungcheol staying the night. Because Jihoon wouldn’t let him drive home with even a drop of alcohol in his system. It was these little things they did, that they just understood. Seungcheol didn’t need to ask Jihoon things. And Jihoon didn’t need to tell him.

Seungcheol took the cup Jihoon offered and started sipping on it. Jihoon exited the small kitchen to walk into the living room which was also the foyer and also his bedroom (it was a small apartment). He didn’t have a couch or anything, so he sat on the head of his bed, near the edge, feet dangling off. Seungcheol followed him, wordlessly. It was one those dorm beds, slightly too high off of the ground for anyone to rest their feet comfortably on the floor. These school apartments were weird in the way that they were basically off-campus housing, but filled with shitty dorm furniture. That’s probably why nobody liked living in them.

“Everybody missed you at that party last night. Why didn’t you go?” Seungcheol started.

“I didn’t feel like it. I don’t like parties,” Jihoon said.

“But you like alcohol,” Seungcheol said. He felt like an ass for saying that. But he couldn’t take it back now.

“I don’t need to go to Jun’s to get it,” Jihoon replied.

There was a silence between them for a bit. Seungcheol not knowing how to fix the weird mood he created between them. Talking to Jihoon after a loss was comparable to walking on eggshells. Seungcheol didn’t know what the right thing to say to him was. To not act like he was pitying Jihoon, but at the same time giving him enough space to not upset him.

“What do you think about the team’s chances this year after seeing them play today?” Seungcheol asked in between sips of wine.

“I think it’ll go just like last year,” Jihoon stated, eyes focused on the stain on the floor in front of him, most-likely left from the previous resident. “Just look at today.”

“Don’t say that. I think we might be able to do better,” Seungcheol explained. “I know we lost all those seniors from last year, but we still have a lot of players with skills.”

“And who would they be,” Jihoon stated. It would be a question if it was stated by anyone other than Jihoon.

“Well, we have Chan now. He’s already better than most of the older guys,” Seungcheol started.

“Yeah, he’s good,” Jihoon murmured into his cup.

“Jisoo’s pretty good too. I’m not sure he’ll be eligible to play though. I can try to work on it with the school. It’d be nice to have him play too,” Seungcheol continued. “I know Jeonghan has been begging for another D partner.”

Jihoon only offered a small hum of agreement.

“And we still have you. You’re really incredible. I know you’re upset we lost. But if we didn’t have you, we would lose 0-12 every game no doubt,” Seungcheol said, eyes shifting to glance at Jihoon.

“Are you gonna act like you want to make small talk, or do you just wanna flirt with me so you can fuck me,” Jihoon said.

“Do you want my honest answer?” Seungcheol asked, smiling against the rim of his cup, trying to hold back a chuckle.

“No, just kiss me already,” Jihoon said, reaching over to place his cup on the nightstand next to the bed after taking a long sip from it, finishing off the cup. Seungcheol followed suit, placing his near-empty cup on the floor a little too far out of reach, before moving back to Jihoon, cupping his face with one hand, thumb tracing little circles on his cheek bone. Seungcheol knew that Jihoon hated when he stalled like this, but he liked doing little things like this for Jihoon. To show him that maybe he didn’t think Jihoon was just a quick fuck—but that he was more.

Jihoon got impatient and decided to be the one who brought their lips together, slightly rushed. He took Seungcheol’s bottom lip between his teeth, sucking on it before sliding his tongue into his warm mouth. Jihoon was eager, teeth clashing against Seungcheol’s slightly, and his fingers thumbing at the hem of Seungcheol’s shirt. Seungcheol didn’t want to rush things, he loved being with Jihoon. He didn’t want it to end. But he still let Jihoon remove his shirt for him, tossing it on the floor, before capturing his lips again. Jihoon placed his hands on Seungcheol’s sides, almost guiding him backwards as his thighs straddled Seungcheol's sides, and moved to put his lips on Seungcheol’s bare chest, nipping lightly at his collarbones. (He wouldn’t leave a mark, they had an agreement that prevented anyone from giving the other one hickeys or bruises. It was really a formal agreement. They planned this stuff out.) Jihoon spent a while just leaving open-mouth kisses on Seungcheol’s chest, using his teeth to lightly nip at his skin, (well, a little less lightly than Seungcheol would have liked, but he let Jihoon do it anyway. Anything to make Jihoon feel better) then soothing Seungcheol’s skin with light kisses. Jihoon placed kisses from Seungcheol’s collarbones to his navel, dull nails gently scratching against Seungcheol’s sides.

Seungcheol tried to regain control and positioned Jihoon with his back nearly against the headboard so he could press himself on top of him, grinding into him ever so slightly. He decided to sit in between Jihoon’s legs, with his thighs resting right below Jihoon’s pelvis, just so Jihoon couldn’t get any friction from it, causing Jihoon to let a tiny whine escape his lips. The two kept their comfortable silence, even in bed. This was a regular occurrence for them. They usually didn’t need to talk much.

Until Jihoon sat up slightly with a hand on Seungcheol’s neck, bringing him in closer to whisper, “Finger me already,” into Seungcheol’s ear, his other arm was grabbing at his nightstand, reminding Seungcheol where he kept his lube. And Seungcheol was glad that those were the words that broke their silence.

But Seungcheol hated the eagerness, the rushed kisses. He wanted to savor his time with Jihoon, the only time where Jihoon let himself be vulnerable like this. Seungcheol didn’t know what his relationship with Jihoon was. Or what it entailed. But it wasn’t just this, not just sex after a game.

 

Seungcheol and Jihoon had this arrangement for a while. It started last year, when they went to Jeonghan’s and Wonwoo’s apartment for some “team” party. Seungcheol got pretty drunk, because there was a limit to how sober you could be to handle all the dumb shit that spouted out of the team’s mouths. Especially Mingyu’s. And Soonyoung’s. Okay, everybody’s mouths.

At that party, Mingyu was sitting on the floor next to that ugly floral print couch, staring blankly at the corner of the room.

“What are you thinking so hard about, Mingyu?” Wonwoo asked from his place seated on the couch above him.

“Do you think we’ve ever had a gay president? Like, look at the odds. There were a lot of presidents,” Mingyu said before taking another sip from his drink. Said drink was a sinister concoction Jeonghan made from about 8 different kinds of alcohol he had laying around the house. He and Wonwoo agreed not to buy anything new until they got rid of the old shit they had. And neither of them wanted to drink the old alcohol they were tired of. So they figured they would host a team party to get rid of everything. Thus, Jeonghan’s Jungle Juice was created and nobody came out of that party with their reputations intact.

“Well, they all had, like, wives right? First ladies?” Wonwoo asked.

 “Maybe Ben Franklin was gay. That’s why he couldn’t be president,” Mingyu offered.

“I don’t think that’s right,” Jeonghan added, coming into the living room with a fresh cup of whatever the hell he was serving.

“Well, he never had a first lady,” Mingyu argued.

“Okay, but he couldn’t have had a first lady because he was never president,” Jeonghan continued, sitting nearly on Wonwoo’s lap on the couch (causing Wonwoo to release an angry whine).

“That’s what I’m saying. They wouldn’t let him be president because he was gay,” Mingyu repeated, turning to look up at Jeonghan.

“No-” Jeonghan said before Soonyoung cut him off.

“Oh my god, Mingyu you’re like that National Treasure guy. Uncovering America’s secrets,” Soonyoung said excitedly.

“I can’t believe we cracked the code,” Mingyu shouted, turning to Soonyoung with a big smile.

“What the fuck is going on?” Seungcheol shouted at the group. He could only sit there so long before losing it. (Also he was sitting in the garbage chair. Not a good move.) Honestly, why did he bother hanging out with these fucking weirdos? (Better question: why did he bother coaching them?) The only solution to not wanting to punch them all in the face was to get wasted on Jeonghan’s unholy drink mix and forget he was the only semi-normal person there.

The only problem with that plan was that drunk Seungcheol wasn’t as good at playing it cool like sober Seungcheol was. (Someone would argue that sober Seungcheol never played it cool. That someone would probably be Jeonghan or Wonwoo—Seungcheol’s trusted friends whom he loved very much.) So when Seungcheol found Jihoon in the kitchen, going through the cabinets (drunk Jihoon loved going through everyone’s shit—well, sober Jihoon liked doing that too, but it was more acceptable for drunk Jihoon) Seungcheol decided to make conversation with the only other semi-normal person on the team. Drunk Seungcheol gravitated towards Jihoon (sober Seungcheol also did, but drunk Seungcheol couldn’t hide it as well).

“What’re you doing?” Seungcheol asked when he entered the kitchen.

“Just looking,” Jihoon hummed, not bothering to turn back to look at him.

“For what?”

“Anything,” Jihoon replied, eyeing the inside of a nearly barren cabinet.

“Do you want help?” Seungcheol offered.

Jihoon turned around to look at Seungcheol, eyebrows furrowed as if he was trying to solve a math problem in his head. “Yeah, come and help me look in the bathroom,” Jihoon told him, setting his cup on the counter and taking Seungcheol’s hand to drag him through the apartment to find a bathroom. Seungcheol didn’t protest.

“What are we looking for in here?” Seungcheol asked, looking around for something he thought Jihoon wanted to find after Jihoon closed the door behind him, turning the lock.

“Anything,” Jihoon said, before moving closer to Seungcheol. When their chests were almost touching, Jihoon asked, “Are you drunk.” He always asked questions as if he already knew the answers to them.

“Yeah,” Seungcheol breathed out.

“Cool, me too,” Jihoon said before moving to press his lips to Seungcheol’s.

And Seungcheol reciprocated his kiss. Seungcheol thought that all this time that he was good at hiding his interest in Jihoon. Sure, Jihoon was the only player Seungcheol offered rides too, but he didn’t think that the others would take that as him liking Jihoon (even though he did). And yeah, he let Jihoon pretty much do whatever he wanted to in practice, but that was mostly because Jihoon was pretty intimidating and Seungcheol didn’t want to have Jihoon be mad at him—it wasn’t because he liked Jihoon (even though he did). So Seungcheol was pretty surprised when Jihoon took him into this tiny bathroom to kiss him. Seungcheol wouldn’t admit that he thought about kissing Jihoon before (even though he did).

Seungcheol carefully placed a hand on the small of Jihoon’s back, not wanting to scare him off or anything, and Jihoon leaned into him more, throwing an arm around his neck to thread his fingers through the short hairs on Seungcheol’s nape. Jihoon tilted his head so he could have better access to Seungcheol’s mouth, parting Seungcheol’s lips with his tongue.

Jihoon was only a few inches shorter than Seungcheol, but Seungcheol noticed that he was straining a little bit to get access to his lips. So Seungcheol got his hands around Jihoon’s thighs to lift him and place him on the bathroom counter to continue kissing him. Jihoon wrapped his legs behind Seungcheol’s back, bringing Seungcheol’s pelvis flush against his own, causing Seungcheol to groan against Jihoon’s lips. Jihoon was basically sucking on Seungcheol’s tongue at this point, in complete control of Seungcheol.

When Seungcheol was able to slide a hand up Jihoon’s shirt, Jihoon letting him, a loud knock was heard on the door that made them both separate quickly.

“Hey, I gotta pee!” the voice said—it was Soonyoung’s. Seungcheol would remember to make him do laps in practice next week.

Jihoon slid off the counter and out of Seungcheol’s embrace, wiped his mouth off with the back of his hand, and went to open the door.

“What’re you two doing in here?” Soonyoung slurred.

Before Seungcheol could think of anything to say, still standing in the middle of the bathroom dumbfounded, Jihoon quickly responded, “I had a headache and Seungcheol was showing me where he thought they kept their aspirin.”

“Oh,” Soonyoung replied. Seungcheol couldn’t tell if he believed Jihoon or not.

“It wasn’t even in here, so sorry for taking up the bathroom. I’ll just go ask Jeonghan where he keeps it,” Jihoon said before slipping out of the small room, between the doorframe and Soonyoung’s body.

Seungcheol still didn’t know what was going on, but exited the room shortly after apologizing to Soonyoung for being in his way.

And that single encounter led to the current relationship between Seungcheol and Jihoon. As the two always met up at events that served alcohol to fuck around in any room with a lock. (And it was also the only real evidence the team had of those two fucking around.)

Seungcheol should have known with Jihoon’s indifference about seeing Soonyoung outside the bathroom, the comfort in the lie he told him, Jihoon didn’t feel the same way for Seungcheol as he did Jihoon. Seungcheol wasn’t able to put on a straight face after that kiss, but Jihoon was. He wasn’t able to calm down, but Jihoon did.

He really should have known that Jihoon never wanted anything serious from Seungcheol. Maybe Seungcheol did know. But didn’t want to break off their arrangement because it was the closest he was going to get to Jihoon without Jihoon loving him back. And Seungcheol told himself he was okay with that. He had to be.

 

Now, a year later, the two had gotten closer, gone farther in their little meetings. Maybe not close in an emotional sense, but with Seungcheol spending his Saturday night getting Jihoon off, the two had indeed gotten closer.

When he knew Jihoon was getting close, Seungcheol removed his hand from Jihoon’s cock and took Jihoon’s hand to lace their fingers together (the only time Seungcheol could get away with doing so). It wasn’t long before Jihoon was painting his own stomach with stripes of come, moaning something against Seungcheol’s lips that Seungcheol knew wasn’t his name.

When he thought Jihoon was okay, Seungcheol got up to get a towel from the bathroom a few feet away, nearly knocking over a cup still half-filled with wine in the process. When he returned, Jihoon was in the same spot on the bed, breathing heavily. He wiped off Jihoon’s stomach for him and went back to dump the towel in Jihoon’s hamper.

Jihoon looked at Seungcheol with heavy-lidded eyes, “Do you want me to take care of that,” he exhaled, pointing to the erection still in Seungcheol’s pants.

“No, it’s fine. I can take care of it myself,” Seungcheol said. “Do you want me to throw your shirt in the laundry?”

“Yeah, thanks,” Jihoon said. He made a movement like he was going to get up and remove it himself, but was ultimately too tired—too spent. Seungcheol came back to Jihoon’s bed to peel the shirt off of him, picking up the clothes he had tossed on the floor before, and threw them where he tossed the towel previously. He wanted to kiss Jihoon’s forehead, like it would be the right thing to do in that situation, but restrained himself. It wasn’t right for Jihoon. Not now.

“I’m gonna take a shower. Are you up for taking one too?” Seungcheol asked.

Jihoon whined, saying, “No, I’m too tired. You go ahead.”

“Not even after that game today?” Seungcheol laughed.

“I have to wash these sheets anyways. And I don’t wanna end up passing out in the shower,” Jihoon sighed.

Seungcheol nodded. Jihoon probably didn’t see it, but he knew Seungcheol nodded anyways.

Seungcheol wouldn’t say he was hurt that Jihoon didn’t want to join him, Jihoon did just play goal what was probably an hour or so ago. But he figured he could at least take care of himself under the hot water. That’s how it usually worked. Seungcheol making sure Jihoon got off before him. He didn’t really care if Jihoon couldn’t return the favor. It was usually better if he didn’t. Because Seungcheol didn’t want to risk saying something embarrassing when he climaxed. Something like Jihoon’s name. Or something worse. About being in love with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sex isnt real  
> remember that u heathens


	6. "So, you got the bill from that?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Chan cuts his leg open and thinks Jihoon is out to kill him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> time for a lighthearted chapter after the whole jicheol thing  
> idk if it counts as lighthearted but at least nobodys feelings get hurt  
> maybe chan's  
> but hes tough
> 
> ALSO TIME FOR SPORTS  
> okay barely  
> but more than previous chapters
> 
> also i talk about injuries so if u cant do blood n stuff  
> watch out  
> but its so mild

Chan was about to cross the blue line, puck on his stick, skating fast. He finally got a breakaway and thought this was his time to finally score. His first college goal. He couldn’t wait to tell his mom. But right as his left skate touched the line, he felt himself trip over a stick and fall down. And when he went to get back up, like he always did, he felt weird. His leg felt hot. And he looked down and saw a cut in his sock. Next thing, he was skating back to the bench shouting Seungcheol’s name. Once he was able to sit down on the bench, he said “I think I cut myself,” peeling back his sock to get a look.

“Let me see,” Seungcheol said, jumping down from the bench to kneel on the floor so he could inspect Chan. He carefully pulled Chan’s sock back and he noticed Chan’s thigh was cut. And after taking a good look at his leg, he told him, “It looks like only a scratch. You’ll be fine. Can you play the rest of the period? That trip got us a power play and I want you out there for it. We can take another look at your leg when we get the long whistle.”

“Yeah, I think I can play,” Chan said, eyes focused on his leg. There was a red mark appearing on his thigh where he thought he’d cut himself, but no blood, thankfully.

“Okay great, take Seungkwan off the ice,” Seungcheol said, jumping back on the bench to get a better look at the ice after giving Chan a reassuring pat on the shoulder.

And Chan did as he was told. He went back and played another long shift, tying to focus on something other than the pain from his leg. And when the period was finally over—there had only been about four minutes left—he went back to the bench to inspect his leg. When he pulled down his sock entirely, he saw that his thigh was now covered in blood.

“Seungcheol!” Chan announced, worry in his voice, looking for him on the bench.

“How is it?” Seungcheol asked, but immediately noticed the blood on Chan’s leg and called for Jisoo. He moved from the bench to kneel next to Chan to assess the injury himself first. He noticed that there was now a pretty big cut on his leg, and it was bleeding a lot. When Jisoo finally was able to come over to look at Chan, he noticed the blood immediately and whispered something under his breath. “Can you go find a trainer?” Seungcheol asked him.

“Yeah, of course. Can you walk?” Jisoo asked, to which Chan offered a nod with lips pursed in a tight line in reply. “C’mon Chan, let’s go look for one,” Jisoo announced, signaling for Chan to follow him out of the bench.

Chan tried to keep up with Jisoo as he walked at a pace that was slightly too fast for him next to the sheet of ice, probably worried more than Chan was. (Truthfully, Jisoo was always worried about something. Now that something was Chan. Which made him feel a little bad. For being the object of Jisoo’s nervousness.) With every hurried step, Chan could feel the cut on his leg open wider, skin pulling apart. And when Jisoo found a wooden bench next to the ice, he told Chan to sit down and wait for him to find the athletic trainer. “Keep your hands on it so we can control the bleeding,” Jisoo told him over his shoulder before exiting through the doors that led to the lobby.

So Chan just sat there, hands on his bleeding leg, watching as the timer was counting down the seconds until the team would have to start the second period. He hoped he could get back in the game quickly.

 

The only other time Chan drew blood playing hockey was when Mingyu hit him with a rogue slap shot a few practices ago. The kid had a pretty powerful shot, but again, no aim. So when Chan was trying to screen Jihoon, hoping to give Mingyu an open net to shoot on, the kid hit Chan (instead of the wide opening he tried to leave for Mingyu. Typical, really).

And usually when you get hit with a puck, you may get a bruise and that’s about it. Chan was surprised when he noticed that the warm spot on his arm was actually bloody, not just bruised.

“Are you okay?” Soonyoung asked him, who noticed that Chan was focused on the spot where he just got hit instead of the scrimmage.

“Yeah,” Chan said, focused on his arm, “He just grazed my skin I guess.” Although Mingyu couldn’t hit the net, his aim was pretty spot-on for the one place on Chan’s arm that wasn’t covered by a pad. How Mingyu managed to hit Chan’s inner elbow was pretty phenomenal. Well, not like in a good sense. But in a weird way. Like in a way that if you heard the story, you’d be like ‘wow that’s pretty incredible that you got hit in the only spot where you weren’t wearing any pads.’ It wasn’t actually phenomenal that Chan was bleeding in practice.

“Dude that’s pretty cool,” Soonyoung told him, trying to get a good look at Chan’s bloody arm. “Now you can tell your mom you got blood on your jersey. She’ll think you’re a total badass.”

“Too bad it’s my own blood,” Chan added. Soonyoung chuckled.

Chan didn’t tell his mom about the incident. He didn’t want her to worry about him (when he knew she already was). He still had the scar though.

 

And it seemed like Chan was well on his way to getting a new scar—and making his mother regret letting him play hockey in college (and Chan would argue with her that it’s not like another player did it to him—it was his own fault—and she would say something like it never would have happened if she didn’t let him play). A little girl holding her mother’s hand passed where Chan was sitting alone, waiting for Jisoo to return. She noticed that his bloody hands were holding his leg together and asked if he was okay. He assured the girl that he was fine, just a little hurt, and she told him she hoped he got better. When she walked away with her mother, Jisoo was back with paper towels and the trainer.

“Here, let me see your hands,” Jisoo said. When Chan took his hands off his leg, they were covered in blood. And Chan was amazed his body could produce so much blood from one cut. The athletic trainer was able to get a good look at Chan’s leg without his hands covering it now. Jisoo held Chan’s left wrist, stabilizing his hand, to clean it with a wet paper towel. Jisoo moved to Chan’s right hand when he thought he did an okay job of cleaning the left.

“Wow, do you know who cut you?” the trainer asked.

“I did it myself when I fell,” Chan said.

“Really? You really did a number on yourself here,” the trainer chuckled. He was using his fingers to try to press the cut together, but it never stayed closed. “How do you feel about getting stitches?” the trainer asked.

“Do I have to?” Chan asked.

“No, I guess not. I can try to tape it back together. But if it doesn’t stay, you’re going to have to go to the hospital.”

“Okay, I don’t want to miss any more of the game, so is there any chance you can try taping it up?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, I understand. I’ll do what I can,” the trainer said with a smile.

When Jisoo thought he was able to get Chan’s hands as clean as he could, he asked, “Do you want a Mentos? You get one if you draw blood. Those are the rules.”

“Yeah sure,” Chan said. It was probably all Jisoo could do for him. And it distracted him from the trainer who was trying to clean Chan’s wound for him. Chan appreciated it. He was focused on staring at the game clock, watching the time go down while the opposing team’s goals went up, as he was still sitting on the bench, not playing with his team. He felt bad for getting hurt. He wanted to be playing. Two more goals had been scored. Chan had already missed seven minutes of the second period. He was so mad he was letting the team down.

They didn’t have enough players for him to sit out for the game. Since Jisoo wasn’t playing, the team was down to three defensemen, who were quickly growing tired from having to skate the puck from one end to the other half of the time. The only help they were getting was from the two centers, Junhui and Minghao. They were pretty good, but they couldn’t play a whole game without any real help either. Chan did get to use his time on the bench to watch Minghao skate. It was unbelievable that he just started playing in college. He also got to watch a little bit of Vernon and Seungkwan play (not as incredible to watch). Chan felt bad that the other team was kind of kicking their asses. Chan knew Jihoon was not gonna be in a great mood after the game if it was only the second period and they were down 0-4 (when was Jihoon ever in a great mood anyways? Chan figured it could only get worse).

“Okay, you’re all good. Just let me know if it continues to bleed,” the trainer said, getting up to pack his equipment back into his med bag. Chan’s leg had been taped together, covered by a gauze patch, held tightly by more tape. He really hoped that’d be it.

“Thanks a lot,” Chan said, pulling his sock back up and finally leaving the wooden bench. It felt like his leg was trying to pull itself apart when he moved. But he was excited to finally get back to the game and help his teammates.

 

Chan thought it was humorous (maybe not humorous, maybe cruelly ironic) that when he first joined the team—maybe his second or third practice—squeezed in the backseat of Soonyoung’s car with Seungkwan and Vernon, he asked if anyone had ever gotten hurt while playing. Maybe it was his mother being worried for her son playing college hockey that made him ask.

“Uhhh,” Soonyoung started, stuttering while he was trying to think of a good way to word his lie. “Not like majorly, no.”

“Vernon got a concussion last year,” Minghao said calmly.

“Don’t tell him that! It’ll scare him!” Soonyoung shouted.

“He asked,” Minghao replied.

“It’s actually a funny story,” Seungkwan said.

“Please don’t tell him,” Vernon whined.

“During a game last year, probably one of our first ones, Vernon was bench-warming—much like he does now,” Seungkwan started.

“As if you weren’t there warming the bench next to me all last season,” Vernon huffed (he would cross his arms if there was any room to do so in the cramped backseat).

“Well, _I_ was on the ice when this happened so speak for yourself,” Seungkwan bragged.

“Are you saying he got the concussion when he wasn’t even playing?” Chan asked.

“Yep!” Seungkwan said with excitement. “Some kid from the other team tried to get a whistle with an icing, but the puck went off-course and was headed for our bench instead. Seungcheol saw it coming, but since he’s the coach, he didn’t have on anything to protect himself—you know, like a helmet or something,” Seungkwan explained.

“So he grabbed Vernon to use as a human shield,” Minghao stated.

“Yeah, the puck hit Vernon in the head and knocked him out cold. He was wearing a helmet! Imagine what it would have done to Seungcheol,” Seungkwan said laughing (Vernon groaning).

“But see? Nobody has ever gotten seriously injured while playing! Vernon wasn’t technically playing,” Soonyoung said, trying to make sure Chan wasn’t scared or anything. He couldn’t have the only kid who joined this season drop out because he found out people got hurt playing.

“It was a pretty bad concussion though,” Minghao mumbled.

“Yeah, I had to sit in the dark for like a week,” Vernon added.

“But you lived,” Soonyoung said.

“How about when Wonwoo sprained his wrist?” Minghao asked.

“Stop bringing this stuff up! He’s going to quit!” Soonyoung yelled, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. “You saw Chan last practice! We need him on the team. Stop sabotaging our chances for this year!” Soonyoung whined.

“Well Wonwoo wasn’t playing a game either—technically,” Seungkwan said.

“How do you guys get hurt when you’re not actually playing?” Chan asked. He wasn’t going to quit the team. Soonyoung could stop worrying.

“Okay fine, I’ll tell you,” Soonyoung sighed. “Two seasons ago, at our last practice, nobody could come because it was scheduled around spring midterms—Seungcheol didn’t even show. It was just me, Wonwoo and Jeonghan—you know them, right? Well, since no coaches were there, we decided to not dress in full pads.”

“I can’t believe you guys thought that’d be a good idea,” Minghao said staring out the window, Soonyoung shushed him.

“We were playing a small scrimmage, because what else were we gonna do with an empty ice rink all to ourselves? Well, long story short, Wonwoo slid across the ice, trying to block my shot from going in the empty net—since Jihoon wasn’t there either—and fell on his elbow,” Soonyoung explained.

“Didn’t you say before that this guy sprained his wrist?” Chan interrupted.

“Yeah, that’s the weirdest part. He said his elbow hurt, and after a bit, he couldn’t even hold his stick—which we really should have taken as a bad sign, but we’re not health majors so how could we know that he should have stopped practicing?” Soonyoung continued.

“You continued playing?!” Chan asked.

“He wasn’t dead or anything, and he was losing he couldn’t give up on the scrimmage,” Soonyoung explained.

“Literally anybody would have known something was wrong,” Seungkwan said, judging tone included.

“Excuse me? Where were you when this happened? Oh that’s right, you were still in high school pooping in your baby diapers. Now let me tell my story,” Soonyoung said, interrupting any backlash Seungkwan was trying to say. “Anyways, we found out he sprained his wrist when it still hurt like two weeks later. The funniest part was that exactly a month later, he sprained his wrist again when we went out to a stick-and-puck to celebrate his wrist being healed. What are the odds?” Soonyoung laughed.

“The odds are probably really high because his wrist wasn’t healed yet,” Seungkwan said under his breath.

“Be quiet, you weren’t even alive when this happened!” Soonyoung shouted back at him.

“I’m only two years younger than you! Two years!” Seungkwan shouted back.

 

And that’s when Chan should have learned that this team was going to be really weird and should have escaped while he still could. Because now he was stuck with said team, losing another game. Of course.

 Chan decided that in order for him to keep what was left of his life, he wouldn’t go near Jihoon. When you face 47 shots in a game, you probably don’t want to talk to the shitty team that let you face all those pucks. He only let 5 in though. Chan was impressed. Even though they lost. Poor Jihoon. If only he was on a team that was actually good. He’d probably get the recognition and the wins he deserved. Chan wondered if Jihoon ever got the chance to play on a successful team. He was good enough that he probably played hockey when he was young. Maybe he got to win games before coming to this school. Chan hoped so. Jihoon deserved it.

But back to more pressing matters, Chan’s leg was cut open and still bleeding, red seeping through the bandages. He probably had to get stitches. And he had to get someone to take him to the hospital. He could ask Soonyoung, but Vernon, Seungkwan, and Minghao would all have to come as well. And Chan didn’t feel like doing that to them. Even though Vernon and Seungkwan would probably enjoy dicking around in a hospital. All those wheelchairs to play with. Okay, Chan wasn’t going to let Vernon get hurt at the hospital. So he had to ask someone else. He could ask Wonwoo. But he was kind of scared of Wonwoo. And his car was even scarier. It probably wouldn’t even make it to the hospital. Did Jisoo have a car? How was he getting to the games? He probably did, right? He was an adult. Adults have cars. Chan probably felt most comfortable asking Seungcheol though. He was the most adult out of anyone on the team (dare Chan say Seungcheol was like a father-figure to him?). But what about Jihoon? Would Chan ruin his ride thing if he asked Seungcheol to take him to the hospital? How many seats did Seungcheol’s truck have? Maybe it was one of those old school ones with the three seats in the front. Chan figured it looked old enough to have three seats—the rust on the wheel-wells proved it. It couldn’t hurt to ask for a ride. Chan figured, it could. He could bleed out if nobody was able to take him. Chan forced the thought to the back of his mind. He couldn’t think like that. Not now.

Chan found Seungcheol talking to the other team’s coach in the lobby of the rink while most of the team was still in the locker room. He felt bad for interrupting them, but again, he was bleeding and maybe it was important. “Excuse me, coach? Can I ask you something?” Chan started. (Chan was probably the only player who still called Seungcheol coach. Seungcheol probably liked that.)

“Yeah, of course,” Seungcheol told him. “I’ll talk to you later,” he said to the opposing team’s coach before turning to Chan. “What’s up?”

“I need a ride to the hospital. My leg is still bleeding. I’d ask someone else, but I don’t know if anyone can,” Chan said.

“Oh yeah for sure. Are you okay? Is it an emergency? Should we go right now? Where’s your stuff?” Seungcheol started rambling nervously, eyes looking past Chan for his stuff.

“No, it’s fine, really! It’s not an emergency, but I should probably go soon,” Chan said, trying to calm him.

“Okay, let me find Jihoon and you can grab your stuff and we’ll go,” Seungcheol said.

Chan nodded and went off to find his gear back in the locker room. Chan told Soonyoung he was gonna catch a ride with Seungcheol, which made Soonyoung give him a confused look in response. Did everyone know about the unspoken deal with Seungcheol and Jihoon? (Or maybe Soonyoung was upset that Chan didn’t trust him enough to take him to the hospital when Soonyoung believed he was a great, qualified driver.) Chan felt bad that he was treading on the ride thing. But again, maybe it was emergency? Maybe.

Chan was amazed the team ever made it anywhere. There were definitely not enough vehicles to transport 13 people safely. Now that Chan thought about it, they never made it anywhere on time. Maybe because figuring out rides was such a hassle. It seemed like the people who lived together never seemed to be in the same car. Except for Seungkwan and Vernon—the two people who could probably use a break from each other.

Chan grabbed his stuff and headed back out into the lobby to see Seungcheol talking to Jihoon. Probably telling him that he couldn’t drive him home because he had to take some idiot freshman to the ER because he cut himself open during a game. The same idiot freshman who left the game so you could face 600 shots without his help. Chan was so mad at himself for making problems for everyone else. And just then, like some act of god (maybe an act of satan, rather), Jihoon glanced over at Chan, giving him one of those blank stares, but the kind of stare where you knew he was plotting your death, but didn’t have to think that hard about it. Chan could shit his pants from that kind of look. But it was only for a moment—thank god—and Jihoon went back to focusing on Seungcheol, nodding at something he said. It was one thing to have to play a shitty game, and now Jihoon lost his ride. He definitely was going to hire a hitman to come for Chan later. Chan knew he didn’t matter enough to Jihoon for Jihoon to actually kill Chan himself. Jihoon would hire someone else to do it, probably for like 5 bucks. That’s how little Jihoon cared about Chan. Chan shouldn’t have been thinking this in-depth about his own cruel demise.

But Chan learned later that the rides went okay. Jihoon probably got thrown in with Jeonghan and Jisoo—who did have an adult car. A weird little Prius that would cause them all to be uncomfortable because that car wouldn’t hold goalie pads and Jeonghan’s stuff as well. But don’t worry, Jisoo saved a lot of money on gas with that tiny, environmentally-friendly, safe car. Chan wondered if he should even go to the hospital after all because Jihoon was sure going to kill him anyways. But he already went through all this trouble. Might as well go get those stitches.

And Chan thought it was nice that Seungcheol did his whole worried dad act. It made Chan think about how much he would miss Seungcheol after Jihoon killed him (or rather, had someone else kill him).

Seungcheol sped all the way to the hospital. Maybe out of fear for Chan bleeding out on the seat of his truck. Or maybe for complete disregard for traffic laws. It really could have been either. But they got there in one piece so Chan figured it was okay (did Chan really count as being in one piece?). 

“Hello, what are you here for today?” the slightly annoyed nurse at the front desk of the emergency wing of the hospital asked the two of them, not looking up from some paperwork she was scribbling on with a pen with pink ink.

“Uh, I need to get stitches,” Chan managed to say.

“Okay, fill these forms out and bring them back up here when you’re done,” she told him, handing Chan a clipboard with a stack of colored papers asking for his entire life history, his parents’ life histories, and perhaps his grandparents’ life histories as well.

Chan sat down in the lobby, Seungcheol sitting next to him. He was on his phone, maybe texting Jihoon. Maybe Jihoon was explaining his plan to kill Chan later. Maybe Seungcheol was giving him advice on how to do it. But never mind, because Chan had to focus right now.

And after the 15 minutes it took to fill all those forms out, leg still bleeding, Chan handed them back to the nurse. She looked at the forms, and then back at him, and asked, “How old are you?”

“Seventeen,” Chan replied.

“Oh, you have to go to pediatrics if you’re under 18. Your brother can go with you. It’s down the hall to the right,” the nurse said.

“Oh, he’s not-” Chan started before Seungcheol grabbed him by the shoulder and escorted him down the hall, telling the woman a ‘thank you.’

And Chan had to fill out more forms. Leg still bleeding. Before being shown to a room. Which was the worst part of it all. Because Chan was shown to a room where the bed was modeled to represent a firetruck—for kids of course. Which maybe somebody else would have thought was cool. (Like maybe Soonyoung, or Mingyu.) But Chan was not enjoying himself. Especially because he had to sit in it with Seungcheol in the chair across from him. Chan didn’t care about the stitches. Sure, it hurt a little. But nothing hurt more than his pride, sitting in that horrid firetruck bed. And maybe Seungcheol getting mistaken for his brother. A lot of losses today for Chan.

 

When Chan showed Soonyoung the stitches at practice (well, when Soonyoung begged to see them) Chan left out the part about sitting in the firetruck bed. Chan didn’t think Seungcheol told anyone else about it either. Except for Jihoon maybe. Since Jihoon didn’t really speak to Chan, he had no clue what Jihoon knew. Maybe Seungcheol told Jihoon something important from watching him fill out all that paperwork at the hospital (twice!), like Chan’s social security number. Maybe Jihoon would use it to slowly ruin Chan’s life. Jihoon scared Chan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now u know everyone is bad at what they do
> 
> next chapter: jihoon uses chans social security number to ruin his credit score and his life  
> look forward to it
> 
> also all these injuries are based on true stories  
> i shit u not  
> i promise


	7. "Yeah, I think it was one of my best games. Seungcheol agreed."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team has their first away game and uses it to try to get closer.  
> Some getting closer than others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god  
> i dont have anything to say for this  
> chan is so small and scared all the time  
> jeonghan wonwoo and junhui are shitty people
> 
> and what else do u want from me

It was the first road trip of the year. The younger players were pretty excited to be crossing state lines without their parents for the first time, but the older players were pissed that they had to call off work to go lose some hockey games 5 hours away.

The team decided to drive out Friday night since their first game was early the next morning, and none of them wanted to think about having to wake up at the crack of dawn to play this game. Jeonghan almost felt bad Soonyoung was stuck driving the toddlers, but if Jeonghan was being honest, Soonyoung was probably just as excited as the younger players were to be on a road trip. Soonyoung was probably buying them gas station ICEE’s. Jeonghan could nearly picture Soonyoung daring Vernon to chug his in one go and Vernon getting blue raspberry brain freeze.

The team had to ask the school to get them a hotel because they had to play two games over the weekend, one Saturday morning and another one that night. While the younger players were excited that this trip was feigning some sort of summer camp vibe, the older players were annoyed they had to share beds since their school was cheap and tried to save some cash by renting less rooms, and less beds.

But as if the team had not just spent hours squished together in all too small cars, once they reached their hotel, someone recommended that they hang out in a shared room. Another person suggested they play a game in order to get to know each other better—which someone else argued that they didn’t need to play because they already knew each other well enough. Another person argued that they didn’t know Chan or Jisoo and playing games was always fun. Games like never-have-I-ever being one of them.

The team sat in a circle between two of the queen-size hotel beds, forming a half-moon on each one.

Once they were all settled in, Mingyu eyed Chan’s thigh exposed by his shorts and asked, “Woah Chan, nice scar. Is that from our first game?” pointing to Chan’s thigh.

“Yeah, the trainer said if I got stitches it wouldn’t scar as bad. But it’s still visible,” Chan said, poking his own leg.

“Jeonghan, where were you when this happened? Weren’t you supposed to give him life-saving treatment?” Seungkwan asked, turning towards Jeonghan who was barely paying attention to the boys, more interested in the game they were about to play.

“I’m the safety officer, not God,” Jeonghan said.

“Well, did you at least do that incident sheet we’re supposed to fill out every time someone gets hurt?” Seokmin asked.

“If I did one of those sheets every time someone got hurt playing, we’d fill the binder in one game,” Jeonghan replied.

“I would classify that as an incident the school probably should have known about,” Seokmin said.

“Let me rephrase—I am too lazy to fill out the incident sheets every time someone gets hurt,” Jeonghan groaned.

“Should we really have let Jeonghan be the safety officer?” Vernon asked.

“I feel like anyone who gives his teammates as much alcohol as Jeonghan does should not be in control of their safety,” Seungkwan added.

“Does anyone else know CPR?” Jeonghan asked, tone accusatory and sharp. “I didn’t think so,” he added after a moment.

“You just told us you basically hated being safety officer though,” Minghao stated.

“It looks good on my resume,” Jeonghan said. “Enough about of my inability to take care of you guys. Let’s finally play this game.” Clapping his hands together for effect, Jeonghan said, “First, we should establish some ground rules. Rule number one: no using specifics to single someone out. Rule number two: there are no rules,”

“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Seungcheol mumbled.

“It’ll help us get to know each other,” Junhui smiled, turning to face Seungcheol.

“I think I already know everything I need to about you guys. More than enough for some of you,” Seungcheol said, nearly grimacing.

“We hardly know anything about Chan though. Or Jisoo,” Seokmin said, oddly compliant with the game.

“I don’t think this is the way to learn about teammates,” Vernon said shyly, in a tone that made everyone think he had something to hide. Which only fueled everyone’s desire to play the game more.

“I vote we play on account that Vernon is hiding juicy secrets,” Wonwoo smiled.

“Then it’s settled. We’re playing,” Jeonghan said. “We can start simple and pure, just to get some basics down. I’ll start and we can go clockwise,” Jeonghan explained. “Alright, never have I ever… fucked Seungcheol,” Jeonghan said, eyeing Jihoon.

“You said no singling anybody out!” Seungcheol exclaimed.

“So you admit someone here has fucked you!” Jeonghan yelled back.

“God, I wish it was me,” Wonwoo said to himself.

“Throw that one out, we aren’t doing it. Seokmin you can go,” Seungcheol said, trying to change the subject.

“Alright!” Seokmin said, a little too cheerfully. “Never have I ever sat in Wonwoo’s garbage chair.” A statement that made Jeonghan, Wonwoo, Jihoon, Mingyu, Seungcheol, Soonyoung and Vernon put a finger down.

“What’s the garbage chair?” Jisoo asked.

“You already sat in it, buddy. Put a finger down,” Wonwoo said.

Looking horrified, Jisoo reluctantly put a finger down.

“Okay, my turn,” Seungkwan announced. “Never have I ever scored a goal.”

“We already know you suck. You should have picked something better,” Wonwoo scoffed.

Vernon looked happy to not have to put a finger down, same with Seungkwan.

 “It’s cute that you guys are celebrating your complete lack of skill,” Junhui said.

Jeonghan saw Chan eye Jihoon, brows furrowed probably trying to figure out how Jihoon scored a goal—from the goal. Jeonghan would tell him, but he didn’t want to mess up the flow of the game. And maybe he wanted Chan to think Jihoon was actually incredibly skilled instead of being incredibly lucky as to turn his clearing of the puck from their zone into a goal. Nobody expected that puck to slide straight down the ice under the opposing goalie’s feet—especially not the opposing team’s goalie. Jeonghan remembered the team trying to get Jihoon to do tequila shots after that game. Even though they lost, it wasn’t every day your goalie scored a goal—even if he didn’t mean for it to be a goal.

“Anyways, Minghao, your turn,” Junhui added. Minghao’s never-have-I-ever was bound to be good. Jeonghan and Junhui had been observing his interactions with Vernon since last year—they knew something had to be up between those two and now was the time to find out. 

“Hmm,” Minghao hummed for a moment before declaring, “Never have I ever played hockey before college.” To the disappointment of Jeonghan and Junhui, Minghao picked a boring fact. But again, Seungkwan and Vernon were excited to keep all their fingers up. Seokmin even got to keep a finger up. He was new to the sport too, joining his freshman year after having a class with Soonyoung.

 

It was Chem 100, and his lab partner was the kid who always came in looking like the dead, some caffeinated concoction in his hand every morning. It was a 9am class and Seokmin always wondered why Soonyoung was so tired. Sure it was early, but 9am wasn’t as horrible as Soonyoung made it seem to be. Maybe to make small-talk, or maybe to ease his worries about the kid he barely knew, Seokmin finally asked Soonyoung one morning if he was getting enough sleep.

“Oh, I don’t get back to my dorm from hockey practice until 2am. It sucks to have this class the morning after, but it was the only section that fit into my schedule,” Soonyoung replied, eyeing a beaker with more interest than any normal person would.

“Hockey practice? Like ice hockey? Our school has a team?” Seokmin asked.

“Yeah! You should come play with us. We need new players,” Soonyoung smiled, turning to Seokmin.

“That could be fun,” Seokmin said.

“It will be, I promise. Some goalie just joined too so we’re bound to do well this season. It’s the perfect time to learn if you’ve never played before,” Soonyoung explained.

And Seokmin did join the team, him and Soonyoung becoming quick friends after spending many nights together on the ice and in each other’s dorms working on finishing up their lab reports. It wasn’t long before Seokmin joined Soonyoung in coming to class with the largest coffee the school café sold.

 

“Stop punishing us for knowing how to play hockey and say something dirty,” Wonwoo whined.

“C’mon Vernon, confess something good,” Jeonghan said, eyeing the nervous boy.

“Uh,” Vernon stuttered. “Never have I ever…,” he began. It was obvious that he didn’t know what to say that conveyed experience while at the same time allowed him to confess that he had no experience at all. “Never have I ever…,” he continued again.

“C’mon man, you couldn’t have done everything,” Wonwoo groaned. “Or _have_ you?” he asked, with a mischievous grin.

“Okay, never have I ever… done meth,” Vernon uttered nervously.

It was silent for a moment, everyone staring at Vernon blankly.

“What? I haven’t,” Vernon defended himself.

“Yeah and neither has anybody else. You have to put a finger down if nobody has done your never-have-I-ever,” Jeonghan explained.

“That wasn’t in the rules,” Vernon whined.

“Because it’s a given. Or else we would just say weird shit nobody has ever done,” Jeonghan continued.

Vernon grumbled a “fine” and put a finger down.

“My turn?” Jisoo said, a little too excited. This was the moment of truth for Jeonghan—he had to see what kind of shit Jisoo had done—or not done. “Never have I ever smoked weed,” he smiled. _Laaaaame._

“Dude, have you been living under a rock?” Soonyoung asked, putting a finger down.

“I never had any friends back home who smoked,” Jisoo explained. Vernon, Minghao, Mingyu, Jeonghan, Jihoon, Junhui, Wonwoo, and Seungcheol all put fingers down as well.

“We have to change this, like, as soon as we get back,” Wonwoo chuckled. Jisoo’s expression didn’t waiver—he even seemed interested in the idea. Maybe he wasn’t as boring as Jeonghan thought.

“Do we really have to keep playing this?” Seungcheol sighed, as it was his turn.

“We have to know who the man coaching us is. How else can we trust you?” Mingyu said, oddly serious.

“I don’t think that’s how this works,” Seungcheol replied.

“C’mon coach,” Wonwoo egged him on. “Tell us about yourself.”

“You’re one of my closest friends, you know everything about me,” Seungcheol said.

“Not _everything,”_ Wonwoo grinned.

“Fuck. Fine. Uh, never have I ever broken a bone. There,” Seungcheol said, satisfied with himself for not giving away anything good.

“Is this just our bones or other peoples’ bones too?” Jihoon asked. Cue Chan’s eyes widening. Jeonghan thought it was almost cute that Chan was so scared of him. Jeonghan wondered if Soonyoung showed him that picture from the time they went to Target. Nobody could be scared of Jihoon if they saw the picture of him wearing all those coats at once.   

“Just your own,” Seungcheol sighed. Vernon, Chan, Mingyu, and Soonyoung put fingers down.

“Alright, for my never-have-I-ever, I will go with…never have I ever blacked out from drinking,” Wonwoo smiled.

“Can you black out from other things?” Chan asked, not meaning to say it aloud.

Jeonghan ruffled his hair, putting a finger down, joined by Junhui, Jihoon, Seungcheol, Soonyoung, Mingyu, Jisoo, and Seokmin.

“It astounds me how well you can hold your liquor given that you weigh about 95 pounds,” Seungcheol said.

“I’m actually 115 pounds of pure fucking steel,” Wonwoo defended himself.

“When did you ever black out?” Seungkwan asked Seokmin when he noticed him putting a finger down.

“The first time I went to Mingyu’s frat,” Seokmin replied.

“I remember that one!” Mingyu smiled. “That was a good party.”

“You drink?” Seungcheol asked Jisoo, not meaning to sound surprised, but that’s exactly how it sounded.

“Yeah, but it never ends well,” Jisoo chuckled. Jeonghan makes a mental note: Jisoo might actually be fun.

“Alright, the moment we’ve all been waiting for: Jihoon, what’s your dirty little secret?” Wonwoo asked, grabbing everyone’s attention from their conversations.

With a straight face, Jihoon said, “Never have I ever dated anyone.”

Jeonghan and Junhui turned towards Minghao and Vernon to keep track of any movement of digits. Both of them put a finger down. Junhui eyed Jeonghan just for a moment, with a barely noticeable smirk. They would have to have a meeting later—to discuss the terms of their betting pool again. (Being the wholesome, caring guys that they were, Jun and Jeonghan had been betting on Minghao and Vernon’s relationship for months. Trying to guess which one of them was going to make a move first. Wonwoo had to leave the betting pool; he lost too much money on his faith in Vernon to actually make a move a long time ago.) Joining the two boys, Jeonghan, Junhui, Seungcheol, Jisoo, Mingyu, and Wonwoo put fingers down.

 “Me?” Jun asked, looking around to make sure it’s his turn. “Never have I ever had a foursome.”

“Skipped right over threesome, huh?” Wonwoo chuckled.

“Well, I can safely say I’ve never been in a foursome,” Jun smiled.

“Okay, but neither has anyone else,” Seokmin stated.

“You guys are boring,” Jun said, sadly putting a finger of his own down.

“Please Mingyu, make this fun,” Jeonghan pleaded, looking to the boy.

“Okay, uh… never have I ever been with a dude,” Mingyu said.

“What do you mean by ‘been with?’ You totally made out with that guy at your frat,” Seungkwan told him.

“ _That_ was a good party,” Jeonghan reminisced.

“I mean like fucking. I’ve never fucked a dude,” Mingyu stated, oddly calm for such a personal announcement.

This was it. The moment of truth. And it was well worth the wait. Because along with Jeonghan, Seungcheol, Junhui, Jihoon, Soonyoung, Wonwoo, and Minghao, Jisoo also put a finger down. It was like winning the gay lottery for Jeonghan. He did notice that Vernon didn’t move though—what a shame (Junhui better pay up when this game was over). But again, Jisoo. He had to investigate the kid who they joked was straight when they first met him.

And suddenly Soonyoung was taking his turn. “That’s a tough one to follow up. But, uhm, I guess, never have I ever gotten a 4.0,” he said, causing Junhui, Seungcheol, and Jihoon to put down fingers.

“Shit, you’re smart?” Wonwoo asked Junhui.

“Yeah,” he chuckled in response.

“How do you find time to study between all those threesomes?” Wonwoo asked.

Just as Junhui was about to reply—probably willing to detail exactly how he does it—Jeonghan interrupted him and said, “Okay Chan, it’s your turn. Make it a good one because we don’t know anything about you. And you still have almost all your fingers left,” Jeonghan said, looking down at Chan’s hands.

“Alright,” Chan basically stammered. He was probably calculating how he would play this while not divulging anything personal while still appearing cool. “Never have I ever…,” he started, giving himself a little time to think. “Never have I ever completed a semester of college.”

Jeonghan smiled. Chan was boring. But cute.

“Dude,” Wonwoo began. “What a copout.”

“Leave him alone, he’s just a baby,” Soonyoung said, reaching over to cuddle Chan playfully in his arms. “I think it was a good turn. He got us all out.”

“I thought I was going to win,” Seungkwan said, finally putting a finger down.

“I don’t think you win never-have-I-ever by being the lamest one in the group,” Wonwoo added.

In the end, Jihoon ended up being the first one out, due to Jeonghan and Seungkwan naming weird sexual shit nobody else had done. Nobody knows when and where Jihoon had sex in public, but they all hoped it wasn’t anywhere they frequented.

And with the game ending, it was finally time to divide the shared beds. Soonyoung called to share a bed with his “baby” Chan, which made Wonwoo a little upset because he wanted to bed with Soonyoung, but had to choose Mingyu, whom he already saw enough of on the ice. Soonyoung and Chan were becoming quite the duo. Nobody would have thought they would be friends in the beginning—except for Soonyoung. It was a cute story. Heart-warming really.

 

It was one of the team’s first practices of the year and Soonyoung announced, “I think I need a protégé,” looking up at Wonwoo who was still focused on lacing his skates.

“Dude, I’m pretty sure the greatest gift you could give to a young person would be staying very far away from them,” Wonwoo replied with a grin, not looking up at him.

“C’mon, I’m a great mentor. Anyone would be lucky to be under my wing,” Soonyoung said.

“Alright, who are you gonna pick? I’d like to remind you that it’s a little too late to pick me,” Seokmin said, pulling his jersey over his head.

“No, I gotta go for the fresh meat,” Soonyoung said.

“Okay, well then it won’t be a hard choice as we only have one freshman this year,” Wonwoo said, looking up to see if Chan was around. He must have already been on the ice. He was always pretty quick to get out there. Wonwoo kind of envied his spirit. But was just too lazy and too apathetic to really change his ways. “If you’re still counting the sophomores as fresh meat, I think Vernon could use some real help,” he added.

“Vernon is safe in the capable hands of Minghao. Anyways, it’s pretty obvious that fate gave us Chan as the only freshman. He must be destined to be my sidekick,” Soonyoung announced.

“I’m sure that’s how it works,” Wonwoo chuckled.

“I know you think you’re hot shit because you already have a sidekick,” Soonyoung said.

“Mingyu? He’s not my sidekick. He’s my henchman. He’s useful to me. Watch this,” Wonwoo said before sitting up and looking around for said henchman. “Hey Mingyu!”

And, of course, Mingyu’s head appeared above the small crowd of boys. “Yeah?” he asked. He was kind of like a big dog. Probably a golden retriever if you had to assign him a breed. Only if you had to, of course.

“Can you tape my stick for me?” Wonwoo asked.

“Yeah, of course,” Mingyu replied, smiling with those shining canines.

Turning back towards Soonyoung, Wonwoo said, “See?”

“I mean, anyone would probably do that if you asked,” Seokmin said. “Hey Seungkwan, can you tape my stick for me?”

“Do it yourself,” Seungkwan shouted from the other side of the locker room.

“Hmm, maybe having a henchman would be nice,” Seokmin said, a little disheartened.

“Well, I’m not gonna treat Chan like that. We’re equals. Except for the part where I’m Batman and he’s Robin. But besides that. Equals,” Soonyoung said, throwing a jersey over his head, grabbing his helmet, and getting up to find Robin.

 

After half the practice was over, when Seungcheol finally gave the team a much-needed water break, Soonyoung slid next to Chan to try to engage in conversation. Like friends do, because they were friends.

“Hey, what’s up?” Soonyoung asked.

“Nothing much,” Chan said nervously. “Did you need something?”

“No! I just wanted to talk to you. You seem a little lonely.”

“Oh, it’s fine. I don’t think I’m lonely?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be your friend. You’ll look super cool if you have an older friend like me. It’ll make Seungkwan real jealous.”

“I really think it’s okay.”

“Okay, what about your other freshman friends? Everyone will want to talk to the kid who hangs out with seniors. They’ll be so jealous.”

“I don’t think-” Chan started.

“Alright, it’s settled then. I’m gonna take you under my wing. Do you have any older siblings?” Soonyoung asked.

“No, but-” Chan tried to explain.

“Great! I can be, like, your big brother then!” Soonyoung announced with a grin on his face.

“Thanks, I guess?” Chan said, putting his water bottle back on the boards.

“I’m super cool. I can tell you anything about anyone,” Soonyoung said. “Try me.”

“That’s really okay. I really don’t need any more information. Seungkwan told me a lot of stuff already,” Chan said.

“I know way more than he does. I’ve been here much longer. C’mon, what do you want to know? I have dirt on the whole team,” Soonyoung said, wrapping an arm around Chan’s shoulder, who tried to shrug it off but Soonyoung didn’t take the hint. “Ask your big brother anything you want to know.”

“There _is_ one thing,” Chan started, trying to not focus on the fact that Soonyoung had now taken the position of his faux older sibling.

“ _Ooo_ , what is it, my child?” Soonyoung said, practically beaming.

“What’s that one guy’s name? The tall brown-haired guy. You hang out with him sometimes,” Chan asked.

“I have all the information in the world—a plethora of knowledge—and you just want to know Seokmin’s name?” Soonyoung asked.

“Seokmin! Thanks a lot,” Chan said, trying to escape Soonyoung’s clutches.

Wonwoo skated up to where Soonyoung was left alone by the water bottles, “So how’s the Robin thing going?” he chuckled.

“It’s a work in progress. But he already likes me a lot. I can tell,” Soonyoung said.

 

Chan couldn’t seem to avoid Soonyoung’s affections, even now. And truthfully, he didn’t want to.

Seungkwan—claiming he was sick of seeing Vernon as much as he had to already—chose to share a bed with Seokmin. Which left Minghao sharing a bed with the unpopular Vernon, who got sweaty and nervous just thinking about sharing a bed with the boy who acted like it didn’t affect him at all to be so close.

Jihoon got his own bed of course, because he wasn’t risking any more sleep by sharing with anyone (truthfully, nobody wanted to share a bed with him—nobody wanted to end up dead). And anyways, Seungcheol always said that the team had to treat their goalie the best, because he worked harder than anyone else or something like that—which made Wonwoo gag. (Wonwoo knew Seungcheol only said that because he was totally fucking the goalie—he’d get hard evidence someday. And he would probably laugh if he heard you say “hard evidence.”)

Jeonghan was left to try to share a bed with Junhui, but he was known to have night terrors and kick in his sleep, which Jeonghan didn’t really want to get into. (As one of Jun’s best friends, Jeonghan could admit that Junhui was the kind of guy that if you saw him on the street, you’d think he was super cool. And he _was_ super cool, he just, wasn’t normal. Anyways, stories for later. Like the time he caught a bird with his bare hands in the men’s restroom. That was a good one.) Jeonghan spent a while in their room though, trying to get Jun to cough up the money he lost betting that Minghao had fucked Vernon by now. Jeonghan thought it was laughable that Jun would make such a stupid bet. There was no way on God’s green earth that those two had ever shared a bed together that wasn’t on a hockey trip. Jeonghan had good intuition for people’s personal matters. Which really wasn’t helpful in situations that didn’t involve betting on them.

When Jihoon kicked him out so he could try to get some sleep, Jeonghan wondered if Seungcheol would let him share his bed. They were the closest in age, and Jeonghan knew Seungcheol had a soft spot for him anyways, since he had been on the team the longest and everything, even playing together. With the shit they’d been through together freshman year, they had to stay close—even as Seungcheol graduated and Jeonghan stayed at the university. They had a good relationship. Seungcheol had to let Jeonghan share a bed with him, right? (Seungcheol still owed Jeonghan for nearly getting him fired anyways.)

So Jeonghan knocked on the door to Seungcheol’s room, which Jeonghan figured he was probably sharing with the other coach, Jisoo.

Seungcheol opened the door and his gaze softened when he saw it was just Jeonghan and not one of the younger players there to harass him. “What’s up?”

“The guys left me to try to share a bed with Jun,” Jeonghan started.

“Say no more,” Seungcheol stopped him. “Come in.”

“Thanks,” Jeonghan smiled. After entering the small room, he noticed Jisoo sitting on top of the bed opposite to Seungcheol’s, glasses resting on his nose and hair damp from a shower. His eyes were focused on the pages of a small paperback book before looking up to smile at Jeonghan’s presence. Jeonghan tried to tell himself he didn’t find that totally cute, when of course, he did. Jeonghan knew he wasn’t actually into Jisoo. He was just cute and all. That’s it. Really. He should tell Jisoo that one day.

 

Jeonghan’s relationship to Jisoo was a weird one. One that Wonwoo constantly shamed him for.

Much like the time Jeonghan was sitting on the couch, opposite from Wonwoo, scrolling through his phone. He announced to his roommate, “Hey, Jisoo invited me out to eat at that weird new restaurant we’ve all been avoiding.”

“Which one?” Wonwoo asked.

“The one that replaced that good take-out Chinese place,” Jeonghan told him, eyes finally meeting Wonwoo’s instead of his phone screen.

“Fuck that, you can’t go. That place is evil.”

“Just because you’ll never get that one delivery guy who brought us chocolate with our orders anymore doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy whatever new place is there.”

“It feels sacrilegious,” Wonwoo mumbled.

“The food wasn’t even that great.”

“I bet that new place won’t give you chocolates.”

“Doesn’t matter because Jisoo’s paying anyways.”

“Are you guys dating now or what?” Wonwoo asked.

“No, he isn’t even my type.”

“What? Not straight enough for you?” Wonwoo mocked him.

Jeonghan threw a pillow at Wonwoo’s head and said, “Shut up. We just don’t have a lot in common. Dating him would be torture. He likes kids and shit. He’s getting his Master’s in early childhood education or something,” Jeonghan whined.

“Ew, that is gross. So what’re you doing wasting your time on him?” Wonwoo replied.

“I’m just trying to be nice enough to him so he’ll put his mouth on my dick at some point,” Jeonghan responded.

“Isn’t that what dating means?” Wonwoo asked.

“Maybe…,” Jeonghan said, turning his attention back to his phone screen.

 

And as soon as Jeonghan convinced himself that he wasn’t really into Jisoo, it just got worse.

“So, are you gonna let me share a bed with you or what?” Jeonghan asked, turning back to Seungcheol.

“You can share with me,” Jisoo spoke up, “I promise I don’t snore or anything,” he added, smiling. Always smiling. Fuck him. Have some common decency for god’s sake. He was ruining Jeonghan’s plans of not liking him.

In order to show some manners (which he didn’t actually possess) Jeonghan just returned a smile and gave a small “thanks.”

Jisoo set the book he was reading down on the nightstand next to the bed and moved so Jeonghan could comfortably sit next to him on the bed.

“Okay, let’s get some rest. Jeonghan, I’m expecting you to play well tomorrow. It’s not like I can trust the others to do the same,” Seungcheol sighed before hitting the light switch and shuffling into his own bed.

Jeonghan was pretty nervous about being in such close proximity to Jisoo. The two had only been alone together when Jisoo invited him out to eat at weird restaurants that served organic tofu, and when Jisoo invited Jeonghan to come to the library and study with him. Yeah, Jisoo invaded his personal space in practice when he was trying to get Jeonghan’s feet in the right position so he could do backwards crossovers correctly, but in practice Jeonghan was covered in thick pads. Now, being so close to Jisoo with barely anything between them felt oddly intimate. In just soft flannel pajama bottoms and t-shirts worn thin from wear, Jeonghan wasn’t used to how close their bodies really were. He tried to scoot under the covers facing the wall away from Jisoo, because maybe if he wasn’t looking at Jisoo, he would calm down. But all he could think about was how nice Jisoo smelled out of the shower. And about how soft his skin might feel to the touch. About how his fingers might look wrapped around something other than a composite hockey stick.

No. Jeonghan had to think about how Jisoo liked kids. And how he only liked to shop at Whole Foods. And how Jisoo could only drink those shitty canned margaritas opposed to actual alcohol. That pissed Jeonghan off. His dumb Greek-yogurt-eating ass. They were _not_ compatible.

But it wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t long before Jeonghan heard the soft noises of Seungcheol’s breath as he exhaled in his sleep. He must have been more tired than anyone else. He had to work a full time job in addition to driving down here with the team. Jeonghan admired his dedication to this lousy team.

Jeonghan grew upset with Seungcheol being able to sleep so easily when Jeonghan was so uncomfortable. He wished he could fall asleep as easy as Seungcheol could. His mind was racing and felt too hot and too nervous under the thick blankets of the hotel bed. It didn’t help that the thoughts about the games they had tomorrow were racing through his head. He felt like he could hear his heartbeat against the pillow. Loud and angry. Honestly, why was he getting so worked up? It’s not like he liked Jisoo or anything. Really. He was just interested in Jisoo. About how Jisoo had apparently been with a guy. Maybe he’d want to be with Jeonghan too. From the amount of times they’d hung out, maybe that was Jisoo’s plan. Jeonghan hoped so.

He decided to just suck it up and turn over to face Jisoo. Jeonghan was surprised to see the reflection of dim light in Jisoo’s open eyes. Jeonghan’s eyes were still adjusting to the semi-darkness when he took in Jisoo’s soft features. The way Jisoo’s eyes always had a glimmer in them as if they were illuminated by stars, the soft curve of his lips that looked carved from marble. Jeonghan was doomed. He was totally infatuated with this guy he told himself he didn’t even really like. And the worst part was that Jisoo was smiling back at him.

With the placement of his finger to his lips signaling Jisoo to remain quiet, Jeonghan threw Wonwoo’s words about becoming like Jihoon out the window and slid out of the bed to motion Jisoo into following him to the bathroom in their shared room.

Maybe it wouldn’t mean anything. Jeonghan just wanted to know what it was like to touch Jisoo, to kiss him. They really didn’t have anything in common or anything. Jeonghan knew this. He just wanted to know what Jisoo’s lips tasted like. That’s all. Like, people can kiss and it can mean nothing. He knew Jun would agree (but he also knew using Jun as a moral compass was a shitty idea). Jeonghan assured himself it was totally normal and cool and okay. It was. People do this kinda shit all the time. Granted, it’s mostly when people are smashed at parties. But this is kinda like that. Except that they were both sober and they were in a hotel room, not a frat house. But, fuck it.

When Jisoo followed Jeonghan into the tiny bathroom, closing the door behind him, Jeonghan eyed him just for a moment before reaching his hand over to cup Jisoo’s face, thumb on his jawline, placing an experimental kiss to Jisoo’s lips. When he felt Jisoo lean into his hand, his touch, Jeonghan turned his head, ever so slightly, to coax Jisoo into deepening the kiss. Jeonghan took Jisoo’s bottom lip between his own, gently sucking on it, before using his tongue to quickly lick the spot where he worked, fist grabbing Jisoo’s soft t-shirt. When Jisoo allowed him, Jeonghan was able to lick into Jisoo’s mouth, feeling how warm he was. How soft he was. Jeonghan slid the hand that was on Jisoo’s jaw to his nape, fingers sliding through his hair, leg moving to part Jisoo’s.

Jeonghan pressed another soft kiss to Jisoo’s lips before moving so he could nip at Jisoo’s bared neck, the spot right under his jaw. Jeonghan could feel when Jisoo placed a free hand gently on Jeonghan’s hip bone, his thumb rubbing small circles into the newly exposed skin. Jeonghan pressed multiple quick pecks from his jawline to the dip above Jisoo’s collarbone, moving a free hand to play with the hem of Jisoo’s pants. When Jisoo moved to put his own hand on top of Jeonghan’s as encouragement, Jeonghan took Jisoo’s shoulder to position him to sit on the edge of the bathtub.

“So, you’ve done this before?” Jeonghan smiled, situating himself between Jisoo’s parted knees.

“What? Gotten head in a hotel bathroom?” Jisoo asked, lips curved upwards.

“No-” Jeonghan started, “Wait, _have_ you?”

Instead of answering, Jisoo just pulled Jeonghan back up to his lips by the collar of his shirt. Jeonghan took that as his cue to let his fingers slip underneath the waistband of Jisoo’s pants. Jeonghan tried to muffle Jisoo’s moans with his mouth on Jisoo’s. Jeonghan couldn’t have Seungcheol wake up. In hindsight, if Jeonghan didn’t want Seungcheol to wake up, he probably shouldn’t have been trying to give the kid he was sharing a room with a blowjob in the bathroom. But hindsight is 20/20 Jeonghan thinks.

 

Their game the next morning went well. They still lost, but not by much. Jeonghan played a great game. Seungcheol wanted to yell at him because he noticed the hickeys on Jisoo’s neck that weren’t there the night before. But if it helped Jeonghan play better, who was Seungcheol to make a fuss about them fucking around in their shared hotel room? Seungcheol really needed to set his priorities straight.

Anyways, compared to the shit that went down later that night after their second game, Jeonghan was the least of Seungcheol’s problems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha gay


	8. "Yeah, he's alright."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soonyoung may or may not have a concussion. Nobody can really tell. Except for Wonwoo maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if i hadnt fooled u in previous chapters that i dont have a good handle on grammar  
> this chapter should let u know
> 
> ok so this is the intro to the soonwoo relationship thing  
> kinda gay but not as gay as we all would hope for

During the team’s second game of the day, they hit a small bump in the road. The road being their game. And the small bump being the one Soonyoung just got on his head from being checked into the boards. Poor kid. Shouldn’t have turned his back to the game when he had the puck.

Seungcheol watched as Soonyoung fell to the ice comically. Everything he did had a unique dramatic flair. Even getting checked. But Seungcheol immediately noticed that something wasn’t right when Soonyoung didn’t get back up right away like he usually did. The ref blew the whistle—as the check was pretty illegal—and Seungcheol did his best to run across the ice to get to Soonyoung (well, as best as someone wearing tennis shoes could run across ice).

“Soonyoung, are you okay?” he asked, basically sliding into Soonyoung to stop himself.

“Yeah, I’m good,” he replied, not quite focusing on Seungcheol.

Jeonghan skated up to the two, getting on one knee to assess Soonyoung. “How’s your head? You took a pretty big fall just now.”

“It’s still there,” Soonyoung replied, turning to Jeonghan.

“Is it feeling okay?”

“It feels like my head,” Soonyoung said, hands reaching up to make sure his head was where it was supposed to be, and that it was his own head.

“I think he could have a concussion,” Jeonghan said to Seungcheol.

“It’s so hard to tell when he’s usually this weird,” Seungcheol sighed. “Soonyoung, look into my eyes,” he told him, trying to see if his pupils were the same size.

“That sounded kinda gay, man,” Soonyoung laughed, unable to focus on Seungcheol’s gaze.

“Do you know what day it is?” Jeonghan asked.

“It’s game day,” he replied.

“Fuck. I can’t even tell if this is weird for him,” Seungcheol said to Jeonghan.

“Let’s be on the safe side and take him out of the game. Vernon and Seungkwan can replace him.”

“Fuck,” Seungcheol sighed. “Yeah, alright. Can you help him get to the bench?” Seungcheol asked.

“Sure. C’mon Soonyoung, let’s go,” Jeonghan said, reaching to lift Soonyoung off the ice.

“Where are we going?” he asked.

“We’re going to go make sure you don’t die.”

“Cool.”

Seungcheol kept Soonyoung on the bench, not exactly telling him he was going to sit for the rest of the game, but not giving him any shifts either. Soonyoung was really too out of it to realize that waiting for his turn to play was taking up the entire rest of the third period. Which probably confirmed Seungcheol and Jeonghan’s fears of him being concussed.

They lost the game, of course. But Seungkwan and Vernon got some valuable ice time (not like they used it well or anything). Jihoon may have been a little distracted in the net worrying about if Soonyoung was okay (the downside of being goalie was that nobody told you shit that was happening on the other end of the ice). Overall, nobody was that interested in the score when Soonyoung could have been hurt.

 

The team headed out to grab dinner at some cliché burger place before heading home. The kind that was covered in checkered tiles and served overly-thick milkshakes.

Soonyoung didn’t really eat much, he only had a few of the fries Wonwoo tried to get him to eat, which worried Seungcheol to the point where he couldn’t eat much either. He should probably have Soonyoung go to a doctor. Jun was already driving his car for him since nobody trusted Soonyoung behind the wheel of a car at a time like this. Seungcheol wanted Jun to take him to one of those 24-hour clinics on their way home.

The problem was, when they left the restaurant to do just that, they were missing Soonyoung. The team had gathered where they parked the cars just up the street from the restaurant, all 12 of them. Wonwoo was the first to say anything.

“Where’s Soonyoung?” Wonwoo asked, looking around, not seeing Soonyoung by their cars.

“He told me he was going to go to the bathroom,” Vernon replied.

“And you left him alone?” Wonwoo asked (more like yelled).

“Yeah, he’s a grown-up, he can take care of himself,” Vernon defended himself.

“He has a concussion.”

“Oh,” Vernon said. “Really? I just thought he was high.”

“Fuck,” Wonwoo sighed. He began rushing down back towards the restaurant with Vernon (the one who Wonwoo blamed for Soonyoung missing) to see if Soonyoung was still there.

Of course Wonwoo was the one who noticed Soonyoung’s absence. And of course Wonwoo was the one who went to try to find him. They were close after all.

 

 

 

It was a Wednesday afternoon, Jeonghan was working at the library, and Wonwoo and Soonyoung were smoking in Wonwoo’s room.

For an August afternoon, it was just about perfect. The sunlight that illuminated the thick smoke in the air was hitting their skin, warming their bodies wherever it touched. Wonwoo would miss this feeling when winter rolled around.

Soonyoung was nestled on Wonwoo’s shoulder as they rested on his queen size mattress on the floor, passing a pipe between each other. Wonwoo didn’t bother buying a bed frame or anything. He only needed the mattress part really (Jeonghan told Wonwoo he looked like an ass without a bedframe, and Wonwoo told Jeonghan that he was fooled by capitalism by thinking he needed one). Soonyoung was blowing smoke out of his nostrils, eyes half-lidded, focused on his phone screen. Not anything on it in particular. But focused on the way the screen moved when he scrolled down pages, and back up again.

“Hey, what day is it?” Soonyoung asked, putting his phone down on his chest.

“Uh, 27?” Wonwoo replied, tilting his head to try to face Soonyoung.

“No, like the _day_!” Soonyoung said.

“Is it 28?” Wonwoo replied.

Soonyoung wanted to tell him that he meant the weekday, but thought to himself for a moment before responding, “ _Is_ it 28?”

“Why, what’s wrong?” Wonwoo asked, taking back the pipe from Soonyoung’s left hand.

“I feel like I have class,” Soonyoung said, eyes casted downwards at Wonwoo’s chest, trying to remember.

“Yeah, last week you had class,” Wonwoo said before sneaking his right arm out from under Soonyoung so he could press his lips to the pipe, lighter in the other hand.

“Why did you invite me over if you knew I had class?” Soonyoung asked.

“Dude, you asked to come over,” Wonwoo laughed, smoke escaping from his upturned lips.

“Damn, really?” Soonyoung sighed. “I’m my own worst enemy.”

“Would you really rather be in class?” Wonwoo asked, still grinning. He put the pipe and lighter on the floor next to the bed and let Soonyoung rest his head on his shoulder again.

“You know I wouldn’t. But like, I gotta graduate,” Soonyoung said.

“You can totally graduate. Just show up for the final. You know what they say: C’s get degrees,” Wonwoo started, lacing their fingers together, curiously looking at how Soonyoung’s hand fit in his own. “What kind of class is it anyways? Anything important?” he added, playing with Soonyoung’s hand.

“It’s my last one of those general required courses, some science class,” Soonyoung said, staring at the connection of their fingers.

“Shouldn’t you have finished those, like, sophomore year? So senioritis wouldn’t make you fail them?” Wonwoo joked with a chuckle.

“I figured the general education classes are so easy it’d be better for my senioritis to ruin them—instead of my major requirements,” Soonyoung explained, turning his head so he could focus on the ceiling now, condemning his choice to skip.

“I bet you could still make it. What time is the class?” Wonwoo asked.

With his free hand, Soonyoung grabbed his phone so he could see the clock on his lock screen. “It started 5 minutes ago,” he said with a sigh.

“You have tons of time!” Wonwoo exclaimed, sitting up with a jolt that forced Soonyoung up as well, disconnecting their hands.

“Okay, but it took me, like, 25 minutes just to walk to your place. Class will probably be half-over by the time I get there.”

Wonwoo thought for a moment, then turning so he could face Soonyoung properly, “We could bike there.”

“Don’t you only have one bike?”

“Yeah, but I have pegs. I can totally get you to class in ,like, 5 minutes. No problem.”

“Okay, what about the part where we’re stoned out of our minds?” Soonyoung laughed.

“No problem. I’ve completed much more difficult tasks while high compared to the simple act of riding a bike. Let’s finish this bowl off and we’ll go,” Wonwoo smiled, and reached for the lighter and pipe again.

Soonyoung watched him as he lit what was left under the ashes. Soonyoung felt a little hurt that Wonwoo was going to take such a big hit and not leave any for him, but just as he started feeling disappointed, Wonwoo leaned over into Soonyoung’s lap, grabbed the collar of his shirt, and pressed their lips together, exhaling smoke into his mouth. The act lost all of its intimacy between two stoned friends. The cuddling, the hand-holding, the kisses—these were all signs of affection, but not in the romantic sense. But rather, in the trusting sense. Sharing a high like this was the same as best friends sharing a bed during a sleepover. That’s what Soonyoung figured anyways.

“Sharing is caring,” Wonwoo said with a smile when he parted their lips. “ _Fuuuuuck,_ okay let’s go now before that hits me.”

 

And Wonwoo trying to ride a bike while high with Soonyoung’s weight on the pegs went just as well as anyone would have thought it would. Wonwoo basically got them out of the apartment complex’s driveway, and then crashed on the tree-lawn a few yards from the building.

“You know what, I think I’m too high for this,” Wonwoo laughed on his back in the grass.

“Me too,” Soonyoung grumbled, face-down in the patch of grass. He rolled over onto his back and said, “I was probably too high to go to class anyways.”

“What do you wanna do now?” Wonwoo asked, not making any effort to get up.

“Ugh, I’m pretty tired. Kinda want to take a nap,” Soonyoung said, “And then when I wake up, I want Jeonghan to make me food.”

“Are you reading my fucking mind?” Wonwoo laughed. “Honestly, I can’t even get up.”

“Are we gonna nap right here? In front of your apartment building?” Soonyoung asked.

“I live here. I should be allowed to pass out in my own tree-lawn. I pay rent,” Wonwoo said, eyes closed, already falling asleep.

“That’s so true,” Soonyoung said, following suit.

 

And the two woke up to Jeonghan finding them in front of their apartment building. Jeonghan seeing the fallen bike, Wonwoo’s scraped knee, and Soonyoung’s bloody elbows, he was able to put the pieces together pretty quickly of what took place.

“Didn’t you have class today, Soonyoung?” Jeonghan asked.

“Hm?” he replied, body not ready to enter the world of the living just yet. “What day is today?”

“Wednesday,” Jeonghan said, arms crossed over his chest.

“What time is it?”

“7pm.”

“Oh yeah, I totally had class today,” Soonyoung said.

“So should I asked why you are passed out in front of my apartment?”

Wonwoo jolted awake, announcing, “I tried to get him to campus!”

Jeonghan released a sigh, like a frustrated parent. The kind where they say ‘I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.’ That’s Jeonghan. “Do you guys want dinner?”

“Please,” Wonwoo said, falling back on the ground.

“Okay, grab your shitty bike and let’s go inside,” Jeonghan said, turning his back to his two pathetic kids. “I’ll get the band-aids for you and order a pizza.”

“I love you so much,” Soonyoung said.

 

 

 

When Wonwoo didn’t see Soonyoung near the restaurant, he reluctantly pulled out his phone to dial Seungcheol’s number. “Hey man, have you seen Soonyoung?”

“Not since we were at the restaurant. He was supposed to be with you guys.”

“Okay, just checking,” Wonwoo said.

“Where did you guys run off to?”

“Uh, nowhere.”

“Did you guys lose Soonyoung?” Seungcheol asked, voice raising.

“…No,” Wonwoo stammered.

“Where is he?” Seungcheol asked, nearly shouting.

“Uhh, you’re breaking up on me, _chhhhhhhhh,”_ Wonwoo was making those weird noises that sounded like static, but everyone knew wasn’t actually static. “Call you back _chhhhhhhhh_ when we get a better _chhhhhhh_ connection,” and Wonwoo hung up the phone. Turning back towards Vernon he said, “Okay we have about 5 minutes to find Soonyoung before Seungcheol kicks our asses.”

“I’ll go look in the bathroom. He might still be there. Like, playing in the sink or whatever shit he’s usually doing,” Vernon said before leaving Wonwoo standing on the corner.

“I’m gonna see if I can call him,” Wonwoo said before pulling up Soonyoung’s contact. It rang four times, went to voicemail. It rang another four times, voicemail again. “Fuck, he’s not picking up.” Another call and finally, Soonyoung’s voice. “Soonyoung!”

“Hey, where are you guys?” he replied calmly.

“We all went to the cars, where did you go?” Wonwoo asked.

“Where I thought the car was. I’ve been walking forever and can’t find it.”

“We parked on the street right in front of the restaurant. You were supposed to just walk forward.”

“Oh,” a pause. “I didn’t do that.”

“Yeah, that much is obvious,” Wonwoo said, he almost wanted to chuckle if he wasn’t shitting his pants about losing Soonyoung. “Where are you? Me and Vernon went back to the restaurant to find you.”

“I’m by the stores.”

“There’s stores everywhere. Which way did you go outside of the restaurant?”

“…I forgot.”

“Fuck,” Wonwoo murmured to himself away from his phone. Thinking quickly, Wonwoo asked, “Okay, what are the street numbers where you are?”

“Some people invited me to go in their basement for a party,” Soonyoung replied. Wonwoo could hear hushed voices of strangers from Soonyoung’s end.

“Don’t go! What are the numbers of their building?”

“Uh, 1245.”

“Okay, now walk forward, and tell me the next number.”

“1249.”

Wonwoo looked around, the numbers to his left were smaller, meaning Soonyoung had walked to his right. “Just stay there, I’m coming to get you.”

“Did you want to go to this party?”

“NO!”

Wonwoo found Soonyoung with a phone up to his ear, looking around at all the buildings.

“Soonyoung!” Wonwoo shouted once he saw him.

“Wonwoo? Where are you?” Soonyoung said into his cellphone.

Wonwoo finally made it to Soonyoung where he grabbed his phone from his hand and said, “Right here, you idiot.” There was a smile on his face, happy he found Soonyoung safe.

“The cell service is wild in this city,” Soonyoung said, amazed Wonwoo was in front of him.

“C’mon, we have to go home,” Wonwoo said, holding Soonyoung’s phone in one hand and Soonyoung’s hand in the other, scared to lose him again. With Soonyoung’s phone, Wonwoo called Vernon.

“Soonyoung? Everyone’s looking for you! Well, not Seungcheol—he’s more looking for Wonwoo who’s looking for you-” Vernon rambled until Wonwoo cut him off.

“Dude, it’s me. I found him. Get back to the cars and convince everyone we didn’t lose a team member.”

“Can do,” he replied before hanging up.

“If anyone asks, you were in the bathroom the whole time,” Wonwoo said to Soonyoung.

“Who’s gonna ask?”

“Seungcheol probably.”

“What do I tell him?”

“That you were in the bathroom.”

“Why?”

“Because we lost you and Seungcheol is gonna kill us.”

“But I was in the bathroom the whole time.”

“Damn right you were.”

Wonwoo brought Soonyoung to where the team’s cars were parked, the team members standing outside of them waiting to leave.

“Here he is. Nothing to worry about,” Wonwoo said, a little triumphantly.

“Good, like two of us were worried,” Jeonghan smiled.

“Finally,” Seungkwan sighed. “Let’s go home now. I’m tired.”

“Not yet,” Wonwoo said. “Jun has to take Soonyoung to a hospital. Make sure he’s not, like, dying or anything.”

“Of course,” Jun said, taking Soonyoung from Wonwoo’s grip.

 “Where was he?” Seungcheol asked.

“In the bathroom,” Soonyoung said.

“What were you doing in the bathroom for 10 minutes?”

“I don’t know, that’s what Wonwoo told me to say.”

“You didn’t stick to the plan,” Wonwoo grumbled.

 

The night ended with Jun driving Soonyoung’s car to the hospital so Soonyoung could get checked out. Minghao, Vernon, and Seungkwan all tagged along because that was their ride home. Minghao filmed as Vernon and Seungkwan had a wheelchair race down a nearly empty hallway. It was nearly empty because when a nurse appeared out of a patient’s room, Vernon had to steer his chair into Seungkwan’s to avoid hitting her. Minghao recorded the collision on his phone and sent it to nearly everyone on the team. Chan got the video from Minghao from the safety of Wonwoo’s car, since Jun replaced him in Soonyoung’s. Maybe it was a good thing he got replaced, he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to talk Vernon and Seungkwan out of whatever the fuck they were doing at the hospital.

And good thing they decided to fuck around at a hospital, and not like a back alley or anything, because it was easy for Vernon to see a doctor after crashing his wheelchair into Seungkwan’s. Just some scrapes and bruises, he would be fine. Soonyoung was okay though, but nobody really asked. He only had a minor concussion. Jun texted Wonwoo the news as soon as the doctor finished with Soonyoung (who then had to examine Vernon next). Wonwoo was thankful that only a few days of relaxing and Soonyoung would be back to normal. Well, maybe not normal, but back to whatever Soonyoung usually was.

 

 

 

Wonwoo and Soonyoung had been friends since their freshman year. Weirdly enough, they didn’t meet playing hockey. They met about a month before. With Wonwoo’s work-study assigning him to work in the school’s café and Soonyoung’s inability to function before noon without caffeine, the two were destined to meet.

Wonwoo thought he’d hit the jackpot when he didn’t have any classes scheduled before noon, but he didn’t realize that it meant that the café would schedule him 7am to noon—the worst shift offered as it entailed trying to satiate all of the grumpy college students’ caffeine needs before their 8am classes.

Within Wonwoo’s first week working at the school’s café, he noticed that the same boy frequented the café every day, ordering the same drink every day. It would be impossible for Wonwoo to forget this kid who ordered a large black coffee with two shots of espresso.

He learned his name when he was swiping the kid’s student ID card when he paid. Soonyoung. Soonyoung, the kid who probably should not be alive after what he put his body through on a daily basis. Wonwoo would remember.

 

And Wonwoo _did_ remember when he saw the kid at his first hockey practice with the team a week or so into the semester. He looked a lot more awake at 11pm. And Wonwoo didn’t mind that practice was at 11pm. He preferred it actually. He spent 4 years of high school waking up at 4:30am for morning practices before school. Night practices were a blessing. Because who honestly goes to bed before 2am anyways?

In the locker room, the team did little self-introductions, saying their name, their year, and how much experience they had. The returning players didn’t exert too much effort on the exercise—and why should they? They knew everyone already. The first freshman to introduce himself was a guy named Junhui—he said that people could call him Jun. He had been playing for a while—when he was still young. Maybe it was his intention—maybe not—but Junhui was a little intimidating. It was his air of nonchalance that made him intimidating. He could have told the team that he killed a man in that relaxed voice of his, and it would have given Wonwoo the same impression of Junhui as his self-introduction did.

The next freshman to introduce themselves was Soonyoung. Wonwoo felt weird that he remembered Soonyoung from the café. Would Soonyoung remember him too? The kid who poured his coffee every morning? Well, like Wonwoo, Soonyoung had started playing in high school. And his introduction was a stark contrast from Junhui’s—the kid’s smile made you feel so at ease. It seemed like he would get along well with everyone.

When Wonwoo introduced himself, Soonyoung gave him his full attention, perhaps not realizing that they had met before. It made Wonwoo feel a little bad. He couldn’t pin-point exactly why. Maybe for self-esteem reasons. How did Wonwoo remember this kid—his name too—when the kid didn’t even recognize him at all? How boring must Wonwoo be? He felt like he was in middle school again.

 

When the next morning came around, Wonwoo having a large cup of black coffee himself, Soonyoung rolled into the café, the same time as he usually did. Soonyoung looked a little more deceased than he usually did, but so did Wonwoo.

When Soonyoung got to the counter, Wonwoo asked, “Same thing as always?” with a small smile.

“Yeah,” Soonyoung managed to say while basically flopping his tired body onto the counter. “Would it be possible to add, like, one more shot of espresso?”

“It’d be possible, but I feel like you’re edging closer to death every time you come in.”

“I feel dead already, what’s another shot of espresso?” Soonyoung laughed. He raised his head from the counter and stared at Wonwoo while he swiped his ID card, eyes scrutinizing his face. “You look really familiar.”

“I make your coffee almost every day,” Wonwoo laughed.

“No, I mean. Where else have I seen you?” Soonyoung asked, directed more at himself than Wonwoo.

Wonwoo felt weird. Was it weird that he could remember Soonyoung—couldn’t forget him rather? Why didn’t Soonyoung recognize him?

“Did you go to hockey practice last night? For the school team?” Soonyoung asked.

“Yeah, I was there. Did you go too?” Wonwoo asked, not trying to be weird because he was positive that Soonyoung was there. It would be awkward to admit he recognized Soonyoung immediately and didn’t say anything.

“Yeah! That’s why you’re so familiar. So did you play before or what?” Soonyoung asked smiling.

The other students were getting a little aggravated that Wonwoo was taking such a long time with one customer. They were all dying here, they didn’t have time for some kid getting special treatment.

“Yeah, I played in high school, you?” Wonwoo asked, putting the lid on Soonyoung’s caffeine bomb. He already knew the answer to the question. He heard it last night before practice. But he wanted to act chill, and not like he remembered everything Soonyoung said last night.

“Same!” Soonyoung smiled. “Well, I guess I’ll see you again for practice.”

“I’ll be here, same time tomorrow to make your coffee again if you need it.”

“I guess that too,” he smiled, grabbing his coffee and heading out.

Wonwoo didn’t know what it was about Soonyoung that he was so drawn to. Maybe it was his bright smile, or contagious laugh, or maybe it was his close relationship with death that Wonwoo envied (that was usually the makings for a good friendship). Wonwoo wanted to know more about him. He was interested in him. Wonwoo had something akin to a friend-crush on this kid, like when you wanna be friends with someone so bad. That’s what it felt like.

It wouldn’t be until much later when Wonwoo would realize that his friend-crush was actually more of a real crush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes i think about promoting my twitter here  
> but then i think that if i want any of you to take me seriously you should never see my twitter  
> if you already know it  
> power to you
> 
> anyways i hope you enjoyed this  
> if you didnt  
> me neither i couldnt figure out how to write this


	9. "Yeah, they've been really nice to me. I wish you could come meet them."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeonghan's whining, Soonyoung's crossfaded, Jihoon's absent, and Chan's terrified.  
> Nothing's changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> literally i need to do homework what the fuck am i doing  
> anyways  
> here they are  
> in all of their trashy glory

“The only person who wished me happy birthday last year was the guy at the liquor store,” Jeonghan whined, fumbling with the straps on his elbow pads.

Chan knit his eyebrows together, looking at Jeonghan from the corner of his eye. Chan got in the habit of taking a longer time to dress in the locker room; it was his only way of catching up on all the team gossip. But Chan was a little puzzled at Jeonghan’s comment. Today was his birthday, his 21st birthday, what Jeonghan he doing at a liquor store last year?

“Why do you hold that against us? Of course we weren’t gonna wish you a happy birthday when it wasn’t your actual birthday? Nobody observes fake ID birthdays,” Wonwoo groaned, not even bothering to look up from where he was knotting his laces.

“You haven’t even told me happy birthday today yet,” Jeonghan added.

“Happy birthday, you piece of shit,” Wonwoo smirked, finally meeting Jeonghan’s gaze.

“So we’re gonna celebrate Friday, right?” Junhui asked, “with legally-bought alcohol?” he added a moment later.

“Yeah, everyone can come over, probably after 8 or something when I’m done with my shift at the library. And I mean _everyone—_ you better show, Jihoon,” Jeonghan said.

Jihoon acted like he didn’t hear him—which was basically what he did towards everyone in the locker room. Chan had seen him talk to Soonyoung during practices and games between whistles. He thought it was a little weird. A guy like Soonyoung being able to get close to Jihoon. Now that he thought about it, Soonyoung was pretty good at getting along with everybody—he’s the one who first tried to befriend Chan after all.

Chan wasn’t sure if he was included in the _everyone_. Of course, he was part of the team, but he felt like he wasn’t quite accepted into their social events yet. He’d only known them for about a month now. It felt odd to be considered part of the group. Even if he had been around since the first practice, Wonwoo throwing up on Jisoo, Jeonghan’s team party which seemed to be just a ploy to get Vernon to say funny things while high, Seungcheol taking him to the hospital, basically everyone else going to the hospital, their first scrimmage, their first game—Chan had really been through so much with the team. But yet, he still felt like an outsider, watching from the sidelines.

“You’re gonna go, right?” Vernon asked Chan, pulling him from his thoughts.

Looking a little surprised but expression quickly softening, Chan replied, “Yeah.”

Vernon smiled in response, breathing out a quiet “cool,” while he threw a jersey over his head, asking Chan to help him pull it over his shoulder pads.

 

Maybe it was because Chan was by himself, looking a little lost in the small crowd of people—only recognizing some of his teammates conversing with people he didn’t know, losing the sophomores shortly into the party when Wonwoo invited Minghao and Vernon to smoke and Seungkwan ditching, complaining it would mess up his made-up asthma, that Soonyoung decided to stand next to Chan in the kitchen and chat him up.

With one of those stereotypical red SOLO cups in his hand, which Chan was amazed existed outside of feel-good movies about college and eyes heavy-lidded and red, “Wanna see a picture?” Soonyoung asked, trying to speak above the music. Now, there’s many ways this could have gone. Chan really had no idea what Soonyoung was about to show him. He barely knew Soonyoung really. He wasn’t sure he _did_ want to see whatever was on Soonyoung’s phone. But before Chan could refuse, Soonyoung pulled up a picture of Jihoon in what looked like a department store. “This is Jihoon,” Soonyoung started. Normal enough. Chan didn’t know where this was going. “Now this is Jihoon with nine coats on,” Soonyoung added, swiping to another picture of Jihoon, same department store, but obviously now, with nine coats on.

It was hard to convince yourself Jihoon was terrifying when you saw a picture of him wearing all of those coats. Maybe that was Soonyoung’s plan. Maybe Soonyoung knew Chan avoided Jihoon when really Jihoon wasn’t even that scary. Chan figured he was just bad with words. And people. And a lot of other things.

 

 

Unlike Chan, Soonyoung had known Jihoon for a while now, since Jihoon was a freshman who came out to join their team. As much as Soonyoung liked to act like a complete goof, he had a really good sense for reading people. And when he met Jihoon for the first time, observed his reaction to the rest of the team, Soonyoung knew he had to make sure Jihoon was comfortable and could fit in—just as he did with Chan. Soonyoung had a talent for making everyone feel welcome. And he worked hard to make sure they did.

As much as Soonyoung loved to joke with Wonwoo and Jun, it was different with Jihoon. Sure, he still goofed off, but Soonyoung had to time it carefully. He learned Jihoon could only take so much interaction until he closed himself off. Soonyoung spent many practices, games, and team get-togethers learning just how much space Jihoon needed.

And it wasn’t like Jihoon didn’t like to joke around—he did. It was obvious from the nights spent in Soonyoung’s dorm Jihoon’s freshman year, coming over with the premise of doing schoolwork but ended with them raiding the school store for something to eat, and then getting sick because they tried to make wings in the microwave because they didn’t feel like trying to use the oven in the common room. (Jihoon avoided the common room ever since Soonyoung stole the metal mesh-wiring from the oven vent to try to fix his bong.)

The two often laid on the floor, sharing music or stories, laughing at each other, unfinished homework crumpled under their tired bodies.

Soonyoung had a special relationship with Jihoon—one nobody else on the team bothered to try to form. Most people who joined the team passed Jihoon off as the moody kid who didn’t talk much, and Soonyoung was glad he wasn’t one of them. He cherished his friendship with Jihoon—even if nobody else really knew about it.

Jihoon was the kind of friend who was always up to going to Target at weird hours and putting on a shit ton of coats for fun, and getting kicked out when Soonyoung drove one of those cars made for children into a display of soccer balls, sending them everywhere. Jihoon was the kind of friend who was always up for going to IHOP at 2 in the morning after practice, not caring about looking disgusting in public.

 

“What are you gonna get?” Soonyoung asked, stealing sips from the glass of water their waiter brought them. His hair was damp with sweat from practice.

“Probably what I always get,” Jihoon mumbled behind his menu. He was wearing a hoodie, one that was too big for him and covered his entire hands save for his fingertips that held the menu in front of him. Entirely too big hood pulled over his head, Jihoon replied, “You?”

“What if I got, like, every appetizer they offer? That’s how I’m feeling right now,” Soonyoung replied, laying his own menu down on the table in front of him.

“I’ll split it with you.”

“This is why we’re friends,” Soonyoung said with a smile.

And 35 minutes later, Soonyoung and Jihoon had ingested more appetizers than any human should in one night—or even one week. The best time to go to IHOP and order every appetizer on the menu was 2 am because nobody was sober enough to pay attention to the two gross-looking kids appearing absolutely ill in a booth together.

“I might be dying,” Jihoon said, laying down in the booth across from Soonyoung. He had the hood of his sweatshirt pulled over his face now.

“I think this was our best plan yet, but also I may need to go to the hospital,” Soonyoung said, forehead resting on his folded arms on the table. Jihoon could hear the smile in his voice.

“Have you ever had a plan that didn’t land you in the hospital,” Jihoon laughed, painfully.

“Enough about me and my poor decisions. What about yours?” Soonyoung asked, trying to look up from the table, but Jihoon wasn’t even visible in the booth across from him.

Jihoon released a groan. From all the mozzarella sticks in his stomach starting to protest or from the thought of having to talk about his own life, Soonyoung couldn’t tell.

“The more it goes on, the more I hate myself,” Jihoon grumbled.

“We all hate ourselves for one thing or another,” Soonyoung said, trying to be as serious as possible when it felt like he was going to shit out his stomach.

“You know I normally don’t give a shit about being an asshole. But with him, it’s starting to fuck with me. I just feel like I’m using him.”

“Are you?”

“Maybe. I can’t tell how I feel.”

“Well, you know how he feels.”

“Yeah, that’s the worst part.”

 

 

“Why are you showing me this?” Chan asked.

“Because they’re my favorite pictures of Jihoon,” Soonyoung responded, slurring the last syllables just slightly.

“No, I mean, why are you showing me pictures of Jihoon at all?”

“I don’t know. You kind of remind me of him.”

“Because we’re both short?”

“No—well, now that you mention it…,” Soonyoung added thoughtfully. “You just looked a little lonely.”

“You always say that to me,” Chan grumbled.

“Then stop looking so lonely. Why don’t you come talk to us? A few of us are hanging in Wonwoo’s room. C’mon,” Soonyoung said, grabbing Chan’s hand with his own free one, weaving through the crowd to get back to the bedrooms.

“Did you miss me?” Soonyoung said once he reached the doorway to Wonwoo’s room, dramatically posing in the doorframe.

“You left?” Seokmin asked.

Mingyu’s comment, “I noticed you left, man,” quickly put an end to Soonyoung’s pouting.

“You found Chan?” Wonwoo asked, packing another bowl.

“Yeah, he looked a little lost with all Jeonghan’s university friends. So I figured he might as well come be anti-social with us,” Soonyoung said, putting his cup on the floor and joining Wonwoo on his bed, leaving Chan to stand awkwardly in the doorway.

“Where’s the sophomores? I thought you guys would be together,” Wonwoo said.

“I thought Minghao and Vernon were with you,” Chan replied.

“Nah, Vernon had like 3 hits and started freaking out over the sound of the sound waves in his ears and Minghao had to calm him down. I don’t know where they went off to. I figured they’d found you.”

“So, what were you guys talking about?” Seokmin asked, a cup filled with some pale golden liquid in his hand. Probably wine Chan figured. Seokmin was probably classy enough to drink white wine at a party. And he was only taking casual sips from it—not throwing back whatever mystery concoction Mingyu was currently inhaling.

“Chan was telling me how scared of Jihoon he is,” Soonyoung laughed, resting his head in Wonwoo’s crossed legs.

“That’s not—”Chan stammered.

“Everyone thinks he’s kinda scary at first,” Mingyu tried explaining. “But he’s the one who actually found my cat—well, I was with him. We were getting some food off campus when he saw her, hiding behind some garbage can. As much as he sucks with people, the cat came up to him pretty quickly. He didn’t know what she was doing and was kind of freaked out when she started rubbing on his legs. To this day, he still hates when she rubs on his legs—he thinks it’s ‘suspicious.’”

“So you guys stole someone’s cat?” Chan asked. Wonwoo burst out in laughter, causing Soonyoung to bounce off his boney frame.

“We didn’t _steal_ the cat. She didn’t have a home. She was thin and wanted to come with us. She followed us all the way to the restaurant. Jihoon offered to go buy our food take-out so we could share some with her. I stayed with her outside the restaurant, and she crawled right in my lap. We knew we couldn’t take her back to campus, so we brought her here actually,” Mingyu continued to explain.

“Yeah, and Jeonghan threw an absolute fit,” Wonwoo chuckled.

“You did too once she peed in your bed,” Seokmin added.

“And that’s when our love-hate relationship all began,” Wonwoo said playfully as he was reminiscing the horror of trying to deep clean his mattress with a Tide-To-Go stick. (They since bought proper cleaning supplies because Wonwoo smelled like cat piss for a full 3 days until Jeonghan forced him to clean his mattress with real soap.)

Chan grimaced seeing Wonwoo and Soonyoung on the cat piss mattress. No wonder Seokmin was sitting at Wonwoo’s desk, and Mingyu on the floor. Chan didn’t trust Wonwoo enough to sit on any fabric-covered surface in his room (or in the whole house. He remembers the story of the garbage chair.)

“And now she lives with me and Jun,” Soonyoung started and then with sudden urgency stated, “Oh my god, we left her home alone!”

Junhui seemed to appear suddenly (out of Wonwoo’s closet?) with a drink in hand to say, “Don’t worry, I left her the number of the 911 in case she’s in trouble.”

“You’re a much better parent than I am. Thank god,” Soonyoung sighed, getting comfortable on Wonwoo’s lap again.

Letting Junhui waltz over to Wonwoo’s bed to throw himself on the free space Wonwoo and Soonyoung weren’t occupying, Chan asked, “So you guys were already living together your sophomore year when they got the cat?”

“They didn’t steal the cat their freshman year, it was when me and Soonyoung were juniors that we secured our apartment,” Junhui explained as Mingyu was whining that he didn’t steal a cat. “But we actually have been roommates since our freshman year. Soonyoung’s the main reason I decided to join the team here. I wasn’t gonna play in college, but Soonyoung convinced me to come to the first practice.”

“We really clicked freshman year,” Soonyoung explained.

“I did go through a period freshman year where I thought you had died though,” Junhui said.

“Sorry, when I fell down those stairs, I also dropped my phone so I couldn’t text you while I was in the hospital,” Soonyoung replied.

Chan knitted his eyebrows together in confusion. Soonyoung must have noticed this and further explained the story. “Around March freshman year, I was at some party, like, absolutely trashed. Jun stayed home to study for midterms because he’s an excellent student or something. Anyways, I fell down some stairs at the house and broke 3 ribs. I had to go to the hospital for like 3 or 4 days. They asked what happened and I said I slipped on some ice on the sidewalk. I’m pretty sure me puking in the waiting room didn’t help my story though. I couldn’t contact Jun the whole time I was there, but I assumed he just thought I was at the best rager ever—which it kind of was. Luckily I was able to come home and we sold my painkillers for weed money. And we’ve been best bros ever since.”

“Besides smoking weed and drinking, what did you two even have in common freshman year?” Wonwoo chuckled.

“We both liked smoking weed and drinking with each other,” Junhui answered.

“And here we are, 20 years later still keeping at it,” Soonyoung explained.

Chan had to resist the urge to correct Soonyoung. You had to let him say dumb shit every so often so it didn’t store up into one big shit story. (That sounds really bad. But Soonyoung does have some stories involving a lot of shit. Don’t ask him about it over dinner.)

“Soonyoung was the one who convinced me to join the team too. He’s like the team’s PR guy or something,” Seokmin said, taking a small sip of wine between his upturned lips.

“Did you convince Jihoon to play too? You guys seem close—ish,” Chan started, hesitating on the word ‘close.’ Because quite frankly, Chan wasn’t sure Jihoon was close with anyone.

“Not really, he did convince Jihoon not to quit though,” Seokmin said.

“Yeah, after we had that incident with the possum during the first week of practice, we thought he’d be gone for sure,” Mingyu added.

Chan stared at them in bewilderment. Wondering what in the world could have happened to be referred to as “the incident with the possum.”

“Okay, you have to at least tell him the story—look at his face,” Junhui said, pointing with his cup in hand at Chan, who was still awkwardly standing near the door frame.

“It’s not as wild as it seems. Well, the possum was wild for sure, but,” Mingyu began.

“Okay, let me tell it. It’s a short story. Like our second or third practice the first week, we were going back to the van—at the time we could still use the school vans. I don’t know if this revoked our use of them, or the flat tire thing, but anyways, when we got back to the van, there was a possum under it—you know, because it was, like, midnight or something and I guess that’s what possums do,” Wonwoo explained. “We didn’t know what to do, because we thought it would come out and kill us all if we got near the van. So we kinda just stood around and looked at it. Half hoping it would leave, and half hoping that if it left, it would not come near us and kill us all.”

“I remember it pretty well because I was a freshman at the time. I think it may have been my very first practice after Soonyoung told me about the team,” Seokmin added.

“We stood around for probably, like, 5 minutes, just staring at it, and it staring back at us, until Seungcheol said that we had to go home already because we didn’t have the van rented out forever,” Junhui continued.

“We were gonna dress Jihoon in all his gear and have him try to shoo it out with a stick. He seemed kind of into it but Seungcheol didn’t like the idea because Jihoon didn’t have a rabies shot or a neck guard. He thought it would spring out and bite Jihoon in the jugular or something horrifying,” Soonyoung said. “Then Mingyu mentioned that he had his rabies shot.”

“Yeah, I worked as a vet tech back home so they made me get one. Never thought it would come in handy,” Mingyu smiled.

“Not sure rabies shots ‘come in handy,’” Wonwoo remarked.

“It sure did this time!” Mingyu said, craning his head to turn to Wonwoo behind him.

“So what happened?” Chan asked.

“We made Mingyu try to go back the van up, without hitting the possum or anything, so we could get in without being near it,” Wonwoo said.

“But it ran away when he got near the driver side door,” Junhui added.

“Jihoon was annoyed. Probably because he wanted to fight the possum one-on-one like the original plan. But I convinced him there’d be more possums to fight in the future—so he should stick around,” Soonyoung said.

“It was more like Jihoon hated midnight practices and Soonyoung basically guilted him into staying because the team would collapse without a goalie,” Junhui corrected him.

“No, I think it was the possum thing,” Soonyoung said.

 

 

 

If it wasn’t obvious already, the hockey team had never been good at having their shit together. Both metaphorically, and in the way that the team was basically late to all their games (but once because of a flat tire—not their fault, they swear) and how Jihoon usually forgot to bring a mouth guard with him. Back to their first real game of the season—not a scrimmage, but one that actually mattered—Seungcheol waltzed into the locker room, clipboard in hand, eyes glued to it.

“Hey, I need to get your jersey numbers down for the roster. Can you tell me them?” Seungcheol asked, still not looking up from his notepad.

“You’ve been coaching us for two years. Why can’t you remember our numbers?” Wonwoo grumbled.

“Because they change every season,” Seungcheol defended himself.

“I’ve been number 4 for the past 4 years,” Jeonghan added.

“And Wonwoo’s had that horrendous jersey for as long as I’ve been here,” Seungkwan announced.

“There’s a lot going on in my life. I’m sorry I can’t remember these numbers that only matter, like, once a week for 3 months.”

“Why do you hate us?” Soonyoung asked sounding hurt.

“Just give me your fucking numbers,” Seungcheol sighed.

“Four,” Jeonghan announced.

“Seven,” Minghao added.

“Eighteen,” Vernon said.

Junhui announced, “Eleven.”

This continued until Jihoon was last, grumbling a “thirty.”

Well, Chan was last actually. He held Seungcheol’s jersey in his hands. Chan hoped that the number 21 on the back represented something more meaningful to Seungcheol than the legal drinking age. He’d been borrowing Seungcheol’s jersey for the scrimmages, until the team was able to order him his own. When Chan didn’t speak up, Seungcheol eyed him from behind his clipboard, containing either information about the team’s jersey numbers, or a tic-tac-toe game between him and Mingyu Chan saw them playing in the lobby earlier.

“I forgot you were still using my jersey. What number do you want for yours? I’ll order it after this game—I promise,” Seungcheol said.

Chan thought about the numbers that were taken already. He had a pretty big selection to choose from, and he had no interest in taking the number 69 from Wonwoo. Chan didn’t know how the league let him get away with that.

When Chan hesitated choosing a number, Soonyoung spoke up for him. “We don’t have a number 1, make Chan be 1.”

“Great, it’s decided,” Seungcheol said, flipping his notepad back to the first page.

Chan wondered why Seungcheol even bothered asking him for a preference.

“Okay, I’ll give the refs your jersey numbers, and when I get back we can start getting ready to go out,” Seungcheol announced, basically already out the door.

Conversations continued, some laughing, some hitting each other on the shoulder as punishment for a shitty joke. Chan eyed Jihoon, he was always pretty quiet in the locker room. With the possible conversation partners on their team, Chan didn’t blame him. Chan figured Jihoon preferred to listen to music rather than talking to the team as some kind of warm-up thing before games—getting focused or something. He wouldn’t mind talking to Jihoon though—only if he wanted to talk to Chan too.

Jisoo suddenly entered the locker room, making sure everyone had everything ready to play. Sticks taped, skates sharpened, mouth guards in—speaking of.

“Jihoon, did you remember to bring your mouth guard? This is a real game so the refs are going to be checking for it,” Jisoo asked.

“No,” Jihoon replied, slowly looking up at Jisoo and pulling his earbuds out.

“They sell them at the front desk. I’ll order some tea so we can boil it in the hot water,” Jisoo announced, turning his back to leave.

“No need. I’ll find one,” Jihoon replied, getting up off the bench.

“What do you mean _you’ll find one?_ ” Jisoo asked, but cut himself short with a horrified shriek as Jihoon started rummaging through the filthy locker room, trying to find a mouth guard left behind by a previous team.

“Got one,” Jihoon announced, holding up a mouth guard he found in the locker behind Mingyu.

“You can’t use—” Jisoo started before yelping as he watched Jihoon shove the mouth guard that had most-definitely been in someone else’s mouth into his own. Most of the team joined Jisoo in screeching out of horror watching Jihoon. Which is when Seungcheol entered the locker room again.

“Is everyone ready?” Seungcheol asked before noticing the team’s horrified expressions.

“All set,” Jihoon replied, slightly muffled by the mouth guard.

 

 

 

From his position in the net, Jihoon could see the whole ice. He never missed a thing. That’s probably why he didn’t go to Jeonghan’s the night before. He wasn’t going to play a game hungover, and he wasn’t going to be at Jeonghan’s apartment without getting properly wasted. Staying in Friday night meant he could keep his senses sharp. And he didn’t miss a kid checking Chan from behind when he didn’t even have the puck. Jihoon hated guys like that. Guys who thought that their size allowed them to be assholes.

The ref didn’t blow the whistle until the players stopped the game themselves to help Chan get back to his feet. He assured them that he was okay, just got the wind knocked out of him.

Jihoon left the net to skate to the nearest ref, trying to not let the anger get the best of him, but of course that’s what happened anyways. Pushing his helmet up off his face to the top of his head to he could face the ref better, he started, “Are you gonna throw that asshole out? He hit my teammate from behind! That’s an automatic DQ.” It was easier to argue with the refs when Jihoon didn’t have to worry about a mouth guard muffling his words.

“I didn’t see it,” the referee said calmly.

“Well, you’re the only one in this fucking ice rink who didn’t.”

“I can’t call what I don’t see. And you’re going to have to calm down before I throw you out.”

“So you’re gonna throw me out and not the shithead who hit my teammate from behind? What kind of fucking ref are you? You might as well go trade those stripes for your home jersey since you’re on their team anyways.”

“One more word out of you and you’re leaving the game.”

Seungcheol saw the Jihoon was making trouble but couldn’t stop him in time before he made it worse. As much as he appreciated Jihoon’s dedication to supporting his teammates, he went a little far sometimes.

“This is bullshit! And you know it! What would you have done if he would have gotten seriously hurt? Would you let it slide because ‘you didn’t see it?’ Do your fucking job and protect my guys from getting seriously injured from assholes like that. It’s obvious which team you’re rooting for with the amount of calls you’ve missed,” Jihoon ranted. “Are you just upset because you weren’t good enough to make the pros and now you’re ref-ing some bullshit college game—”

“That’s it. You’re done. Leave the ice.”

“This is fucking bullshit!”

Turning towards the bench, the ref shouted, “You better control your player before I disqualify your whole team.”

“Jihoon! Just leave the ice! It’s not worth it!” Seungcheol shouted.

“Fucking bullshit!” Jihoon shouted as he skated to the bench, throwing his helmet against the glass. “Someone’s gonna get hurt!” He shouted before leaving the bench for the locker room.

“Someone needs to serve his penalty,” the ref told Seungcheol, who was eyeing Seungkwan expectantly, already sitting on the bench.

“Everyone come here!” Seungcheol shouted. And the team formed a semicircle around him almost instantaneously. “Are you alright, Chan?”

“Yeah,” he breathed out. It was obvious he was a little nervous about Jihoon getting thrown out.

“Okay good. That’s the most important thing. The next most important thing: have you ever had experience playing goalie?”

“No not really. I tried it once in Mites, but I wasn’t any good,” Chan said.

“Good enough. Go to the locker room and put on Jihoon’s pads. We need you to stand in front of the goal for the rest of the game so this won’t end as badly as it could without someone in the net.”

Chan was pretty terrified of going anywhere near Jihoon after what he just witnessed. If that check from behind didn’t kill him, dealing with an angry Jihoon might.

“I’ll call a time out so you have 5 minutes. Hurry,” Seungcheol told him.

Chan hurried as quickly to the locker room as his nervous legs would allow him, but not before picking up Jihoon’s helmet off the ice. He peered his face through the crack of the door, trying to see if Jihoon had calmed down any. He was sitting on the bench, head down.

“H-hey, are you alright?” Chan asked.

Jihoon looked up, a little surprised, “I could ask you the same thing.”

“I’m okay—really, I am. But thanks for sticking up for me anyways,” Chan said, scooting further into the locker room.

“It’s nothing,” Jihoon said. “Maybe it was because I think we’re a lot alike.”

“Because we’re both short?”

“No, you fuck. Nevermind,” Jihoon grumbled.

“Well, sorry to ruin the moment we were having, but Seungcheol gave me 5 minutes to put on all your gear so I can play goalie for you.”

“You know how to play,” Jihoon asked in that way of him not actually asking things.

“No. I think he asked me to because we’re the same size.”

Jihoon let out a sigh, lips slightly curved upwards. “Okay, take off your gear and I’ll teach you how to put this shit on.”

And about 10 minutes later, with Jihoon trying to strap Chan into his leg pads and Seungcheol stalling asking the ref a bunch of bullshit, Chan re-entered the ice, covered in Jihoon’s pads. Now that he was faced with the terrifying position of having to stand in front of the net to block shots, Jihoon didn’t seem nearly as scary. Well, that, and remembering the photo of Jihoon wearing 9 coats made him seem less scary. The smile that Chan thought Jihoon let slip in the locker room made him seem less scary too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> based on a series of true, but unfortunate events


	10. "Can you make dinner for about 8 people on Friday?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When there's a tournament and nobody can make it.  
> Except for everyone who annoys Seungcheol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> today was literally my last day of classes and finals start soon so i wanted to post this now so i can die soon  
> sports happens  
> so does gays

“I don’t know why the league has a tournament every year during Thanksgiving break. Nobody can ever make the games,” Jeonghan mused.

“What do you mean? People just miss the games?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, they go home to spend time with their nice families or something,” Jeonghan replied. “It’s not like playing during the holidays is really worthwhile. Look at our team. We aren’t really hurting for Vernon and Seungkwan to show up.”

“But we’ll need Jun. Damn him and his nice family that spend holidays together,” Wonwoo complained.

“So, we aren’t gonna have a full team for these games?” Chan asked. It was hard enough playing with their small team as it was. He couldn’t imagine having even fewer players.

“We’ll all be there. I think Seokmin said he can make it to the first one, but has to go home before the next two. So Friday, we’ll at least have one sub,” Soonyoung explained, sticking a fry in his mouth.

“ _One_ sub?” Chan asked, a little horrified.

“Yeah, haven’t you ever played an entire game before? It’s not that bad,” Jeonghan said.

“Can Jihoon come?” Chan asked.

“Of course he’ll be there. What else does he have to do? And it’d be an automatic forfeit without him. He’s nice enough to show so that won’t happen,” Jeonghan said.

“Who else can come?”

“I think Minghao is staying. I guess his parents will be busy through the holiday weekend so it doesn’t matter if he goes home or not.”

“So, it’s gonna be me, Jeonghan, Soonyoung, Minghao, Jihoon, and you. And Seokmin for Friday,” Wonwoo said. “That’s pretty good.”

“And we have to play the whole tournament like that?”

“We won’t play—we’ll _survive_ the tournament like that,” Jeonghan said, pointing his fork at Chan.

Chan knit his eyebrows together and stared at the plate in front of him. This weekend was going to be horrible.

“Hey, you better start loading up on carbs now—you’re gonna need them,” Jeonghan smiled, twirling a leaf of spinach on his fork.

“What about you? Why are you wasting your free meal swipe from Chan on a salad?” Wonwoo asked, a little accusatory.

“I have to eat healthy.”

“To cancel out the binge drinking?” Soonyoung asked.

“To cancel out the binge drinking,” Jeonghan confirmed.

“You could always not binge drink,” Chan said quietly.

Jeonghan eyed him from across the table. “And what fucking fun is that?”

Chan returned to his grilled cheese, eyeing it instead of Jeonghan’s glare.

“Did you want to go buy a new stick today?” Soonyoung asked him, turning the focus away from Jeonghan. “I know you said you wanted to buy one before the tournament and I’m free to drive you today if you feel like it,” Soonyoung said, smiling that characteristic smile of his.

Chan was a little surprised Soonyoung remembered. “Yeah, that’d be great.”

“We can go after we’re finished eating, if you’re okay with that.”

“Yeah,” Chan smiled.

 

It was a little weird for Soonyoung to be driving Chan without the sophomores. Soonyoung really tried being friends with Chan, pretty much from the start. And he never gave up. Which was obvious now as he was driving Chan to the used sporting goods store so Chan could buy a new stick. It was a nearly impossible walk, and the buses didn’t come out this way. It was only right that Soonyoung offer to drive him.

Chan was poking around Soonyoung’s car, not ever having been in the front seat before. Minghao or Seungkwan usually got it (Seungkwan only because he whined a lot and nobody liked hearing him cry about how cramped the backseat was).

“Can you look to see if Wonwoo’s lighter is in here? He’s claiming he left it after we hotboxed in here last Tuesday,” Soonyoung asked, something to break the silence between them.

Chan was going to ask what hotboxing was, and why there were doing it on a Tuesday night, but he nodded instead, beginning to look for said lighter.

After checking the glove compartment, under his seat, and in the door, Chan opened the inner console and was surprised to find it filled with water. Well, nothing about Soonyoung really surprised Chan anymore.

“Uh, can I ask why this is filled with water?”

“What?” Soonyoung asked, looking at Chan for only a moment to see what he was talking about. “Oh, that. A couple of us were coming back from a late night breakfast adventure, the night it snowed, and I told Jihoon to throw snowballs at Wonwoo’s car. Long story short, a squirrel ran in front of my car, I braked really hard, and all the snow on the roof of my car came in through the sunroof.”

Chan had a lot of questions. This was not a Soonyoung story that he wanted the short version of. He decided to go with, “How was Jihoon getting snow to throw at Wonwoo?”

“From all the snow built up on my roof, duh,” Soonyoung replied. “Well, before it all came into my car. He ended up covered in it, after he basically flew into the windshield—he wasn’t hurt though. God was watching out for us that night.”

Chan wouldn’t say the same.

“You didn’t ask why the seats were covered in towels?”

“That didn’t strike me as weird coming from you,” Chan said. Soonyoung laughed at that.

While Chan was looking at new sticks, trying to find one with the right kind of flex, the kind of curve on the blade he liked, Soonyoung was convincing a store employee he played roller hockey and was looking for new skates, and needed to try them on in the store. This ended with Soonyoung crashing into the mouth guard display and getting kicked out of the store. He waited in the car while Chan finished with his selection and while Chan waited for the employee who wasn’t cleaning up the mouth guards to trim the size down for him.

  
  


The night before Vernon was going to leave for break, they were seated on the floor of Minghao’s dorm, playing one of Vernon’s horrible sport video games on Minghao’s PS2 that neither of them could figure out.

“Why do you even have this game?” Minghao laughed, failing to hit a pitch for the twelfth or so time in a row.

“I don’t remember. I think it was a gift. Didn’t you play baseball? Why can’t you figure it out?” Vernon replied, laughing as Minghao struck out again.

“Baseball is much easier when it’s not on the PS2…. Why didn’t you play baseball instead of hockey? You’re good at standing around doing nothing—you could have been a good outfielder,” Minghao joked.

“Because then I wouldn’t have gotten to meet you,” Vernon said, looking down at the controller in his hand instead of the boy next to him out of his own embarrassment at his comment.

Minghao turned to him, smiling. “What? You like me kicking your ass all practice long?” Minghao asked.

“Yeah,” Vernon said shyly. “You could kick my ass all day long,” he laughed.

After a short moment of neither of them focusing on the game, Vernon added, “I’m gonna miss you.”

“You’ll only be gone for five days,” Minghao responded.

“But that’s five days we can’t hang out,” Vernon said shyly, eyes remained downturned to the controller in his hands, not realizing it was his turn to bat in the game.

Minghao thought about his words, and placed his hand on Vernon’s, still on his controller. When Vernon looked up at him, Minghao brought their faces together, noses brushing against each other before Minghao could bring a free hand to Vernon’s jaw to steady him while he brought their lips together. The kiss lasted long enough for Minghao to take Vernon’s top lip between his own, hand sliding to the back of Vernon’s neck.

Breaking their kiss, Minghao smiled and said, “I’m gonna miss you too.”

 

 

7:14 am on Friday morning, Soonyoung, Chan, and Minghao were waiting outside of Jihoon’s apartment building. He was supposed to be in the car at 7 am.

“He’s still not picking up,” Soonyoung sighed into his cellphone.

“What are we gonna do?” Chan asked.

“I’m going in,” Soonyoung said, shoving his phone back in his pocket and pulling his keys out of the ignition.

“How are you going to get in?” Chan asked.

“I have a key,” Soonyoung replied, digging out his wallet to pull a key out of one of the compartments. Of course Soonyoung had a key to Jihoon’s place. They were friends after all. But Chan wondered what kind of friends give each other keys to their apartments. Good friends, Chan figured.

“Does Jun know Jihoon still has the spare for your apartment?” Minghao asked, looking up from his phone.

“Jun doesn’t even know we have a spare,” Soonyoung replied, opening the driver side door. “Stay here kids.”

And about 7 minutes later (Chan had been counting, as the silence between him and Minghao was uncomfortable. But he also didn’t know how to talk to Minghao. He was out of his friend-league for sure. And Minghao was occupied with his phone anyways.) Soonyoung re-emerged, dragging a sleepy Jihoon behind him.

Soonyoung opened the back door, tossed Jihoon in a seat, threw a blanket over him, and headed back into the apartment (to grab Jihoon’s stuff, Chan presumed).

“…so,” Chan started. He couldn’t stand the silence anymore, especially now that Jihoon had entered the equation.

“He’ll sleep the whole ride, don’t worry,” Minghao said, setting down his phone to turn to Chan from the front seat.

“You’ve done road trips with him before?” Chan said quietly, worried he’d wake up.

“Yeah, he sleeps pretty much the entire time, even when we leave in the afternoon. Nobody dares to wake him because he gets really hangry.”

“ _Hangry?_ ’

“You know, hungry and angry? If you wake him up, you’ll see,” Minghao said, turning back to his phone.

Enter Soonyoung throwing Jihoon’s gear in his tiny trunk, only to end up tossing Jihoon’s stick and pads on Chan. “Hold that for me, will you? I can’t fit them in the trunk.”

“Sure,” Chan groaned, already fated to be stuck with the gear.

Chan had never seen Jihoon not angry, so he decided to take his chances by speaking up after awhile of driving to the tune of Soonyoung’s eclectic music library.

“So do we have hotel rooms again for this trip?” Chan asked.

“No, we’re gonna stay with Jisoo’s parents. His house is like a 45-minute drive from the rink. It worked out really well for us that he joined the team,” Soonyoung said.

“I wonder what his parents are like,” Chan mused.

“Probably nice Christians just like their son,” Soonyoung replied. “Jisoo said his mom was looking forward to cooking for us. How mom-ly is that? I’m excited to eat something that’s not Easy Mac for the first time in a month.”

“It’s also better than the roach motel we stayed at last year,” Minghao added, barely interested in the conversation.

“Roach motel?” Chan asked.

“You know? A cheap motel covered in roaches?” Soonyoung tried to confirm with him.

 

 

“Okay I got this great deal on a hotel for us. I got 2 big suites for all of us to share,” Seungcheol announced to the team when he reached the table they all congregated at. “I got them for a steal--Twenty-five bucks a night!”

“Are they cardboard boxes? What kind of place rents out rooms for 25 a night?” Jeonghan asked.

“They said they passed all the health inspections. I assume it’s a solid structure.”

“How many beds?” Seungkwan asked.

“Six; enough for all of us,” Seungcheol replied. “We can go there now that you’ve finished playing.”

And the hotel (read motel) definitely didn’t have a 5-star review from Expedia. It was a grungy looking set of buildings, the kind that made you fear for your life.

“Twenty-five dollars a night,” Jeonghan repeated when they pulled up to the place.

“I bet it’s nicer on the inside,” Seungcheol defended himself.

And it sort of was. The place had definitely had not been renovated since the late 70’s but the rooms appeared clean and neat.

“How are we splitting up?” Seokmin asked.

“We’ll do it by age, me, the seniors and juniors will take the bigger room. You sophomores and freshmen can take the smaller one,” Seungcheol said, handing Seokmin the keys to their suite.

That left Mingyu, Seokmin, Jihoon, and freshmen Minghao, Seungkwan and Vernon together. In what would later come to known as the hell motel. Mingyu with Jihoon, Seokmin with Seungkwan, and Minghao with Vernon. In the hell motel (mot- _hell_ ).

“It doesn’t seem that bad,” Seokmin said, examining the rooms; there were two bedrooms, a living room, a kitchenette, and full bathroom. This really was a steal. There must be something wrong with it.

The next morning would prove just what that something was. Minghao was one of the first ones awake, leaving the bed he shared with Vernon to begin his morning. While brushing his teeth, a cockroach crawled out of the drain of the bathroom sink. His eyes widened but didn’t make any noise--afraid to wake the others. So he moved to the bathtub quickly to spit out the toothpaste leftover in between his teeth, but that too, had roaches crawling in it.

Minghao then quickly moved to the kitchen sink, only to find roaches all across the counter tops. His last resort was spitting in the toilet, which was cockroach-free.

He then moved back to the room he shared with Vernon, Seungkwan, and Seokmin and shook Vernon awake. “Dude, get up. There’s roaches everywhere.”

“Five more minutes,” Vernon groaned and turned back over on his side.

“C’mon man, it’s so gross in here,” Minghao said, shaking Vernon awake. “There’s roaches on every inch of this place.”

“Papa Roach doesn’t make any good music,” Vernon said in his sleep.

Minghao didn’t know what else to do except to start tickling Vernon, trying to feign the feeling of cockroaches climbing on Vernon’s body. Which caused Vernon to wake with a scream--putting the pieces together finally. Which then woke everyone else.

“What the fuck,” Seungkwan groaned, sitting up in his bed next to theirs.

“There’s roaches all over this place,” Minghao informed him.

“Oh god,” Seungkwan said to himself.

Seokmin struggled to wake up shortly after. “What are we talking about?”

Mingyu walked into their room, eyelids heavy with sleep, “What’s going on in here?”

“There’s roaches everywhere,” Minghao said.

“Really? I haven’t seen any,” Mingyu responded, voice raspy.

“Look around; they’re everywhere!” Minghao shouted. And as he said so, a roach appeared on the wall behind him.

“Oh hey, you’re right. There’s a roach behind you,” Mingyu said.

Seungkwan screamed. And Vernon was finally conscious enough to realize the situation and screamed as well.

“Pack you shit! We are leaving!” Seungkwan exclaimed.

The five of them gathered their stuff and went to the others’ room to explain the problem, which by now, they too were fully aware of.

Seungcheol answered the door, body still riddled with sleep. Behind him, hair in disarray, voice tired, Jeonghan groaned, “Twenty-five dollars a night.”

 

 

“I shared a bed with Wonwoo and he refused to get under the covers. I don’t know what kind of diseases we caught there, but we survived,” Soonyoung continued.

“What about Jihoon?” Chan asked in a whisper.

“He didn’t mind the roaches. He was like their leader or something; none of them bothered him,” Soonyoung said.

Chan scooted a little further away from Jihoon’s sleeping body.

 

When they arrived at the rink, Seungcheol was scribbling something on his notepad, Wonwoo appeared asleep with this face resting on his crossed arms at their table, Seokmin was eating rink French fries, and Jeonghan was stealing bites. Jisoo was nowhere to be found.

“Took you long enough,” Jeonghan said.

Soonyoung didn’t answer, but rather just pointed to Jihoon who was still wrapped in a blanket, eyes closed.

“Fair,” Jeonghan added.

“What’s the game plan, coach?” Soonyoung asked, turning to Seungcheol.

Seungcheol held up an intricate drawing of a landscape scene, complete with a sun wearing sunglasses in the corner of the picture. “There is no game plan.” He eyed Jihoon. “When are you gonna wake him up?”

“When you have a plan to feed him.”

“I’ve got a raspberry poptart and red Gatorade.”

“Great, his favorites.”

“Is that really game-day food?” Chan interrupted.

“No, but this isn’t a game-day; this is war,” Seungcheol said dramatically.

“Shut up,” Jeonghan groaned.

“Where’s Jisoo?” Chan asked.

“I think he’s nervous puking in the bathroom. He’s afraid this won’t go well,” Seokmin stated.

“Okay, so everything’s going great so far,” Soonyoung said.

“Yeah, and you have,” Seungcheol looked down at his watch, "37 minutes until puck drop. Better get going.”

Chan was worried. Why were they always late to everything? Then he looked at Soonyoung trying to shake Jihoon awake ( _C’mon I got your favorite food! Wake up! It’s game time. At least put your pads on and sleep in front of the net so we have a c--)_ and answered his own question.

 

 

On the bench, Seungcheol gave his last pump-up speech before they had to play. “Okay, we’re gonna keep all the water bottles on the back of Jihoon’s net so you can get a drink,” Seungcheol announced.

“Because we can’t go back to the bench?” Soonyoung asked.

“Because you can’t go back to the bench,” Seungcheol agreed, sighing.

“Let’s just play our game, okay? We’re used to being down some players. Just support your teammates. If you see Jeonghan’s going for a break out, bust your ass to go with him. Don’t waste your energy in the corners. Make good passes. Let the other team do all the work,” Seungcheol explained.

“Okay D, you guys aren’t gonna have any shifts. Conserve your energy. Just support Jihoon,” Jisoo explained to Wonwoo and Jeonghan.

“Are you guys ready?” Seungcheol asked.

“We don’t have a choice, the ref just blew the whistle,” Wonwoo deadpanned.

“You’re so fucking lucky I can’t bench you,” Seungcheol said, teeth clenched.

Wonwoo blew him a kiss and the team gathered to do their little pathetic seven-person cheer. The only people who were going to change the whole game were the forwards, Seokmin was the only one left on the bench and he would replace anyone who got too tired. Jeonghan and Wonwoo were preparing to play a whole game, 60 minutes of ice time, no problem.

Jihoon had it easy though; he usually played 60 minutes. Nothing new for him.

Their team looked pretty pathetic in comparison to their opponents. Seven people compared 18. And it was eventually their downfall.

 

During the first half of the third period, when Jihoon stopped a shot, catching it easily in his glove, the whole team collapsed. They’d already played 47 minutes and 31 seconds. They were dead tired.

Jeonghan had taken a knee to Jihoon’s left, which caused Wonwoo to sit on the ice to Jihoon’s right, Soonyoung sprawled out on the ice, breathing heavy, Minghao was leaning against the goal post, and Chan was left standing in between it all, chest rising and falling dramatically.

“What are they doing??” Seungcheol asked.

“I think they’re taking a break,” Seokmin said, matter-of-factly.

“Fuck,” Seungcheol sighed.

The other team had lined up, ready for the puck drop, and Seungcheol’s team was on the ice, heaving.

“Ref! I’m calling a time out.”

The referee nodded in response, delivering the news to the opposing team who were still mystified as to why the other team was all laid out on the ice.

They ended up losing; 2-4, which wasn’t bad. Jihoon played a good game. And Jeonghan and Wonwoo got pelted with shots from the points in order to save Jihoon some trouble. Minghao and Jeonghan had the two goals; Minghao’s was shorthanded after Wonwoo got a penalty for tripping which even he wouldn’t contest. With all the shots Jihoon saw, he still maintained above a .90 save record. A lot of teams wondered how their team could have one of the best goalies in the league and still lose as much as they did.

 

After everyone showered and ate Jisoo’s mom’s vegan lasagna for dinner, they split off in different rooms in the house to finally get some rest. 

Wonwoo, Soonyoung, Minghao, and Chan all got the living room. 

“Hey Minghao, who’re texting? Your _boyfriend?”_ Wonwoo smirked.

“Oh, it’s just Vernon. He said they got stuck in traffic and now he’s with Seungkwan at some sketch restaurant in the middle of nowhere. And Seungkwan is sulking over his shitty diner food,” Minghao replied nonchalantly; he got one of the couches in a game of rock-paper-scissor

“So your boyfriend?”

“What?” Minghao replied.

“Leave him alone; he played a long game today,” Soonyoung said from his spot on the second-fluffiest couch in the living room.

“I’m just interested,” Wonwoo replied, from the floor because he lost rock-paper-scissors. “Don’t you think it’s unfair that we all got stuck in the living room, when those four gays got beds.”

“They got beds because they’re gay. It’s a privilege to be an item, or at least look like one.”

“Jihoon will only admit to being with Seungcheol when there’s a place to sleep involved.”

Wonwoo eyed Minghao again, crafting something.

“At least we didn’t have to deal with Vernon and Seungkwan going offsides like 30 times today,” Wonwoo said.

“Leave him alone, he’s still getting the hang of it,” Minghao said, looking up from his phone.

“ _Him?_ You’re not gonna stand up for both of them?” Wonwoo asked.

“Seungkwan’s a brat,” Minghao replied.

“Fair,” Wonwoo shrugged before turning over, taking the blanket with him to cover himself atop the plush carpet of Jisoo’s living room.

 

Of course Jeonghan and Jisoo got his room for the bedding arrangements. And of course they decided to fuck around in it.

“Have you ever wanted to do it in your childhood bed?” Jeonghan smirked against Jisoo’s neck.

“Yeah,” he breathed out with a smile.

“What’s it feel like? Fulfilling your dream?” Jeonghan joked between nipping at Jisoo’s skin.

“It feels a lot like the times I did it in high school.”

Jeonghan pulled away from where he was straddling Jisoo’s hips, who was smirking back at him. “Why do you ruin everything for me?”

“Because you’re cute when you’re all confused. Your eyebrows do this cute thing, like they are right now,” Jisoo smiled, putting his index finger in the crease between Jeonghan’s brows. “Did you really think you were the first one to think of this idea?”

“You could at least let me pretend,” Jeonghan huffed.

“Okay, sorry, you’re the first one I’ve ever fooled around with in my childhood bed,” Jisoo said, patting Jeonghan’s cheek, then dragging him back down by the shirt collar to connect their lips.

 

“Are you thinking about the game? You know that stuff doesn’t matter,” Seungcheol said, turning over on his side to face Jihoon. In the large guest bed, they could both lay comfortably next to each other, not cramped like Jihoon’s twin mattress.

“It just feels like, it’s my fault. We lose because I can’t block enough shots,” Jihoon said, eyes focused on the ceiling.

“You know that’s not how it is. A team isn’t just their goalie. Everyone contributes to the losses, and the wins,” Seungcheol said.

“A team relies on their goalie to block shots. I’m letting them down,” Jihoon said releasing a sigh, eyes falling shut.

“And how is that team supposed to win when there’s six of them and they don’t score any goals?” Seungcheol asked, knowing the answer. “Listen,” Seungcheol started, supporting himself on an elbow, “You're our best player, and we are so lucky to have you as our goalie. You can’t let the scores affect you. It’s not your fault that we don’t win. It’ll never be. Unless you leave the net open mid-game to smoke a bowl—then we might blame you for a loss,” Seungcheol chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

Jihoon’s lips curved upwards just slightly, just to humor Seungcheol. His mind was still racing with thoughts about his worth to the team—the team he didn’t even care about supposedly. Everything felt like his fault.

He felt like Seungcheol’s feelings were his fault. He knew Seungcheol worried about him. Maybe Seungcheol felt like Jihoon wasn’t trying in whatever they would call this relationship they had. Jihoon wished he could tell Seungcheol that he cherished him. Jihoon cherished the person who continued to give him attention when he could never give it back. The person who wasted his time trying to help Jihoon.

Everything was Jihoon’s fault.

And he couldn’t even tell anyone how he felt.

Seungcheol remained quiet after that. Thinking about Jihoon’s words. Breaking their silence only to ask: “Do you wanna mess around?” with a smirk.

 

“What are you doing out here?” Wonwoo asked from his spot on the floor.

“I got kicked out,” Seungcheol sighed, holding a pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not that happy with this chapter but it needed an update so here u go


	11. "Yes, I'm staying safe."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang fucks around at a frat party.  
> Well, most of the gang.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont know what im doing anymore  
> sorry hannah this reads like mall au i just dont know how to write a linear fic with a plot  
> so this is like flashback and time skip central
> 
> i might come back and edit this later

“Hey Mingyu,” Jeonghan began, a little out of breath, “When is your frat gonna have another party?”

“I didn’t know they were letting you back into those,” Seokmin added, grabbing a water bottle.

“They’re not, but I miss the free alcohol,” Jeonghan said wistfully, leaning against the boards.

“Do grad students usually still go to frats?” Jisoo asked, standing by Jeonghan’s limp body. Those two were always together these days.

“Again, no. Why can’t you guys just let me have a good time?” Jeonghan huffed. “C’mon Mingyu, what’s the news?”

“I think we’re having something this weekend. Friday night,” Mingyu said, adjusting the straps on his elbow pads. They didn’t even really cover his arms; he was too lanky.

“Perfect. Our game isn’t until Sunday so I’ll have time to recover,” Jeonghan smiled.

“You’re really going to go?” Jisoo asked, actually surprised. “When you could legally go to a real bar?”

“Of course, it’s free alcohol. Why would I waste _my_ money to get fucked up when I could do it for free?” Jeonghan replied, turning towards Jisoo. “I think they forgot about last time anyways. Mingyu’s frats are always the best. It’s full of rich kids who use their daddies’ credit cards to buy good booze.”

“It’s pretty cool that you’re in a frat,” Chan, who had been trying to get some water that was being blocked by the kids not drinking any, said to Mingyu.

“It’s not as cool as you think. I’m pretty sure they just use him for chick bait for parties,” Wonwoo added.

“I don’t think that’s it,” Mingyu replied with a whine in his tone.

“Tell them how they recruited you,” Wonwoo demanded.

“Some guys walked up to me on the quad and asked me if I wanted to join. It was like 8am and I said yes because I wasn’t awake yet. I didn’t have to rush or anything.” Mingyu explained.

“He doesn’t even go to chapter because of hockey. All he does is go to their parties and look pretty like he usually does,” Jun said, pinching Mingyu’s cheek between his forefinger and thumb on his free hand. When did Jun even get there? And how did he manage to get hold of a water bottle before Chan?

“Well, that seems, fun,” Chan said.

“It is,” Jeonghan said. Turning to Jisoo, he asked, “So, are you gonna go with me?” He smiled that smile that meant he was planning something dubious, but Jisoo always fell for it anyways.

“Aren’t we too old for that kind of thing?” Jisoo said, forcing a laugh that Jeonghan wasn’t joining in on.

“It’s free booze and drugs, who would pass that up? I didn’t get my bachelor’s degree just to miss out on frats,” Jeonghan explained. “Didn’t you go to frats in undergrad?”

“Of course, back in, like, freshman year,” Jisoo said.

“Come on, it will be fun,” Jeonghan smiled.

“Seokmin aren’t you upset you joined an academic frat instead of a social one?” Jun asked.

“Not really, we do a lot of charity work and fundraising.”

“When do you guys party though?”

“When we go to Mingyu’s frat.”

“C’mon, let’s go get fucked up and make-out with strangers,” Jeonghan offered.

“I’m always up for that,” Jun smiled.

“I think I’m gonna assemble the justice league of drinking,” Jeonghan announced.

“Oh god,” Wonwoo said. “Are Minghao and Jihoon up to this?”

“It’s alcohol, so you know at least Jihoon will wanna go. I’ll have to convince Minghao,” Jeonghan said, looking over to where Seungkwan and Vernon as they were trying to see who could do the most spins before falling over; Minghao was keeping count. (Minghao was actually thinking about his bio test that was tomorrow morning. All he could remember was that the mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell. His test was on dominant hereditary traits in different types of pea plants.)

(Vernon fell first.)

“Why is Minghao a member if he doesn’t even like going out with you guys?” Wonwoo asked.

“I need to assemble everyone on campus who’re good at drinking. It’s like my life’s mission to create a super-team of alcoholics. God put me on this earth to do this. And anyone who doesn’t get hangovers is immediately initiated into the drinking alliance. That’s a special skill and I need him on my team.”

“Just because he’s good at drinking doesn’t mean he’ll want to be in your weird AA club.”

“It has its own perks. Like getting into exclusive frat parties,” Jeonghan explained.

“Are you going to go?” Jun asked Chan, who was lost in his own thoughts at this point.

“Huh? Me?” Chan asked.

“Yeah,” Jun chucked. “Jeonghan usually always makes a scene at these things so it’s pretty fun just to watch for that. If the whole team goes, it’s bound to be good.”

Chan wondered if the sophomores would be going. Jeonghan was hoping Minghao would at least go. For his drinking team, at least.

He only needed to convince Jihoon to go, who was currently talking to the coach, Seungcheol.

“Are you free tonight?” Seungcheol asked.

“I don’t know. Free for what,” Jihoon stated.

“I don’t know. Hanging out?”

“I heard Mingyu’s having a party. I might go to that.”

“Hey,” Seungcheol started in a serious tone. “How are you feeling? You’re going down a little slow on your right side.”

“I’m fine.”

“Really? You don’t have to keep working—”

“I’m fine,” Jihoon stated curtly before skating away, which caused Seungcheol to resume practice.

 

-

 

Jeonghan thought his bedroom was big, but Friday night, filled with 5 people, it seemed terribly cramped. It was about half an hour before they decided to head out to Mingyu’s frat and Wonwoo decided that was the perfect time to teach Jisoo how to smoke weed (so he’d enjoy the party more or whatever).

And this wasn’t the first time Jisoo had been to Jeonghan’s apartment.

 

Jeonghan had invited Jisoo over when Wonwoo was at work on a Saturday morning. “Wow, your place is pretty big,” Jisoo said with wide eyes, looking over the apartment. He’d never seen anything past the living room and kitchen last time he visited (a dreadful day for Jeonghan).

“Yeah, because it’s pretty far from campus we got a pretty good deal on it,” Jeonghan said, watching Jisoo look over their apartment.

“You have your own rooms?” Jisoo asked, peering into the hallway.

“Yeah. I got the bigger one. I had to beat Wonwoo in Mario Kart in order to get it. He didn’t know how good I was at virtual driving, but having the smaller room reminds him.”

 

The large room for winners was now occupied by a bunch of people—most of them losers.

“Okay, Jisoo, you put your mouth on the top part—not around the lip—and you light this part. Then when it fills up with smoke, you breathe in. Don’t just hold the smoke in your mouth—you have to let it fill your lungs up and shit,” Wonwoo carefully explained to Jisoo, moving his hands to the right positions with his own.

Wonwoo wasn’t too keen on Jisoo, mostly because he didn’t want to be. He was pretty critical of the nerd Jeonghan was currently interested in. But he was up for teaching the kid how to smoke weed, and subsequently was up for watching the nerd get high.

“Are you gonna let him take the first hit? I thought we were all gonna get crossfaded,” Soonyoung whined.

“It’s, like, sacramental. He has to take the first hit because it’s _his_ first hit. Get it?” Wonwoo said.

“Holy shit, that’s so deep,” Soonyoung said.

“I’m not telling you not to—believe me, I don’t tell anyone not to get fucked up—but are you sure you wanna smoke with these fucks?” Jeonghan asked.

“Yeah, I trust you guys,” Jisoo smiled, turning his attention from Wonwoo’s hands to Jeonghan.

“I’ve never heard someone say that to me before,” Jun stated, taking a swig straight from a bottle of coconut rum.

Jeonghan looked at Jisoo’s hands holding the glass bong, obviously unsure of what he was doing. “Why are you making him use the bong? You should have just rolled a blunt or something—I know you have papers,” Jeonghan complained.

“We never get to break out the bong,” Wonwoo said, turning excitedly towards Jeonghan’s glare.

“We used it Wednesday,” Soonyoung countered.

“I mean _we_ as the _Jisoo’s here and let’s get him fucked up as hell we,_ ” Wonwoo corrected himself. “C’mon, it’ll be worth it.”

“Okay _fiiiiine,_ fuck up Jisoo,” Jeonghan sighed.

Jisoo was fumbling with the glass, obviously unaware of how to use it even after Wonwoo’s detailed description. Jeonghan was tired of watching Jisoo struggle and decided if they were gonna go to Mingyu’s frat this century Jisoo had to have one successful hit. So Jeonghan took the bong into his own hands, positioning it so Jisoo didn’t have to struggle with holding it. “I’m gonna light it for you, so just breathe in when I tell you,” Jeonghan told him, holding eye contact.

Jisoo nodded in response.

Jeonghan lit the bowl, allowing smoke to fill the neck of the glass. When there was a sufficient amount of smoke to Jeonghan’s liking, he told Jisoo, “Now breathe in.”

And Jisoo did as instructed.

“That was a big hit, don’t you think?” Soonyoung said from his position in Wonwoo’s lap.

“He should be okay, right Jisoo?” Jeonghan asked.

Jisoo was frozen.

“You okay?” Jeonghan repeated.

Staring into nothingness, Jisoo whispered in a small voice, “ _No.”_

“This is gonna be so fun,” Jun laughed.

 

 

Seungkwan told the three when they were approaching the door, “Let me do the talking.”

“There’s no way we’ll get in if you’re the one doing the talking,” Vernon replied.

“Shut _up,_ ” Seungkwan replied.

“Is there a problem with us coming to this?” Chan asked Minghao.

“No, not if we know somebody. Frats like this like to act exclusive to make their parties look more desirable or something,” he replied.

They approached the door, and Seungkwan reached for the doorbell.

“What are you doing—you don’t ring the doorbell!” Vernon exclaimed.

“How else will they let us in?” he asked in reply with a small huff of annoyance.

Between their bickering someone opened the door. “What can I do for you?” they asked.

“Yes, we—” Seungkwan started.

“We know Mingyu,” Minghao said flatly.

“Okay, come in,” they replied.

Chan thought Minghao was literally the coolest guy on earth. He navigated the house easily, finding drinks for himself, Vernon, and Seungkwan, and didn’t make a big deal out of Chan declining a drink. Chan couldn’t stop looking at him with admiring eyes. Somewhere, Soonyoung’s heart was breaking as Chan’s faux big brother.

And that somewhere was on a dirty couch with Wonwoo, watching Jun and Jeonghan dance and keeping an eye on Jisoo, who was fascinated by the strobe lights reflecting on the ceiling.

“Do you think he’s okay?” Soonyoung asked against the shell of Wonwoo’s ear.

“I think he’s more than okay,” Wonwoo laughed against his.

Mingyu waltzed in, all lanky-legged and model-faced glory; Jeonghan spotted him.

“ _Heeeeeeeeeeeey,”_ he slurred, “Come dance with us.”

“Hey Jeonghan,” Mingyu replied. “I’m glad you’re having fun.”

“Is Jihoon here? I need him for my drinking club?” Jeonghan asked.

“I haven’t seen him,” Mingyu replied. Jeonghan wrapped his arms around Mingyu; Jun was playing with Mingyu’s sides from behind.

“I brought my sharpie to keep his shot tally and everything!” Jeonhan whined.

Jun looked away from where he was playing with Jeonghan’s fingers behind Mingyu’s back at just the right moment to see Chan following Minghao around like a baby duck.

Jun took one of Jeonghan’s hands from Mingyu’s waist and used it to point at Chan across the house. “Look! It’s our baby!”

“Mingyu, go get him for us,” Jeonghan slurred.

Mingyu followed Jeonghan’s hand where Jun was using it to point out Chan’s location.

“Hey guys, you decided to come,” Mingyu said to Minghao who, despite Chan being the only sober one, was still the most coherent and normal of the four.

“Are all your parties this crowded?” Chan asked, and basically had to shout, “And this loud?”

“Is this your first frat party?” Mingyu shouted back with a grin.

Chan nodded.

Mingyu ruffled his hair. “You’ll get used to it,” he smiled.

Surprisingly, the gesture did ease Chan’s worry.

“ _Heeeey,_ losers _,”_ Jun said, appearing behind Mingyu with a stumble.

“Hey Jun,” Minghao said.

“Am I really a loser?” Seungkwan asked, looking like he was going to cry. He was a sad-drunk—one of the worst kinds of drunks, Vernon always told him.

“You especially,” Jun answered. With his arms straddling Mingyu, he asked, “So how are you liking your first frat, Chan?”

“It’s dirty and someone spilled a drink on me,” Chan answered.

“Great.”

“How are you?”

“Wasted. But you should see Jisoo—he’s flipping the fuck out from one bong rip.”

“Where is he?”

“Right over there with Soonyoung and Wonwoo,” Jun answered, turning to see Soonyoung and Wonwoo, but no Jisoo. “Oh fuck, we lost him.”

“You _lost_ him?”

“Ehhh, he’ll be okay.”

“Where’s Jeonghan?” Minghao finally butted in. “Did he already get kicked out? That beats last year’s record.”

“No, he’s over there—oh wait—no, I lost him too. Maybe he’s in the bathroom or something. Anyways, Mingyu’s here now, so I vote we do body shots off him.”

“Aren’t you worried about Jeonghan and Jisoo? It’s really crowded in here,” Chan asked.

“It’s not my fault if they miss the body shots—I’ll go grab Soonyoung and Wonwoo.”

 

Jeonghan didn’t fulfill his plans. Well, he did part way. He sure got fucked up, as one does at frats. But the kid he was making out with in a dirty bathroom was definitely not a stranger.

Of course it was Jisoo, who he forced to tag along to the party that 1. _was_ too young for them, and 2. Jeonghan was supposedly banned from going to.

It started with Jeonghan slurring: “How’re you doing?” missing Jisoo’s ear and basically saying it against his cheek as he climbed into Jisoo’s lap on the couch.

“I’m scared,” Jisoo replied.

“Why?”

“Because I’m not sure where my hands are.”

“Want me to find them for you?” Jeonghan grinned.

“This isn’t as sexy as you think it is.”

 

Jeonghan and Jisoo’s relationship wasn’t typical; it never seemed to go smoothly, like a healthy relationship should—Jeonghan should have realized that. Or maybe he did, and just didn’t care. A few weeks ago was a good example, when they were just starting to get together.

“Who are you texting?” Wonwoo asked Jeonghan, who was sitting on their ugly couch, staring at his phone.

“Jisoo,” Jeonghan replied, without looking up.

“Are you catching feelings for this guy? I thought you said you were just fucking around,” Wonwoo said smugly. (When didn’t he sound smug?)

“I’m not. I just think I should probably talk to the guy,” Jeonghan said.

“Okay, but you’re always talking to the guy. You sure you’re not in love with him or something?” Wonwoo asked.

“I’m not. Don’t you have to go jerk off to some boy you’ll never get or something?” Jeonghan said, finally looking up at Wonwoo.

“Yeah I do, thanks for reminding me,” Wonwoo replied, before walking back to his bedroom.

“ _hey do u wanna go to the park by the school”_

⊲Jeonghan

“ _Now? It’s midnight”_

⊳Jisoo

“ _yeah itll be fun”_

⊲Jeonghan

_“Ok sure. Should I meet you there?”_

⊳Jisoo

_“yeah ill leave now”_

⊲Jeonghan

_“Ok”_

⊳Jisoo

And there Jisoo was, sitting on a swing when Jeonghan finally arrived.

“Hey,” Jeonghan said.

“Hey,” Jisoo replied with a smile, his legs barely moving enough to sway himself. Jeonghan thought he looked cute. Well, Jeonghan always thought he looked cute. But especially cute right now.

Jeonghan took a seat on the swing next to him, sat for a short minute before speaking up. “Hey, can I sit with you?” he asked Jisoo from the swing next to him.

“You’re already sitting with me?” Jisoo asked.

“No,” Jeonghan got up from his own swing and moved closer to Jisoo, putting his hand on the chain on top of Jisoo’s, “Can I sit with you?”

“I don’t think that’s how this works,” Jisoo said, a nervous laugh escaping his lips.

“Let’s try,” Jeonghan smiled before trying to crawl into Jisoo’s lap. He situated himself with his legs crossed behind Jisoo’s back, hands on top of where Jisoo’s were on the chain. Jeonghan spent a moment just taking in Jisoo’s features. The soft curve of his cheekbones. His full lips. He leaned down to kiss Jisoo, hair making a small curtain around both of their faces. Jeonghan tried to remove one of Jisoo’s hands from the chain to guide Jisoo to place it on Jeonghan’s hip instead.

“We’re gonna fall if I don’t hold on,” Jisoo said nervously, pulling away from Jeonghan’s lips

“I’ll hold the chain, don’t worry. Just trust me,” Jeonghan said. Jisoo should have known that whenever those words left Jeonghan’s lips, there was sure to be trouble. But Jisoo did as he was told, and tried to replace his grip from the chain to Jeonghan’s sides, holding him a little too firmly, but Jeonghan liked it that way. Jeonghan was trying to ease Jisoo’s nerves by deepening their kiss, tongue licking in to Jisoo’s mouth.

And just when Jeonghan thought Jisoo was starting to relax, he felt himself fall forward on top of Jisoo. Jeonghan was about to laugh about how stupid that was, but he noticed Jisoo wasn’t laughing.

“ _Holy fuck_ ,” Jeonghan whispered when he realized Jisoo had passed out. Hitting your head on the ground from a fall of a few feet probably wasn’t good for the brain. Jeonghan immediately got his phone out of his pocket and started dialing.

“Hey, uhm, Jisoo is passed out. He might have a concussion. What do I do?” Jeonghan asked frantically.

“Uhm, maybe call 911 and not me?” Wonwoo offered.

“No, then they’ll ask me what we were doing for this to happen and I can’t tell them.”

“What _were_ you doing?” Wonwoo asked.

“We were trying to make-out on the swings, but Jisoo fell off. Anyways, just get to the park so I can get him home.”

“ _Fiiiine._ But what were you doing at the park with him anyways in the first place?”

“We were gonna make out on the swings, don’t you ever listen to me?”

“I’ll be there soon.”

 

 

 

Jihoon did not show up to Mingyu’s frat.

He was thinking about going. Well, Jeonghan threatened him into going. And he could use the free alcohol.

But he got a text from Seungcheol after class.

_“Hey do you wanna go to the grocery with me?”_

⊳From Seungcheol

“ _No.”_

⊲Jihoon

“ _C’mon. It’ll be fun”_

⊳From Seungcheol

“ _How will the grocery be fun?”_

⊲Jihoon

_“I’ll buy you alcohol”_

⊳From Seungcheol

_“When will you pick me up?”_

⊲Jihoon

_“15 mins”_

⊳From Seungcheol

So Jihoon was sitting in the passenger seat of Seungcheol’s ugly truck. Jihoon wanted to roll the window down, to feel the cool air, but he didn’t want to make the effort to roll the window down. There was some song playing softly through the speakers. Something to fill the silence between them.

The ride to the store wasn’t long. It was a trip Jihoon usually walked by himself when Seungcheol didn’t drive him. He really didn’t need a ride when Seungcheol offered. He didn’t really want to go to the store with him now. But he couldn’t get alcohol without Seungcheol buying it, (not unless he wanted to traverse Mingyu’s gross frat party for a few shots) so he convinced himself it would be worth it.

The two walked around the large supermarket, Seungcheol picking out a few things, Jihoon silently following close behind, watching Seungcheol’s hands as they examined products, putting them in his basket.

“I’m so glad that you decided to come out with me today. It’s like going on our own little dates,” Seungcheol smiled as he moved to walk next to Jihoon throughout the aisles.

“Going to the grocery store together is not a date. Especially when the only reason I’m here is to get alcohol,” Jihoon said, mumbling his words.

“Then why don’t we go on actual dates?” Seungcheol asked, oddly optimistic. He had stopped walking now and was choosing to look at Jihoon instead.

“Because we’re not dating,” Jihoon replied.

“The only thing keeping us from dating is us going on dates—technically speaking,” Seungcheol added. “We’ve got the rest down.”

“Us fucking does not constitute a dating relationship,” Jihoon replied, volume a little higher now. The woman with a young child sitting in her cart couldn’t help but look over at the two, giving them some sort of stern look before pushing her cart, and her child, away from the couple.

“Then what would?” Seungcheol asked, quieter to not attract more attention.

“If we loved each other,” Jihoon said, slightly too harshly.

It halted the momentum of their conversation. Just enough for Seungcheol to take a second to pause before speaking again. “Look at Jeonghan and Jisoo—those two don’t love each other. But they still go on cute little dates,” Seungcheol offered.

“Those two are fucking weird,” Jihoon replied. “I’m not basing decisions about relationships off of them.”

“Well, they’re weirdos who go on dates at least,” Seungcheol whined.

“Why do you want to go on dates so bad anyways. What is it about being out with the horrible public, eating over-priced shitty food that makes you think dates would be cute,” Jihoon asked in that matter-of-fact tone of his, staring at the food on the shelves.

“Because we would be doing it together,” Seungcheol smiled, hand reaching for Jihoon’s, rubbing small circles into the back of his hand.

Jihoon sighed, turning away from Seungcheol’s gaze, looking now at his hand inside Seungcheol’s. “If I go out a date with you, you have to take me to a fancy restaurant, and you have to pay for my meal,” Jihoon offered.

“That’s what a date entails,” Seungcheol smiled.

“Does it entail you eating me out afterwards,” Jihoon asked in that declarative way of asking things. Cue another mother dragging her child away from the two who decided to have this conversation in the soup aisle.

“It can,” Seungcheol replied.

“Good. Now buy me a bottle of tequila before I change my mind,” Jihoon said.

 

Jihoon was waiting outside the liquor store for Seungcheol to return. (He would raise too much suspicion if he went along with Seungcheol. A red flag, as many liquor store owners would say.) He was regretting telling Seungcheol he would go out with him. Just going to the grocery with him was torture enough.

But being with Seungcheol wasn’t torture—it wasn’t like that. Being in public was the torture. It drained him. He could just invite Seungcheol over—or go over to Seungcheol’s. But he wanted the free food.

If Jihoon wanted to make plans with anyone, he had to make them quickly enough he couldn’t overthink it, so he couldn’t regret making them. Jihoon had to be spontaneous with plans, or else he would dread them. He wanted to be with Seungcheol before his mind told him it would be a bad idea—he wanted to enjoy being with Seungcheol. Maybe he did want to go out on dates with Seungcheol. But something deep in his core told him he didn’t. Jihoon listened to it.

Seungcheol exited the small store, the little bell on the door signaling to Jihoon his return. “They had the one you liked,” Seungcheol told him, fumbling with the paper bag which apparently held a few bottles.

“Can I come over your place?” Jihoon asked, eyes focused on Seungcheol’s.

Seungcheol widened his eyes slightly, “Now? I mean, yeah, of course, really?”

“Yeah, I want to,” Jihoon said.

“Okay, let’s go,” Seungcheol said, smiling.

In Seungcheol’s truck, with groceries at his feet and on his lap, Jihoon hoped he could fool himself into not regretting making these plans. He wanted to enjoy himself for once, not dread it.

 

“What did you want to do?” Seungcheol asked from behind the small kitchen island, placing groceries on the counter.

“Let’s just watch a movie or something,” Jihoon replied, seated on Seungcheol’s dingy couch that was actually really comfortable. The padding of the seats was worn from use and hugged whoever sat in them. Seungcheol’s dog, Sidney, was making himself comfortable on the couch with Jihoon, Jihoon petting him gently.

“Okay, do you want a drink or anything?” Seungcheol asked, grabbing for the bag from the liquor store.

“No, just water,” Jihoon replied, allowing Sidney to climb into his lap, basically crushing Jihoon under his weight.

Seungcheol made a surprised little hum, but smiled. He carried two cups of water over to the couch, handing one to Jihoon and placed the other on the coffee table. He tried to place it out of reach of Sidney’s swinging tail.

“Is this the date? Because I didn’t buy anything nicer than spaghetti.”

“That’ll be fine.”

“You’re wearing your knee brace again,” Seungcheol said with a worried frown. He could see the outline of it under Jihoon’s jeans, where his knee was bent.

“Yeah,” Jihoon mumbled, looking down at his own knee. “It’s nothing. Just a precaution. After what you said at practice.” Jihoon could tell that didn’t make Seungcheol feel any better.

“Does it hurt when you play?” Seungcheol asked.

“Let’s just watch something,” Jihoon added, trying to change the subject.

After staring at Jihoon for a moment, disappointed that he wouldn’t talk, Seungcheol gave up. “What did you want to watch?” he asked when he was seated in the spot that Jihoon and the dog weren’t taking up.

“Anything,” Jihoon hummed.

Seungcheol knew it didn’t matter what he picked for them to watch. Jihoon fell asleep through anything. Even Seungcheol’s favorite movie that involved giant tanks and a lot of fire. Seungcheol had told him he couldn’t possible fall asleep though it—there were too many explosions. But when Seungcheol turned to Jihoon at one of his favorite parts, to see what Jihoon thought, he was passed out. Incredible.

So Seungcheol picked something on Netflix they both had seen before, knowing it wouldn’t matter much. Seungcheol got up after he made the selection, to fill the dog’s bowl with a little bit of food so he would leave Jihoon alone, and returned to make himself comfortable next to Jihoon.

And it didn’t take long before Jihoon was asleep, leaning against Seungcheol’s shoulder, quietly breathing against his skin. The dog had returned to cuddle up next to Jihoon, head on his lap. Seungcheol smiled to himself as the movie ended, too worried to get up for the remote as it might wake Jihoon. But it didn’t matter because against his shoulder Jihoon spoke up to say, “Aren’t you gonna play another one?” in a voice still riddled with sleep.

“Are you gonna sleep through it?” Seungcheol smiled.

“Yeah,” Jihoon said.

“How can one person sleep so much?” Seungcheol chuckled, moving to get the remote.

“I like sleeping at your place,” Jihoon mumbled when Seungcheol left his side.

“Am I not entertaining enough to keep you awake?” Seungcheol smiled at Jihoon when he settled back in with the remote.

“It’s not that,” Jihoon said, a little louder than a whisper. Seungcheol knew by now that when Jihoon spoke softly, it was because he was being serious. Seungcheol would poke fun at him if he didn’t know that Jihoon was trying to tell him something he usually wouldn’t. “I sleep the best here,” he mumbled.

“In that case,” Seungcheol started. He rearranged them, first placing Jihoon at the end of the couch before repositioning himself so that he could pull Jihoon on top of himself as he laid down on the couch. “Sleep,” he said, wrapping his arms around Jihoon’s waist.

Jihoon smiled against Seungcheol’s chest. A faint smile, Seungcheol would have missed it if he wasn’t watching Jihoon’s face carefully.

Good thing he was always watching Jihoon carefully.

 

When Jihoon woke, the two of them ate shitty spaghetti and Seungcheol ended up keeping his promise.

After he dropped Jihoon off at his apartment, Seungcheol texted Jeonghan.

“ _Are you free?”_

⊲Seungcheol

_“im waested”_

⊳From Jeonghan

_“Im coming over”_

⊲Seungcheol

In the dingy bathroom, body flush with Jisoo’s, Jeonghan said, “I have to go home,” against Jisoo’s skin.

“Is everything okay?” Jisoo replied breathlessly.

“Yeah, it’s just Seungcheol,” Jeonghan said, putting his phone back in his pocket. “I think he has juicy gossip and I need to be home to hear about it.”

“So you’re ditching me?”

“Don’t say _ditching._ Say _leaving you for more important obligations.”_

When Jisoo frowned, Jeonghan offered, “I’ll walk you home and everything. _God,_ ” he sighed.

“Well, thanks.”

 

Waiting for Seungcheol to come over, Wonwoo and Jeonghan decided to put on a movie. Otherwise, Jeonghan would pass out for 8 hours straight and at least Wonwoo could tell Seungcheol wanted somebody to talk to.

“You know I hate scary shit,” Jeonghan whined as Wonwoo picked the movie from his laptop screen.

“It’ll be fun. We can even make a drinking game out of it. Take a shot every time you feel like you’re gonna shit your pants,” Wonwoo grinned.

“We’re gonna need more alcohol,” Jeonghan replied. “And I’m gonna need a new liver.”

Wonwoo picked to watch _The Ring._ Well, actually _Ringu_ because he was convinced it was less scary if you couldn’t understand what they were saying. Jeonghan told him he wasn’t going to watch the Japanese version without subtitles. And Wonwoo groaned, telling him without the subtitles it would be less scary because they wouldn’t know what was going on. But Jeonghan got his way—like he always did. (Jeonghan was honestly too wasted to figure out what was going on anyways.)

And about 20 minutes into the movie, Wonwoo and Jeonghan pressed close on their shitty loveseat, blanket draped over Jeonghan’s knees where they were brought close to his chin, there was a loud knock on their apartment door. Being the rational human beings they were, Wonwoo and Jeonghan were convinced this was their death, and screamed at the sound.

“It’s just me, you fucks,” Seungcheol yelled from their apartment hallway.

“How do we know you’re not the ghost?” Jeonghan asked.

“What ghost? Are you guys watching the _Ringu_ again? That shit’s not real,” Seungcheol yelled again.

“Hmmm, that sounds like what the ghost from _The Ring_ would say to gain entry into our home before killing us,” Wonwoo said.

“I’m going back home,” Seungcheol sighed.

But Seungcheol did not go home. When Jeonghan stumbled to the door to let him in, Seungcheol turned off the _Ringu_ to try to have a rational conversation with a drunk person and a drunker person—Wonwoo and Jeonghan respectively. Which led to them having a serious conversation about Seungcheol’s shitty life; well, his shitty romantic life (he argued that his life was above shitty in all other aspects. Wonwoo disagreed).

“So why Jihoon anyways?” Jeonghan asked.

“I don’t know. He’s honest, and funny,” Seungcheol began to explain.

“ _I’m_ funny and honest,” Jeonghan interrupted.

“Yeah, but in the douchebag way,” Seungcheol chuckled.

“You’re telling me Jihoon isn’t a douchebag? He’s like the team douchebag representative,” Wonwoo added.

“You only say that because you’ve never actually taken the time to talk to him. He’s actually really nice.”

“Tell me, when has he ever been nice? Like, an example,” Jeonghan demanded, sobering up a little from the water Seungcheol was making him drink.

“He holds my hand sometimes when we’re together,” Seungcheol said, blush creeping onto his cheeks.

“Well, excuse me. He holds your hand. The kid’s a saint,” Wonwoo scoffed.

After a moment of Wonwoo feigning disinterest in the topic, he spoke up again to say, “Is it because he has really good goalie thighs? Like can he ride you for 2 hours or something?”

Seungcheol spit out his water and got up. “That’s it. We’re not talking about this anymore!”

“Well, can he?” Jeonghan asked.

“Why do I bother trying to confide in you two?”

“I’m just asking that if I challenged him to do a 30-minute wall sit for 20 bucks, and he could do it, you wouldn’t think it was hot?” Wonwoo asked.

“Fuck off.”

“Is that a yes?”

“Is that where he was instead of joining my drunk justice league tonight?” Jeonghan asked.

“I’m leaving.”

“I’m interested!!” Jeonghan whined.

 

 

 

“Thanks for walking me home,” Vernon smiled.

“I figured with Seungkwan leaving early you’d want someone to remind you where you lived,” Minghao replied. “You really shouldn’t bring up his Intro to Gov grade when he’s drunk—you know how emotional he gets about that stuff.” He took both of Vernon’s hands in his own, rubbing Vernon’s knuckles.

“He was being a bitch,” Vernon groaned, but still smiling, eyes cast downwards at his hands in Minghao’s.

“Can’t he hear us?” The two of them were standing right outside Vernon and Seungkwan’s dorm.

“Chan probably tucked him into bed already. He’s probably been sound asleep for at least an hour.”

“I had fun tonight,” Minghao smiled.

“Me too.”

Vernon leaned in and placed a chaste kiss to Minghao’s cheekbone.

Minghao gave Vernon’s arms a gentle tug where he was still holding Vernon’s hands in his own to bring their lips together for just a moment in the empty hallway.

“I really like you.”

“Me too.” **  
**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everyone gets fucked 
> 
> go read nonbinarytaemin's fics


	12. "I'm excited to see you again."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Watch as Jeonghan ruins everything. As per usual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> henlo  
> its been a while since i updated and a lot of things happened since then  
> sorry if my updates arent fun anymore  
> idk what im doing to this fic
> 
> this chapter is weird and disjointed but i am doing what i can
> 
> also happy anniversary to this fic and 2 years with seventeen!!

Jeonghan’s job in the library came with limited perks. Convincing the kids who worked in the café downstairs that library workers got free coffee was one of them. But another one was that just about everyone frequented the library. And that meant he never had to go looking for someone when he needed something from them. They came to him. Especially as finals were drawing nearer.

Seeing Seokmin at a table surrounded by notes and textbooks was like striking gold for Jeonghan.

“You have access to everyone’s personal information, right?” Jeonghan asked, loudly clapping his palms to the surface of the wooden desk Seokmin was occupying.

After he gathered his composure from Jeonghan’s surprise attack, he replied, “As the treasurer of the team, I cannot give you any information that could cause harm to a teammate.”

“Relax, I just want to know when Jisoo’s birthday is. I want to get him something.”

“Can’t you just ask him?”

“No, I feel like he told me before, but I wasn’t really listening. I think he said it was in winter. Doesn’t he look like a winter to you? I’ll look like an ass if I ask him,” Jeonghan rambled.

“You  _ are _ an ass.”

“Can you get the info for me or not?”

“Yeah, I can look it up for you in the team records.”

“We have team records?”

“It’s just a binder with everyone’s signature on a document that says they won’t sue the school if they get hurt or die playing on the team. You’re the safety officer, don’t you know where the binder is?”

“Listen, I am very busy.”

Seokmin sighed. “I’ll look it up for you.”

“Thanks, you’re the best. Anyways, study hard. Do well in school. Eat a green thing,” and Jeonghan was off to the stacks to pretend to do his job for another 54 minutes until his shift was over.

 

The next night at practice Seokmin met Jeonghan at the water bottles during a break between drills to share the information on Jisoo he gathered for him.

“December 30th,” Seokmin started.

“What?” Jeonghan asked, lowering the water bottle from his lips.

“Jisoo’s birthday—you asked for it.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot I did that. When did you say it was again?”

With a sigh, Seokmin repeated, “It’s December 30th.”

“Damn, that’s over winter break. Guess we’ll have to skip it this year.”

“Just like you skipped everyone else’s birthdays that weren’t your own?”

“I didn’t miss anyone’s birthdays. I know these kids like the back of my hand.”

“You may want to check your hand again because you forgot about Minghao and Jihoon.”

“Forgot what about them?”

“Their birthdays…?”

“Oh, yeah I forgot they had those.”

Quirking an eyebrow, Seokmin asked, “Are you alright?”

“I’m just a little stressed with all the end of semester stuff coming up. I’ve got a lot on my mind; that’s all.”

Seokmin maybe almost felt bad for Jeonghan, and almost forgave him for forgetting everyone’s birthdays until he caught a familiar metallic smell hanging on Jeonghan’s breath.

“Are you drunk?”

“I may have had a drink before practice,” Jeonghan responded.

When Seokmin gave him an accusatory look, Jeonghan added, “It helps me relax.”

“Just don’t get carried away, okay?”

“This isn’t my first rodeo, Seokmin.”

 

*

 

The sophomores hadn’t forgotten Minghao’s birthday a few weeks back. They even invited Chan to celebrate it with them in the dining hall. (Chan thought it was a little cheap to celebrate someone’s birthday in a university dining hall, but Seungkwan said it was economical since none of them had to pay out of pocket to get the weird slices of yellow cake they served by the desserts) The four of them filled a small round table and sang quietly to Minghao so no upperclassman would make fun of them. Being the patient and understanding kid he was, Minghao didn’t care much about the venue; he appreciated that his friends remembered to celebrate with him.

Seungkwan egged Minghao on to make a wish.

“But there’s no candle to blow out,” Vernon snapped.

“The candle doesn’t make the wish come true—it’s the belief in birthday magic that makes it come true,” Seungkwan told him.

“That sounds like a load of bullshit.” But as Vernon said it, Minghao clasped his hands together and let his eyes fall shut for a moment, obviously thinking of a wish.

Releasing his hands and opening his eyes, Minghao said, “Okay, done.”

“What did you wish for?” Chan (naively) asked.

“You can’t ask someone what they wished for or else it doesn’t come true!” Seungkwan scolded him.

“I feel like you’re making up a lot of rules here…,” Vernon said under his breath, but obviously loud enough for Seungkwan to hear and reach over the table to try to smack him, causing Vernon to meet him halfway to hit him back. Chan and Minghao were left to stare at each other and their sad cake as the other two scrambled to land a hit. It was a nice way to spend a birthday (not much different from their usual get-togethers).

 

When Vernon walked Minghao back to his dorm after the celebration, he asked, “So what did you wish for? I guess you don’t have to tell me if you’re worried it won’t come true or anything….”

“I wished you would go skating with me on Wednesday, when we’re off of class, you know?” Minghao said.

“You want to spend one of the only days we don’t have practice skating anyways?” Vernon said in a groan he didn’t try that hard to hide.

“It’ll be fun if it’s just us two,” Minghao smiled.

And with that smile, Vernon was hooked. His body agreed before his mind could tell him that embarrassing himself in front of Minghao at a stick-and-puck would probably be very not-fun. Minghao could have told Vernon he wanted to rob a bank, and with a smile like that, Vernon would have agreed in a heartbeat.

 

On Wednesday, after spending about 56 minutes having Minghao skate circles around him and trying to teach him how to lift a puck off the ice with a slap shot, Vernon was at the sink in the entirely too filthy locker room bathroom, splashing his face with water to cool down from all the skating (or the red hot embarrassment of skating with just Minghao).  

Enter Minghao, sans shirt. Vernon would never understand how Minghao could play hockey without a shirt; he always got so cold on the ice he had to wear a t-shirt under his pads to not catch a cold on the ice. And he’d never admit it, but Vernon liked watching Minghao after playing, peeling off his jersey and shoulder pads to reveal his bare skin underneath. He looked so cool and professional. He probably shouldn’t watch teammates undress in the locker room, but Minghao made it hard for him. Minghao made everything hard for him (and no, that’s not a dick joke).

 

There was something about Minghao that drew Vernon to him. Maybe it was because Minghao was the coolest person Vernon knew who willingly hung out with him. Even when Vernon let Minghao’s skateboard get run over when he was trying to teach him how to ride it, Minghao still wanted to hang out with him, to teach him other things, like how to steal a helicopter in GTA.

The two met when Vernon and Seungkwan went to try out for the hockey team (technically they weren’t really try-outs because everyone who wanted to join the team got a spot—even with no experience). Vernon figured he would probably quit after the first practice, when him and Seungkwan decided that staying alive to experience their first semester of college was probably more important than dying trying to learn how to skate.

Vernon remembered bits and pieces from that first practice. He tried to suppress most of it as the sheer embarrassment was pretty scarring for his mental well-being. But he remembered when the other freshman who came out to join the team introduced himself as Minghao and said he had never played before but was interested in learning.

Vernon could tell the older players were not too keen on the fact that all their new recruits had never skated before. But Vernon was happy to have another person who would probably look as stupid as him and Seungkwan did as they all tried to learn together. Sadly for Vernon, the team was captivated by watching Minghao hit the ice for the first time as he seemed like his feet already knew how to skate (and had known for years). It gave Vernon hope he could learn as quickly, to look that cool skating.

Apparently Minghao was one of those kids who joined teams just to see how long it would take him to learn the sport. He grew up doing dance and playing soccer. He joined baseball in middle school, tried basketball in high school. Minghao was looking for a sport that would keep him entertained during college, and Vernon figured hockey must have been it (basically being the only sport the kid seemed to not have tried yet), since he kept coming back to practice and he and Seungkwan did the same (not without Vernon having to convince Seungkwan to return—maybe as just a chance to see Minghao again—maybe).

 

Minghao moved so he was behind Vernon, looking at him through the mirror. “Hey, you’re really getting better,” Minghao smiled.

“Do you think so?” Vernon asked shyly, turning to look at Minghao (bad choice) and running a hand through his wet bangs to get them out of his eyes.

“It’s only been a year but you’ve improved so much,” Minghao added, taking a step closer.

“But you’re so much better than me and you’ve only been playing as long I have,” Vernon frowned, turning away from Minghao’s face. “I look so shitty compared to you,” Vernon added, back against the sink now, wet palms resting uncomfortably on its rim.

“I’ve also been dancing my whole life, which helps. It’s easy to find my balance on skates when I’ve been practicing it for nearly 18 years,” Minghao said, trying to make Vernon feel better with a chuckle.

“That still doesn’t make me feel better,” Vernon pouted.

Minghao moved even closer so he could face Vernon, “What would make you feel better?”

Vernon leaned back further, hands gripping the sink tightly now for support, lower back digging into the cold edge of the porcelain. He was nervous. Minghao always made him so nervous. It didn’t help that when Vernon tried to inch away from him, Minghao moved in closer, threading his arms around Vernon’s body so that his hands were over Vernon’s, chests flush against each other’s—Minghao’s bare one against Vernon’s clothed one.

Vernon didn’t want to move though. He hadn’t taken off his skates yet, basically ditching his jersey and chest pads to wash off his face in the bathroom. Minghao had taken his off, only left in blocky pants, socks, and shin guards. Vernon was scared that if he tried to step away from Minghao, he may step on his bare feet with those sharp blades. He wasn’t even sure if that was keeping him from moving away from Minghao, or the fact that Minghao was bringing their faces closer together. Maybe he wanted to stay, just to see what was going to happen. The skates did give Vernon an inch or two on Minghao, which he liked. It made him feel like had power over Minghao—which he didn’t.

It was when Minghao brought his face to Vernon’s, to take Vernon’s lips with his own for only a moment, that Vernon knew he really didn’t have any power over Minghao.

It was a short kiss, just a brief chaste kiss on the lips, followed by Minghao ruffling Vernon’s damp hair and telling him, “Stop worrying so much.”

And Vernon was frozen, hands plastered to the dingy bathroom sink, forced to watch Minghao leave the bathroom, but not before saying, “What did you actually wish for?”

Minghao stopped and turned back towards Vernon whose cheeks were blooming a beautiful shade of pink.

“For your birthday, y’know? What was your real wish?”

Minghao’s expression softened. “I wish that you’d be my boyfriend,” he smiled.

Vernon wished he could melt into the floor.

 

*

 

Seeing that Jeonghan was occupied with Seokmin, Wonwoo decided to get some information of his own during their water break. 

“You do computer shit, right?” Wonwoo asked, choosing to lean against the goal post while Jihoon was fetching his own water bottle from the back of the net.

“Yeah,” Jihoon answered, lifting his facemask to the top of his head. Maybe so he could talk to Wonwoo more easily, but mostly likely just so he could just get a drink.

“So can you hack my professor’s computer and get me the answers for our final?”

“No, but I can hack the school records and change your name to Shitstain McGee.”

“C’mon, why do you gotta be like that? Don’t they teach you how to do this stuff in your classes?”

“I can’t get access to your random professor’s laptop. It’s not like an email account. There’s no way for me to get a hold of a file on a distant computer, Shitstain.”

“Okay, fine. But promise me you won’t actually change my name to Shitstain?”

“I cannot.”

Wonwoo was about to skate away defeated but remembered a conversation he’d had earlier. “So one more question.”

“Sure,” Jihoon mumbled with annoyance between sips of water.

“How long can you do a wall-sit for? Like, in minutes.”

Mouth full of water, Jihoon knit his brows together in confusion. “Why the hell?”

“Just answer me,” Wonwoo said, cutting him off.

“I don’t know. We haven’t done them in forever. Maybe 10, 15 minutes? I’d imagine I’d get bored by then.”

“Ok, thanks,” Wonwoo replied. He turned towards the coaches and shouted, “Hey! He said he could hold a wall-sit for 15 minutes!!”

The team turned toward Seungcheol and collectively wondered why he was getting so red in the face.

 

*

 

Jihoon was probably thankful that Jeonghan didn’t know when his birthday was. That guy really didn’t need another excuse to drink. Only a handful of people knew when Jihoon’s birthday was. Obviously not Jeonghan, but Soonyoung and Seungcheol remembered.

Although Jihoon’s birthday coincided with Thanksgiving break this year and most of the university left to go spend time with their families, Soonyoung was still around to give Jihoon a gift before they had to go play in the Thanksgiving tournament. He delivered it in a brown paper bag, but the sentiment was still there.

 

Soonyoung came over and took a seat on Jihoon’s bed when Jihoon let him in, handing the paper bag to Jihoon after he locked the door behind him.

“Was this your lunch from today?” Jihoon asked when he saw the bag with ‘happy birthday’ scrawled on it in black sharpie.

“Just open it,” Soonyoung smiled, swinging his legs back and forth.

Skeptically, Jihoon peered inside and with raised eyebrows he asked, “Shit, is this an ounce?” once he saw its contents.

“I don’t know. I had to eyeball it because Jun made me get rid of my scale. He said it made us look like dealers.”

“You  _ are _ dealers.”

“Only to friends and family. And to special birthday boys. So do you want to break it in or what?”

“Seungcheol was supposed to take me dinner later,” Jihoon said, a little disappointed.

Reaching into his backpack, Soonyoung pulled out a little bottle and said, “That’s why I brought eyedrops.”

“You really are my best friend,” Jihoon smiled.

 

“So where’s Seungcheol gonna take you to dinner?” Soonyoung asked sprawled out in the middle of Jihoon’s floor, fingers running across the carpet.

“I hope McDonald’s. I could eat like 50 nuggets right now,” Jihoon replied, laying on the floor next to Soonyoung, looking at the smoke that was pooled at the ceiling.

“Would it be awkward if I joined you guys?”

“I don’t think so. He likes you. Maybe.”

“How are you guys anyways? Any updates?”

“Same old, same old,” Jihoon sighed with heavy eyelids struggling to stay open.

Soonyoung simply repeated, “same old, same old,” to himself in a voice barely louder than a whisper. “What does that mean anyways? Like same old? That doesn’t sound like a sentence.”

Jihoon turned to look at him with a smile and said, “You’re so fucking high.”

“No, we agreed to lay on the floor so we wouldn’t get really high. You have a dinner to go to.”

“I don’t think it worked,” Jihoon laughed.

“If I was high, could I do this?” Soonyoung asked, remaining motionless.

“Do what?”

“What?”

“What could you do?”

“I could do anything. That’s what my dad told me when I grew up.”

“Too bad you decided to be this,” Jihoon said, and made a half-hearted attempt to motion towards Soonyoung.

“Too bad you decided to be friends with this,” Soonyoung smiled, which quickly faded when he was startled by a rumbling. “Dude, do you feel that? I think your carpet is trying to tell us something. I told you if you dropped any bud the carpet would eat it. Now it’s high—”

“Calm down, I think it’s just my phone.”

After a moment of letting the ground continue to rumble, Soonyoung asked, “Are you gonna pick it up?”

“Oh, yeah,” Jihoon said, and rolled over to where his phone was sitting near the nightstand next to his bed. When he saw the screen, he turned to Soonyoung and said, “It’s Seungcheol.”

“Fuck dude. Don’t pick it up yet, let me get the eyedrops,” and Soonyoung slowly rolled over to try to get to his knees to reach his bag on Jihoon’s bed.

“No time,” Jihoon stated and pulled open the nightstand drawer to reveal a pair of sunglasses. He quickly put them on and answered his phone. “Hello?”

Seungcheol must have asked him about their dinner plans because Jihoon’s next response was, “Can Soonyoung come?” And Seungcheol must have said yes because the night ended with the three of them going to the nice Italian restaurant Seungcheol picked out (read: Olive Garden), buying a bottle of fancy wine and letting Jihoon drink it all, and Soonyoung eating so many breadsticks that he ended up puking in the bushes in the parking lot. Jihoon never even took off his sunglasses.

 

*

 

“So, are you going back home for the break?” Seungcheol asked while the team was occupied fighting over the six bottles between them.

“Yeah. It feels like forever since I’ve seen my family. My mom keeps sending me these texts counting down the days until I get home. She’s getting closer to zero and it feels weirdly ominous,” Jisoo chuckled. “Are you going to see your family too?”

“I don’t have that many vacation days. They’re giving me Christmas Eve to the 26th off, so I’ll probably drive up then to see my parents. I don’t have anyone to watch Sidney because of the holidays though. I’ll have to bring him up which my mom will hate. I don’t even remember the last time I was able to go back home,” Seungcheol said, turning his gaze to watch the team fight over the water.

“I bet they’re really looking forward to seeing you,” Jisoo smiled, and Seungcheol turned back to face Jisoo just to see it in time.

Seungcheol smiled as well, eyes back on the team he wouldn’t be seeing for a month. He wondered if he’d miss them. (Well, maybe not Wonwoo.)

 

 

It was the night before Jisoo would leave for home. He turned in all of his assignments. Hockey was done for the semester. Things were oddly calm for the first time in a long time.

Jeonghan wanted to make sure he got the chance to see Jisoo before he left for a month. So he told Jisoo to meet him at the library at the end of his shift. (And Jeonghan was pissed the library was scheduling him for the late shifts while they were open 24 hours for finals. The place was dead at 1:57 am and he was basically just sitting at the front desk googling shit like “Is there a real difference between lettuce and kale?” and “Health benefits of chunky peanut butter vs creamy,” on the library’s desktop.)

Finally, Jisoo walked through the library doors and Jeonghan’s face finally made a different expression from the bored one he’d been sporting for the last 5 hours and 28 minutes.

“Hey,” Jisoo smiled.

“Hey,” Jeonghan replied, getting up from the desk and coming around to wrap his arms around Jisoo’s waist.

“Why’d you ask me to come meet you here?” Jisoo asked in Jeonghan’s embrace, his arms wrapped around Jeonghan.

“I wanted to make sure I saw you before you left,” Jeonghan smiled. “I was thinking that we should celebrate your birthday. Because I won’t get to be with you for it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’m gonna clock out in a minute and you should come back to my place so we can celebrate. Properly. I used Chan's mealplan to get us ice cream.”

“Let’s go to my place instead for a change,” Jisoo said, his own grasp on Jeonghan loosening.

“What’s wrong with my place? I have my own room. You share a room with that kid who hates me,” Jeonghan frowned.

“He doesn’t hate you, it’s just—never mind, it’s not important right now. I just...I’m not that comfortable going to your place lately. Not if Wonwoo’s going to be there.”

Jeonghan finally let go of Jisoo’s waist, taking a step back. “What’s wrong with Wonwoo? He’s my best friend.”

“That’s kind of the problem. You act so different with him around. You act like you don’t being with me—like I’m some kind of burden,” Jisoo said with downturned eyes.

“I do not.”

“What about last weekend?” Joshua asked.

 

Jeonghan tossed Jisoo on top of his bed, Jisoo muttering, “Is Wonwoo home?”

Climbing on top of Jisoo, he replied, “He won’t bother us,” and connected their lips to stop any of Jisoo’s protests. And he quickly complied, allowing Jeonghan access between his lips with rough kisses.

Jeonghan took Jisoo’s bottom lip between his teeth before obscenely pulling away to begin planting kisses along his jawline, stopping only to nip at his earlobe, hand snaking up Jisoo’s shirt to feel his toned stomach from skating for practically his whole life. Jeonghan loved feeling the muscle under pliant skin contract when he sucked on Jisoo’s neck. Jisoo would complain, saying something about not wanting any marks before seeing his mother, but Jeonghan was doing a good job distracting him from the thought.

When Jeonghan moved the hand that was toying with a nipple to play with the waistband of Jisoo’s jeans, Jisoo’s breath hitched enough for Jeonghan to take notice, and he proceeded to take advantage of his position to rut their hips together, eliciting a moan from Jisoo.

Jeonghan separated from Jisoo’s neck to peel off Jisoo’s shirt, reveling in the expanse of tanned skin not yet covered in bruises (he wanted to change that). He moved his lips to Jisoo’s collarbones, spending enough time for red to bloom along them. Jeonghan moved further, placing open mouth kisses along Jisoo’s torso, his breath growing increasingly labored as Jeonghan neared Jisoo’s jeans.

With Jisoo’s fingers threaded through his hair in approval, Jeonghan undid Jisoo’s jeans, sliding them down to his thighs, and pressed an experimental kiss over his breifs. Jisoo released a shallow breath, tightening his grip on Jeonghan’s hair.

As Jeonghan pulled the obstructive fabric from Jisoo’s skin, Wonwoo waltzed in Jeonghan’s room shouting, “Hey, we’re out of weed.”

Jisoo shrieked and quickly pulled Jeonghan’s covers over his exposed body. “I thought you said he wasn’t home!”

Sighing, Jeonghan said, “No, I said he  _ wouldn’t bother us _ —not that he _ wasn’t home _ . I thought he had some semblance of manners as to not interrupt,” glaring at Wonwoo now.

“This seemed important,” Wonwoo retorted.

“So did me getting some but I guess we have different definitions of what’s important.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have bothered you if you didn’t smoke all our weed,” Wonwoo explained.

Jeonghan sighed out a quiet  _ fuck _ and said, “Well, Jisoo, aren’t you gonna put some clothes on already?”

“Are you kicking me out?” Jisoo replied, a little hurt.

“No, you can come with. But we have to go to Soonyoung’s to get some more,” Jeonghan sighed, pulling on a jacket he discarded on the floor.

“Right now?”

“Yes right now, this is an emergency,” Wonwoo replied in Jeonghan’s place. 

 

“Why’d you bring Jisoo?” Jun asked, packing a bowl for them.

“Why do you think he was over in the middle of the night?” Jeonghan sighed.

“Arts and crafts?” Jun laughed, earning a punch from Jeonghan.

“I wasted a perfectly good night to come here to see you assholes. You better give us an extra gram."

"There are no discounts unless I'm the one you're sleeping with,” Jun grinned.

“Are you guys fucking behind my back?” Soonyoung asked, seemingly genuinely concerned.

“Speaking of hard-ons being wasted,” Jeonghan started, "I bet the only reason Wonwoo wanted to come here to badly—” but was cut off by a pillow hitting his face from Soonyoung’s bed thrown by Wonwoo himself. 

“What? Got any juicy shit to spill?” Jun asked, delighted.

“Please don’t ever use that wording ever again,” Jisoo sighed into his hands.

“Seuncheol’s fucking Jihoon!” Wonwoo exclaimed, trying to move the conversation from his gay crush on his best friend to someone else’s gay crush.

“We already had that figured out though,” Jun groaned.

“Yeah, but Seungcheol totally loves him or something,” Wonwoo added.

“Probably loves fucking him, am I right? With those goalie thighs…,” Jun trailed off.

“Dude, that’s what I said!” Wonwoo agreed.

Soonyoung tried to stay quiet since he’d had the details from day one. He was friend enough to not spill Jihoon’s secrets, but it seemed Wonwoo wasn’t.

“Vernon and Minghao were getting boring anyways. Those two wouldn’t know how to make the first move if they were the last people on earth stranded on a king-sized bed.” Jeonghan added. “I’ll be the first to say that I’m excited for this new development.”

“Do you guys just sit around and discuss everyone on the team’s relationships?” Jisoo asked.

“Of course, and don’t worry, you aren’t being left out—Jeonghan showed me your nudes,” Jun replied nonchalantly.

“Jeonghan!” Jisoo yelped, hitting him on the bicep.

“What? You looked good,” Jeonghan said.

“That’s what I told Jeonghan,” Wonwoo added.

Looking horrified, Jisoo asked, “How many people did you show?”

“Just them, and Seungcheol, and maybe my last project partner….”

“So don’t worry, tonight wasn’t the first time I’ve seen your dick,” Wonwoo said, almost trying to sound comforting, but being Wonwoo, he most certainly didn’t.

“I have to go home,” Jisoo said, getting up from Jun and Soonyoung’s bedroom floor.

“If it means anything, it’s a nice dick,” Jun added while Jisoo was exiting the threshold of their bedroom.

 

“You know I’m just joking. I don’t really mean any of that stupid shit I say. Wonwoo and those guys, they’re just a little wary of you. They don’t like new people, you know. Especially people like you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Calm down. It’s just that you’re like a goody-two-shoes and shit. They gave me so much shit when I first told them I liked you.”

“So instead of telling them off, you treat me like crap when I’m around them?”

“They’re my best friends.”

“That’s the problem with you. Looking cool in front of your friends is more important to you than actually letting yourself be vulnerable with someone else.”

“That’s not true.”

“When was the last time we actually had a meaningful conversation?” Jisoo asked, knowing the answer already. “When was the last time you even were in a relationship that wasn’t centered around sex? ‘Cause I bet—“

“You don’t know anything about me,” Jeonghan interrupted, taking a step back.

“That’s the problem. You don’t let anyone get close to you. And when you do, you push them away. I’m not going to be some fucking past-time or a hobby you do on the weekends. I can’t do this with you anymore if all I am to you is some game you play for a while and ditch when you’re bored. I’m tired of you being with me when it’s convenient for you and your friends.”

“That’s not it at all. Stop acting like you have me all figured out.”

“You're so easy to read, you know that? And I'm not even the one going into psychology.” 

Jisoo sighed. “I’m tired of this. I want to take a break from being your little play thing. I don’t want to do it anymore.”

“Don’t go all Ross on me with that break shit.”

“Then it’s not a break. It’s over…I…I’m just so tired of this,” Jisoo sighed, giving Jeonghan one last glance before walking out of the library, leaving Jeonghan in the entrance alone in the entirely too silent and entirely too empty building.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another update to come very soon since its written already 
> 
> also if u dont get the obvious friends reference ill die


	13. "I'm studying a lot, don't worry"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone's out to celebrate something different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this while listening to p!atd and eating tortilla chips so dont come for me  
> alternative title was "wreck it ralph"

A few days ago Chan (regrettably) came into the café Wonwoo worked at for some much needed caffeine while studying and Wonwoo asked, “Do you know how to drive?” instead of taking Chan’s order.

“Yeah, I have a license,” Chan responded. “Why?”

“Do you wanna be our DD on Saturday?”

“Like, your designated driver?”

“That  _ is _ what DD stands for,” Wonwoo replied, causing Chan to feel embarrassed. “Anyways, are you up to it or not?”

A little too quickly Chan replied, “Yeah, I can do it.”

“Great, come by my place at around 9. You remember where it is, right?”

“Yeah. But Wonwoo?” Chan asked.

“Yeah?”

“Can I please have my coffee?”

“What coffee?”

And that’s when Chan decided he would not try to get drinks from Wonwoo’s café again. And come Saturday, Chan would be promising himself not to associate with Wonwoo at all anymore.

 

Sitting behind the wheel of Wonwoo’s tiny car Saturday night, Chan readjusted the seat, the rearview mirror, and the side mirrors. He thought he was all set to drive some drunk kids around for the night when he noticed the dash was covered by a few stickers.

“Hey, why are these stickers blocking your dash?” Chan asked.

“The little lights were distracting me when I drove at night,” Wonwoo explained from the backseat.

“You mean like the check engine light?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, that one never went off.”

“I don’t think I feel comfortable driving your car.”

“We can’t take Soonyoung’s; his is in the shop.”

“What happened to it? Did it explode?” Chan asked. From what he last saw of the car, explosion was the most realistic thing that could have put it in the shop. (Honestly, it wouldn’t have been a bad idea to send Wonwoo’s car there as well.)

“No, Minghao broke the spoiler off,” Jun said. “I told him it looked stupid with the electrical tape holding it back in place, and super glue didn’t work either. I also told him the car looked stupid with a spoiler but he insists on having it,” he sighed.

Jeonghan was getting more accustomed to Chan’s presence so he began explaining what happened so Chan didn’t have to ask like he always did. “Soonyoung drove down that hill by campus with Minghao skateboarding behind him. He caught too much speed,” he said lazily, scrolling through his phone.

Chan ended up more confused than if he had just asked himself.

“Anyways, you only have to drive us for a little while,” Wonwoo said.

“Yeah, Jun’ll get shit-faced within the hour and we can go home after he makes out with some rando,” Jeonghan explained.

“If you would just take me up on my offer I wouldn’t have to choose a random stranger,” Jun said.

“Isn’t it too early to be hitting on Jeonghan?” Wonwoo asked.

“I thought we were celebrating him being single?” Jun responded. 

“Guys, where am I going?” Chan interrupted.

“Oh, we have to go back to my place,” Jun replied, turning towards Chan now.

“What did you forget?”

“My roommate.”

“Okay, tell me which way to go,” Chan sighed, putting the car in drive to pull out of Jeonghan and Wonwoo’s apartment complex.

“Take a left here,” Jun said, leaning in the front so close to Chan he could practically steer the car himself.

As Chan started down the street, he asked, “How did you forget Soonyoung?”

“He didn’t want to pregame with me and Jeonghan—this left will get you to our place,” Jun pointed. “See the building up there? That’s ours.” He grabbed his phone from his back pocket and reassumed his seat with Wonwoo in the back. “Hey, get your ass out here; Chan’s got the car.”

After ending the call with a short  _ okay _ Jun announced, “They’ll be right out.”

“ _ They _ ?” Chan asked, sounding mortified.

“Yeah, Jihoon’s there. I told you Soonyoung didn’t want to pregame with us so he invited Jihoon over instead. I think Jihoon likes hanging out with the cat. More than he likes hanging out with me, I guess.”

“We can’t fit any more people in this car!”

“He can sit on someone’s lap. C’mon, we never get to go out with Jihoon because he’s too cheap for a fake. The bar rarely does 18 and over nights,” Jeonghan pleaded. “And we’re celebrating.”

“As your designated driver, I refuse to break the law tonight,” Chan stated proudly (and nervously).

“You already failed step one; there’s weed in this car,” Wonwoo told him, sticking his head in between Chan and Jeonghan’s seats.

“Can you get rid of it?” Chan asked, voice raising, maybe out of fear of getting pulled over and sent to jail for possessing marijuana and ruining his life and disappointing his parents and—

“Well, that means we’d have to smoke it and I feel like that’s also breaking rule number one.”

“Okay fine. The weed stays. But Jihoon doesn’t come,” Chan said with as much authority as his nervous body could muster.

“But  _ moooooom _ ,” Jun joked.

“You never let us have any fun,” Jeonghan added.

“I will turn this car around!”

“Isn’t driving around underage drunk guys also breaking the law?” Wonwoo pondered out loud.

Chan sighed in response. It was getting close to finals and he had work to do. He couldn’t believe he was spending valuable study time driving his teammates around so they could get drunk. Maybe their safety was more important than grades. (Or maybe he just wanted to be seen as cool.)

“Okay, after this, no more law-breaking,” Chan said.

“Yes, sir,” Jun replied, spotting Soonyoung bursting from their building’s double doors. “Anyways, it’d be rude not to take Jihoon when he walked all the way over here. You’re really being a pal by picking him up too.”

Strangely (and shamefully) Chan liked being considered a “pal.” He wanted the team to like him. He wasn’t too proud that this is what it took though.

Jun shifted to open the door for Soonyoung, which obviously caught the guy off guard because when his hand reached for a door handle that was no longer there, he stepped off-balance and fell face first in front of the car. Jihoon was right behind him, watching Soonyoung embarrass himself.

“How much did you end up drinking?” Jun asked with a laugh.

Jihoon took his eyes off Soonyoung and directed his all-too serious gaze to Jun. “Yes.”

“Alright, get in and let’s get this party started,” Jeonghan cheered.

Jihoon stepped over Soonyoung’s body (earning a defeated moan from the boy) to take the seat behind Jeonghan that Jun so considerately scooted out of to make room for him.

“Dude, that was my seat,” Soonyoung groaned without even looking up.

“Snooze ya lose,” Jihoon replied, buckling himself in as if that secured his spot.

“C’mon, you can sit with me,” Wonwoo sighed, looking over at his friend who was still on the ground.

Soonyoung finally got up, brushed his knees off, and sauntered to the other side of the car. Wonwoo let him sit in the space between his legs and used his arms around Soonyoung’s waist like a makeshift seatbelt (safety first). There was actually enough leg room for the both of them because Chan had the driver’s seat moved up so much in order to reach the pedals with confidence.

 

The next Chan heard from them after dropping them off was about two hours later when his phone started ringing in the furthest corner of a McDonald’s booth. Chan had driven Wonwoo’s car down the street to the 24-hr McDonald’s to try to get some studying done for his freshman English course. He needed to finish reading some book about something important, he was sure, but he ended up falling asleep, using said book as a pillow. The freshmen apparently had the last finals of the semester because winter graduation or some other important reason why he was stuck studying in a McDonald’s while the upperclassmen were at a bar.

“Hey, little dude, some guy named Jeonghan wants to talk to you.” Chan heard a voice say.

“Five more minutes,” he groaned. It only took him a moment to remember where he was and who Jeonghan was and snap up to look for his phone. A tall employee was standing over him, his phone in hand. “Is that my phone?”

“Yeah. It was ringing for a while,” the employee responded.

“So you answered it?” Chan incriminated.

“Yeah.”

“Just give me it,” Chan sighed. He put the phone to his ear and the employee carried on sweeping the floor. “Hello?”

“Come get us.”

Chan was a little thrown off without a greeting but started to rush gathering his things, nearly spilling over a half-filled coffee cup in the process. “O-okay, I’ll be right there. Is everything okay?”

“No, Jun is getting more free drinks than me.”

“I meant is everyone okay?” he sighed, pausing his previous rush to gather his books.

“Oh, sure, I think so. See you.” And Jeonghan ended the call.

Chan finished gathering his things and threw them back in his bookbag and scrambled to get out the door (having to go back in after he got to the car because he left Wonwoo’s keys in the booth.)

He pulled up to the club entrance where the gang was waiting for him. Jeonghan opened the back seat door and threw a limp Jun in and a surprisingly more limp and giggly Soonyoung next.

“Did you have fun?” Chan asked, trying on his best mom impression.

“Yeah! The guy who does magic tricks was back. I love that guy!” Soonyoung answered cheerfully, as if he had not just been manhandled into the back of the car.

“For the last time, that’s the bartender and it’s not a magic trick, it’s a tap,” Wonwoo said as he closed the door behind himself, rearranging Soonyoung around him. “He really can’t tell you how to get jagerbombs on tap from your kitchen sink.”

Chan was about to put the car in gear when he realized they were missing somebody. “Hey, where is Jihoon?”

“He left with somebody I think,” Soonyoung said, sprawled out across the backseat, legs on Jun’s lap, head on Wonwoo’s who was petting his hair gently, trying to get him to give up on the magic sink trick.

“Do we need to go get him?” Chan asked.

“Dude, no. He’s having a much better time than we are,” Wonwoo explained.

“Not better than I was having,” Jun interrupted. “I was on my seventh free long island.” He said with antagonism.

“Oh, shut up. People just buy you drinks because they think you’re easy,” Jeonghan huffed from the front seat.

“Better than being sober… and ugly,” Jun replied quietly.

Jeonghan turned around in his seat to smack him.

Jeonghan’s swift movement didn’t seem to faze Chan; he was still stuck on Jihoon. “I thought Jihoon was dating Seungcheol….”

“Seungcheol thinks the same thing,” Soonyoung laughed.

 

 

 

After Jihoon’s last final that Tuesday afternoon, Seungcheol invited him over to “celebrate.” The celebration was Jihoon taking a nap with Sidney at his place.

With Jihoon close to him, not on guard like he always was, Seungcheol had time to admire him. His peaceful expression, quiet breathing. Until he noticed something that disrupted the softness that was a sleeping Jihoon. “What are these?” Seungcheol asked, brushing his fingers past the deep purple bruises on Jihoon’s skin.

“Nothin’.” Jihoon shifted so Seungcheol would move his hand from his neck. His voice riddled with sleep.

“Who were you with?” Seungcheol continued, sitting up a little and talking over the movie on the screen. Sidney jumped off the couch from where he was curled up on Jihoon’s feet.

“I don’t know. Somebody. What does it matter?” Tired eyes watching Sidney leave the couch and not on Seungcheol.

“It matters because that’s cheating,” Seungcheol replied, straightening his position on the couch and raising his tone slightly causing Jihoon to sit up as well.

Jihoon stood up from the couch completely with an annoyed sigh, distancing himself from Seungcheol. “No, it’s not. Because we aren’t dating. How many times do I have to tell you before you fucking understand that.” Jihoon said in the way he never asked anything. And he wasn’t looking for an answer this time.

“What is it we’re doing then? If we’re not dating?” Seungcheol stood up to meet his gaze.

“Nothing. Stop trying to put a label on everything. Not everything has to mean something.”

“So you think we’ve just been wasting our time then? Nothing we ever did meant anything to you?”

Jihoon stopped in his tracks, thinking before he spoke.

He had two options. He could admit he enjoyed his time with Seungcheol. He could show a weakness, a vulnerability. He could tell Seungcheol the truth. Only as much as he could understand it himself.

Or he could lie.

“I thought you knew we were just fucking around. Don’t tell me you caught feelings.”

“Of course I fucking caught feelings—I lo—,” Seungcheol began.

“Don’t fucking say that. Don’t,” Jihoon cut him off. “You don’t. Don’t act like you do. You don’t.”

Nobody could possibly love Jihoon. Not with the way he treated everyone. How he kept them all away.

The two stopped and stared at each other. Neither one of them wanted those words to come out. Now they were stuck in a room with them, lingering in the space between them.

“I’m leaving,” Jihoon said, moving to grab his jacket off the back of a chair, he turned to the door and slid his shoes on, trying to escape from them.

Seungcheol stared at him as he moved through the room to the entryway. He was frozen until Jihoon had a hand on the doorknob. “No, wait, I,” he started. “L-let me drive you home.”

“Don’t,” Jihoon said already out the door. He stopped in the doorway and looked at Seungcheol. “Don’t offer me rides. Don’t take me to lunch. Don’t buy me things. Don’t act like you like me—you don’t. Nobody does.” He slammed the door behind him and that was it. Jihoon was gone. 

Seungcheol stood there for a moment. A moment, a minute, an hour. He didn’t know. He didn’t know what he just did.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if youve forgotten  
> sidney is coups' dog  
> not a rando who lives with coups and loves naps
> 
> also i might edit this more later but enjoy the mess while you have it now
> 
> also u can now find me @mnghnsl on twitter!


	14. "No, everything's okay, really."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seokmin throws a team party to remind everyone how much they all get along. Some peoples' memories are worse than others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> howdy yall  
> its me, wonwoo420, with some bullshit
> 
> happy birthday coups!!

“Why wasn’t Jihoon at practice last night? Is he hurt or something?” Chan asked naively.

“No, we’re pretty sure him and Seungcheol fought or something. Didn’t you notice that Seungcheol made us do more laps than usual? Something must be bothering him,” Vernon said, waving a limp french fry in the air.

“Yeah, he’s usually not that much of an asshole when he coaches. My legs are so sore I had to take the elevator down to class today,” Seungkwan groaned, looking a little disgusted at Vernon for waving his food around.

“Don’t you live on the second floor?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, that’s how sore I am,” Seungkwan explained. “Anyways,” he started, “sorry you have to be goalie again this weekend. You were pretty good at it last time we put you in the net.”

“Yeah, you totally blocked some shots!” Vernon cheered. He made it sound a lot more impressive than pucks happening to hit Chan in the chest from time to time.

Chan turned towards his lunch for a moment then looked back at Seungkwan across from him. “Are we going to be able to get Jihoon’s equipment?”

“Yeah, I’m sure Soonyoung can get it for you. He and Jihoon aren’t the ones fighting or anything.”

Chan returned to eyeing his lunch. He didn’t like that the team was fighting. First Jisoo and Jeonghan, now Jihoon and Seungcheol. He wondered if they fought before, or if it was miraculously caused by him joining the team. Part of him knew he wasn’t the cause, but only part of him.

“By the way,” Seungkwan started. “Where’s Minghao?”

“He’s cramming for a quiz,” Vernon replied without skipping a beat.

“It’s the beginning of the semester. How can he already have a quiz?”

“He said this professor is a real hard-ass. He doesn’t know if he’s gonna pass and it’s only a GE.”

“What class is it?” Chan asked, making sure not to put it on his schedule for next semester.

“Intro to Gemstones,” Vernon replied.

“Gemstones!? Why is he taking a class on rocks?” Seungkwan exclaimed.

“He said he likes rocks…,” Vernon mumbled.

Seungkwan let out a frustrated noise but followed it with, “You and Minghao have been attached at the hip lately. What’s up with that?”

“I’m just tired of seeing your ugly face is all,” Vernon replied nonchalantly, not looking up from his lunch.

Seungkwan reached over the table to smack him and Vernon met him halfway. Chan continued pushing around the pasta on his plate, contemplating everything that was going on. He hoped that the team was always this disorganized and it wasn’t his fault. Anyone would tell him that of course it wasn’t his fault they were fighting. All Chan wanted was to make some friends his first year in college.

 

A week later, things were almost feeling back to normal. Jihoon was coming to practice again, albeit not speaking to anyone, and Jeonghan and Jisoo were pretending to be cordial. It was sort of like nothing ever happened. Chan was glad things were almost back to normal because using Jihoon’s equipment to play goalie wasn’t faring too well for the team’s stats. His save average was .73, which wasn’t bad but looked pretty shitty compared to Jihoon’s .925 average. It made him really appreciate having Jihoon back in net.

Despite having Jihoon back and Jisoo and Jeonghan nearly on speaking terms, the team still felt off. Chan must not have been the only one who noticed, because at practice that night, Seokmin had an announcement to make.

“The team has been … a little tense lately,” he started. “I think we need a good old fashioned team bonding party to remember what good friends we all are.”

“I’m not even sure what your name is,” Jihoon stated.

“Okay moving on,” Seokmin continued, a little nervous now. “What do you guys think? Who wants to have a party?” He smiled.

“Will there be booze?” Jeonghan asked.

“No.”

“Then I’m busy,” Jeonghan replied.

“I haven’t even said when it’ll be.”

“When is it gonna be, then?”

“Saturday, after our game.”

“I’m busy.”

“How can you be busy? What did you have planned right after our game?” Seokmin asked, not picking up on Jeonghan’s obstinacy.

“A team party sounds like a great idea,” Soonyoung beamed. “We haven’t had one since before break.”

Seungcheol waltzed into the locker room holding a clipboard (feigning some professional appearance) and Seokmin asked, “Are you gonna come to our team party?”

“I’m busy,” he replied, not skipping a beat or taking his eyes off his clipboard.

“Please?” Seokmin whined.

“Fine, fine, I’ll go to your little shindig,” Seungcheol sighed.

“Please don’t call it a shindig,” Seungkwan complained.

“I vote we  _ do  _ call it a shindig,” Vernon said. Minghao glared at him. “Never mind.”

 

There was a playground just off campus where Wonwoo and Soonyoung smoked from time to time, in the plastic tunnel between the slide and the monkey bars made for kids to play in. Soonyoung and Wonwoo thought it was a good place to smoke because no kids really came by at 1 in the morning when they came back from practice.

“What do you think about the team shindig?” Soonyoung asked, resting his back on the floor of the plastic tunnel with his legs up in the air.

“Don’t—call it that,” Wonwoo sighed.

“ _ Fine, _ the team party?”

“I dunno, why?” Wonwoo replied, smoke escaping his lips.

“I just think Seokmin’s right. It seems like everyone’s been fighting lately,” Soonyoung said, eyes focused on the ceiling of the tube with heavy lids.

“Everyone’s stupid,” Wonwoo said.

“Do you think we’ll ever fight?” Soonyoung said, now turned toward Wonwoo in the all-too-small tunnel.

“No, I don’t,” he said calmly.

“That’s why you’re my best friend,” Soonyoung smiled. “I love you, man.”

Wonwoo just stared down at Soonyoung’s face, wondering what he really meant by those words.

“You have to say it back,” Soonyoung spoke up.

“What?” Wonwoo replied, not paying attention to what Soonyoung was telling him.

“Say ‘I love you' back.’”

Wonwoo paused for a moment, before replying with “I love you too.” Soonyoung didn’t know how much those words meant. “Okay, I’m thirsty, let’s go back to campus and get something to drink,” Wonwoo announced, throat dry. He dumped the ashes out of his bowl and shoved it in his bookbag quickly, trying to leave the space. Maybe before he said something he’d regret.

“Yeah okay,” Soonyoung agreed. He watched as Wonwoo slid out of the tunnel and down the slide. He watched as Wonwoo fell on his ass because he didn’t realize how close the ground was. When Soonyoung went to follow him, he couldn’t move. “Dude, I’m stuck.”

“What do you mean you’re stuck?” Wonwoo asked, still on the ground.

“I literally can’t move. I’m stuck, dude,” Soonyoung said.

“Dude, you’re so high,” Wonwoo laughed.

“Fuck,” Soonyoung laughed. “You’re gonna have to leave without me. I’m gonna die here. In this tunnel made for kids. Oh no, the kids will be so sad. Nobody will ever use this playground again. Maybe my ghost will haunt it. And then people will come back to the playground to do séances with my ghost. Maybe this is a good thing for the playground. Help the playground economy.”

“Dude, what the fuck. Just get down here.”

“Okay.” And with a characteristic thump, Soonyoung’s limp body slid down the plastic slide and onto the hard earth next to Wonwoo at the landing.

“Nice,” Wonwoo stated with a grin.

Soonyoung burst in the campus store with a burning desire to get a milkshake from the fancy milkshake machine (read: the milkshake machine found in gas stations across the country).

Wonwoo watched him approach the machine fondly and went to pick up a pop for himself towards the back of the store. He had Chan report his student ID card lost so Wonwoo could use the original to buy food with Chan’s meal plan, and no, the school hadn’t figured it out yet.

Soonyoung met him at the counter with his prized milkshake in hand and Wonwoo (read: Chan) paid for both of their drinks before heading back to Soonyoung’s apartment. On their way back, they found a really cool-looking bug and sent a video to Jun. They really thought he’d appreciate it.

They sat on Soonyoung’s bed, Soonyoung laying with his head on Wonwoo’s lap, Wonwoo petting his hair gently as he slowly came down from being high while the two watched a movie on Soonyoung’s laptop. Wonwoo couldn’t get Soonyoung’s earlier words out of his head. Soonyoung didn’t love him. That’s not what this was. Not as much as Wonwoo knew. 

The team shindig--rather, team party-- took place at Soonyoung and Junhui’s apartment that Saturday after their game with the cat hiding under Jun’s bed the whole time because she didn’t like all the commotion. Well, she came out when Mingyu dropped off some new toys for her and later when Jihoon came into the bedroom to pet her while he was trying to avoid all his teammates. They liked each other. More than Jihoon like anyone at the party anyways. Soonyoung always offered Jihoon to come over and play with the cat when he sensed Jihoon was upset about something (which was more often than not). Something they couldn’t easily talk out. And it was kind of therapeutic for Soonyoung to watch Jihoon interact with animals. It reminded Soonyoung that Jihoon did have a soft heart in that icy little body of his after all.

“I hope he doesn’t come,” Jihoon mumbled to the cat. She brushed her tail along the underside of his nose, causing him to sneeze. 

“I was right, you know,” Jihoon continued, eyeing the cat as she rubbed along his bent knees.

“I shouldn’t feel bad about this.” The cat sat in front of Jihoon, stared unblinkingly at him with her large jade eyes.

“Fuck,” Jihoon whispered. 

 

Seokmin arrived and ended up bringing juice and jenga, so the shindig was pretty awful. He and Mingyu took the game pretty seriously, effectively annoying the shit out of everyone else.

“I want to go home,” Jihoon mumbled when he was forced to interact with the humans at the party.

“You can’t go home, we’re in the middle of jenga,” Soonyoung instructed him. He wanted Jihoon to be a part of the group, and playing jenga was the only way he knew how right now. Maybe he didn’t know Jihoon didn’t want to see Seungcheol. Nobody knew what they even fought about or even if they actually fought in the first place. Everyone was just guessing at this point. 

Jihoon swatted the brick tower down and announced, “I want to go home.”

Soonyoung stared at the fallen blocks and said, “Well, I can’t argue with that.”

“You’re just gonna leave?” Seokmin asked, hurt. “We still have more bonding activities to do!”

“You heard the man,” Soonyoung replied motioning towards Jihoon.

“Fine! Leave! We’ll bond without you.”

“You always manage to,” Jihoon said after getting up from where he was cross-legged on the floor in front of a toppled tower of wooden jenga bricks.

With the brick tower finally demolished Jeonghan was quick to leave his spot opposite the fallen pieces and escape to the bathroom.

When Jisoo appeared in the hallway outside the bathroom, Jeonghan tried to slam the door on him. “Are you still avoiding me?” Jisoo asked.

“I dunno, you still trying to pinpoint everyone’s flaws?” Jeonghan asked mockingly from behind the door.

“You still drinking to avoid your problems?” Jisoo bit back.

“ _ Aaand  _ there it is,” Jeonghan incriminated as he opened the door again.

“Listen, I was just trying to help you.”

“Well, what if I didn’t ask for any help? You can’t just go around trying to fix people, ya’know.” 

“What if I was trying to fix you because I care about you?” Jisoo asked sincerely.

“I still didn’t ask,” Jeonghan mumbled, pouting. He slid past the door and Jisoo’s body to rejoin the group so he wouldn’t have to talk about this anymore.

Somebody must have told Seungcheol Jihoon left because about ten minutes later he barged in the small apartment with a bottle of rum in one hand, saying, “Who’s ready to get this shindig started?” (Those two were still avoiding each other. Even during their game when Seungcheol was yelling to Jihoon to leave the net so they could have a man advantage, Jihoon pretended like he couldn’t hear him and stayed put. It was better Jihoon didn’t leave the net because their team couldn’t control the puck in the offensive zone to save a life anyways.)

“Thank god,” Jeonghan sighed out of relief. He couldn’t stand one more round of jenga with Jisoo staring at him like that.

“I said no alcohol!” Seokmin whined.

“Yeah, and your party sucks,” Wonwoo sneered, going to where Seungcheol was rummaging for cups in Jun and Soonyoung’s kitchen cabinets.

“That’s because not everyone’s here. We have to commit as a team to have fun!”

“Where’s Minghao and Vernon anyways? They never showed,” Jun asked.

“Minghao said he had a quiz to study for—maybe Vernon is helping him,” Chan mumbled.

“Brrrr—wrong. Minghao already used that excuse. Try again,” Seungkwan said.

“That’s what he told me to say,” Chan replied.

“You should know where Vernon is—you live together,” Seokmin said.

“When I came back from my shower, he wasn’t in the dorm. I assumed he just left before me,” Seungkwan replied.

 

“Follow me. The fence isn’t that high,” Minghao said, fingers curling around the chain-link fence that encircled the soccer field.

“Aren’t you worried about getting caught?” Vernon mumbled, eyes scanning the area, looking for security or cameras.

“ _ I’m  _ not,” Minghao chuckled.

It was about pride now.

“Here, hold my phone so I can get over,” Minghao said, handing his phone to Vernon. He easily scaled the fence after that, Vernon handing his phone back to him through the spaces between the chain. Vernon didn’t know how he was going to follow him. He hadn’t really practiced climbing fences before and he didn’t think he could get over with his palms this sweaty. But the way Minghao was looking at him on the other side of the fence told Vernon he had to follow him.

Vernon barely scaled the fence, losing his grip a few times, but he made it, and Minghao was already moving along, causing Vernon to hurry to catch up.

Minghao made his way under the bleachers opposite the school, so they were hidden from any students walking to their dorms this late at night. With his back to the metal seats, Minghao observed the fireflies amongst the cluster of trees that surrounded campus, sitting under the bleachers, feeling the cool night breeze on his cheeks. Vernon was watching him intently.

“So why did you wanna come out here? I didn’t even know we could get in here after hours,” Vernon said, still a little nervous about being caught.

“So nobody could find us,” Minghao smiled, resting his chin on his knees.

“Why? Are you planning something illegal?” Vernon asked.

“No, just this,” Minghao smiled. He turned towards Vernon and threaded his fingers between the hair on his nape, pulling Vernon’s face close to his before pressing his upturned lips against Vernon’s. Vernon didn’t know what to do with his sweaty hands, and Minghao noticed, so Minghao took one of Vernon’s hands in his own and placed it on the small of his own back, trying to coax Vernon into a more comfortable position.

When Minghao pulled away, Vernon was left breathless. Minghao smiled at him.

“Is this okay?” he asked.

“Y-yeah, it’s  _ very _ okay,” Vernon said, a little laugh on his voice.

“Cool,” Minghao replied. He moved so he was sitting in Vernon’s lap, knees on either side of Vernon’s thighs. “How ‘bout this?” Minghao asked, wrapping his arms around Vernon’s neck.

“Yeah,” Vernon breathed out and Minghao reconnected their lips.

A moment later, Vernon pulled away and interrupted with a small, “Hey.”

“Yeah?” Minghao responded.

“How long do you think this will last?”

“I don’t know, maybe an hour, maybe longer if you don’t interrupt me.”

“No, I mean  _ this _ \--this  _ thing _ .”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“It’s just that everyone else is fighting and I don’t want us to ever fight. Because, you know, I love you--,” Vernon cut himself off.

“You  _ love _ me?” Minghao asked.

“That’s not what I meant--I’m sorry. It’s just that--.”

Minghao smiled at him, brushing Vernon’s bangs out of his eyes. He leaned down and reconnected their lips gently. “I love you too.”

 

“Hey,” Jisoo said when he found Jeonghan sitting outside on the curb. “What’re you doing out here?”

“Waiting for Wonwoo.”

“Mind if I wait with you?”

Jeonghan just shook his head in response, inviting Jisoo to join him.

They sat in silence for a while, just admiring the clear quiet night until Jisoo interrupted the stillness.

“I wasn’t lying, you know,” Jisoo stated.

“About the drinking thing? I know,” Jeonghan replied with a sigh.

“No, about the part where I said I cared about you.”

“Oh.”

“I was only trying to help you because I want you to be happy,” Jisoo explained.

“I  _ am _ happy.”

“No you’re not.”

“This is why we can’t be together. You can’t go around telling me how I’m supposed to feel or telling me what I’m supposed to do. You have to let me make my mistakes.”

“I just don’t want you to make those mistakes if I can help it.”

Jeonghan sighed deeply and stared at seemingly nothing for a long moment. “You’re cute, you know that?” he said with a faint chuckle. 

“But?”

“I didn’t say but.”

“You didn’t have to,” Jisoo replied.

Jeonghan sighed again. “This just isn’t going to work out between us. I’m not a project. I’m a human being. No matter how much you want to try to save me from myself in the end, I’m the one who makes the decisions--no matter how bad they are.”

“Why are you so against getting help?”

“Sometimes you just have to accept that some people don’t want help--even if you care about them.” Jeonghan got up from the curb to walk back to his own place alone. It wasn’t worth it to wait for Wonwoo anyways. Not when he was this close to throwing out all his words and getting back together with Jisoo. Maybe it would be nice to have someone try to fix him. But Jeonghan didn’t want to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know this is weird to ask here but is anyone seeing svt in NA??  
> i dont know how many of my readers live in north america but whos gonna go see the boys
> 
> anyways hope yall enjoyed the bullshit  
> im trying to make u all love mingsol can u tell


	15. "No, thankfully it wasn't actually a death-match."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team heads out to the league all-star game and surprisingly Smash Mouth never plays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im back with this fucking fic omg  
> sorry to all those who have been waiting for it  
> i kinda lost my knack for writing humor and writing stories in general  
> but i hope you can laugh at a few things in here and enjoy the kids

With Jisoo right behind him, Seungcheol waltzed into the locker room after practice, eyes glued to that clipboard of his. Without looking up, Seungcheol announced to the team, “We got some nominations for the all-star and rookie games again this year; however, we need people to come help volunteer to run the box.”

When he was met with an uncomfortable silence and eleven blank stares that Seungcheol hoped were just from a tiring practice, he rephrased: “Who wants to volunteer for the division tournament _and_ get free food?”

Soonyoung looked and Wonwoo and Wonwoo looked at Soonyoung. They were in. It’s not like they were voted to play in the all-star game by the league, so they could definitely spare their Saturday and get some free food and watch some decent hockey.

Chan was looking around the room in between trying to get out of his chest protector, waiting for somebody to explain what they were volunteering for.

“Oh, sorry Chan. I forgot to tell you that the league nominated you to play in this year’s rookie match,” Jisoo explained (no clipboard required).

“Rookie match?” Chan asked, halting the removal of his gear.

“It’s the dumb game the league puts together to play where all the heads of the teams pit their new players against each other in some sort of frosh-fest-death-match. You’d be great for it, actually,” Jeonghan explained from next to Chan, removing his elbow pads.

“So you get _voted_ into the death match?” Chan asked.

“Of course,” Jeonghan replied.

“And who voted for me to go fight to the death?”

“Seungcheol, of course.”

Cue Seungcheol putting his nose to his clipboard in an effort to use to as a shield against Chan’s glare.

“Minghao got nominated for the rookie game too,” Jisoo added.

“Really?” Minghao asked.

“Yeah, even though I heard you played last year, you’re still considered new and all, so the league wants you in the rookie game again. Keep an eye on Chan for us,” Jisoo replied.

Minghao eyed Vernon expectantly with eyebrows raised.

“I’ll volunteer for the thing,” Vernon sighed. Minghao shot him a smile.

“Good, so we got Vernon down to volunteer,” Seungcheol said, flipping through his clipboard as if there was any actual useful information on it. “I need two other people to help me run the box.”

“Us!” Soonyoung exclaimed, raising Wonwoo’s hand with his. “We want the free food!”

“Glad to know where your heart’s at,” Seungcheol said, his voice tired. “Oh, and by the way, the league voted you as a goalie for the all-star game again, Jihoon.”

Jihoon raised his head and quirked his eyebrows a little.

“So there’s an all-star game too?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, like the rookie game, the league gets together and pulls a bunch of guys from all the teams to form, like, super teams that beat the shit out of each other for two hours right before playoffs in hopes of getting the best players from each team knocked out so they can’t play for the rest of the season,” Jeonghan explained once more.  

“Sounds like fun.” Chan grimaced.

“Since we aren’t making playoffs it doesn’t matter if they kill Jihoon or not,” Jeonghan said, earning him a side-eye from said goalie.

“I’m sorry, Jun, but since we aren’t doing well this year, we only got one pick for the all-star team and they voted for just Jihoon,” Seungcheol explained.

“That’s okay. I really didn’t need another broken rib anyways,” Jun replied.

Chan hoped he was joking about the broken rib. (He wasn’t.)

“Are you playing in the coaches’ game again?” Jeonghan asked.

“Yeah, even though some of the other coaches are a little pissed from last year they still invited me to play,” Seungcheol said. “They even asked Jisoo to come.”

“Jisoo gets to come too? Isn’t this the opposite of what they wanted?” Seungkwan butted in.

“Yeah, I don’t get why they complained about too many ‘young’ coaches playing if they were just gonna go ahead and ask us to play anyways.”

“Maybe they want to kill you.” Mingyu added.

“Jeez, don’t say that while Jisoo’s here,” Seungcheol sighed.

Cue Jisoo, eyes widened and pulling at Seungcheol’s sleeve, asking if they were really gonna get killed by a bunch of old hockey coaches in their game.

 

It was 5:06am when Seungcheol pulled up with his truck in front of the dorms. Once he got out, “Hey,” was about all he could manage to say due to lack of sleep.

“Hey,” was about all Chan, Minghao, and Vernon could reply with due to lack of sleep.

“Just throw your shit in the back, okay?” Seungcheol instructed them. “Sorry I’m late. I had to drop my keys off with Jeonghan. Is Soonyoung here yet?”

“Do you see him?” Vernon asked.

“No, and that’s what scares me. I like to know where he is at all times,” Seungcheol said, looking around comically.

“He’s not here yet. He texted me saying he was on his way a few minutes ago, though,” Minghao told him. “Did you pick up Jihoon yet?”

“Yeah, he’s sound asleep in the passenger’s seat. I’ve got him wrapped up like a little goalie burrito and everything. You’re not gonna hear from him until game time.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard from him,” Chan said.

“No, remember when he got all pissed at that game a few months back? I think everyone heard from him then,” Vernon interrupted.

“Don’t let his potty-mouth influence you kids,” Seungcheol said.

“We aren’t kids,” Vernon said.

“You _are_ and I’m so proud of each and every one of you,” Seungcheol replied, reaching over to ruffle Vernon’s bed head.

Finally, headlights appeared, signaling Soonyoung’s arrival.

“Good, he’s here.”

Soonyoung stumbled out of his car and greeted the group of boys with, “What’s up, funky bunch?”

“I hate this day already,” Seungcheol sighed into his palm. “You got Wonwoo in that car, right?” he asked.

“Of course,” Soonyoung smiled brightly. He seemed _almost_ awake.

“Great, let’s get this show on the road,” Seungcheol announced, clapping his hands together.

So Vernon, Minghao, and Chan shuffled into Soonyoung’s backseat after tossing their stuff in the bed of Seungcheol’s truck. When Seungcheol made it back to his truck the boys started off on the hour and a half trip upstate for the games.

“I wish we could just rent one of those vans from the school instead of driving separately” Chan mused from where he was wedged between Vernon and Minghao in the backseat once they were all settled (or, as settled as they possibly could be with the lack of space. Vernon voted Chan as getting the middle seat because he was the “smallest,” which severely impacted Chan’s self-esteem).

“We used to rent those school vans, the ones that can take, like, 10 people, but not anymore,” Soonyoung explained, head craned over the wheel to try to see if there was traffic coming from the left. “The school stopped approving us to rent them because they were pissed we got a flat. Which was not our fault at all. Remember that story?”

“I can’t say that I do,” Chan responded. He remembered the popped tire thing, but not how it happened.

“Somebody totally popped our tire. With like, a knife. It was crazy. It was probably the other team. They got to our van when we were eating lunch before the game,” Vernon added.

“Dude, that’s not what happened,” Minghao butted in.

“It totally is! Who else would fuck with a van with our school’s logo on it right near the rink?”

“It is an odd coincidence…” Soonyoung said to himself.

“I’ll admit it was fun watching Seungcheol try to change the tire,” Wonwoo added.

“He was trying to give us some valuable life lesson—teaching us how to change the tire. But I don’t think any of us were paying attention. He was using Jihoon as a weight to turn the wrench. It was pretty funny,” Vernon said to Chan.

“Anyways, do you really want to share a van with Jihoon?”

“We rode with him once before. Doesn’t he just sleep the whole time?”

“Yeah, but if you ever wake him up, you won’t make it to play your game,” Soonyoung said. “I don’t get how Seungcheol can drive these long distances without anyone to talk to. It really makes the drive feel a lot longer.”

“Maybe Jihoon doesn’t sleep. Maybe Cheol’s just getting road head the whole way to our games,” Wonwoo thought out loud.

“Dude, for an hour and a half? Can you do that for me?” Soonyoung laughed.

“You wouldn’t last longer than 5 minutes,” Wonwoo joked.

“Please, let’s keep all our dick-sucking to the privacy of our own homes,” Vernon groaned.

“ _Our_ dick-sucking? Whose dick have you been on lately?” Wonwoo turned around from the passenger seat to ask Vernon, who turned red at the question.

“Nobody’s!” Vernon shouted back.

“Damn, I’d hate to be them,” Wonwoo mused, obviously thinking of Minghao, who didn’t appreciate it.

“Oh, like you’re getting any!” Vernon shouted back.

“Well, excuse me. Me and Soonyoung spooned the whole night,” Wonwoo retorted. (Soonyoung spooning Wonwoo in his all-too-small twin bed actually made it incredibly hard for Wonwoo to get any decent sleep last night, making it incredibly hard for him to wake up this morning. Hence, why the two were late picking up the kids.)

“That does _not_ count as getting any,” Vernon told him.

 

The five of them were waiting in the rink lobby, staring at the ceiling, the floor, and each other as there was nothing to do yet at 6:44 am. They had lost Seungcheol when Vernon and Wonwoo asked to stop at Taco Bell for their breakfast burritos. Minghao and Chan had to watch solemnly as Soonyoung, Wonwoo, and Vernon downed a combined total of ten burritos. Seungcheol would have told them that breakfast burritos weren’t game day food, so Chan ate a sad protein bar and Minghao ate three of those baby oranges instead. They’re fucking called clementines, but Vernon called them “baby oranges,” so Minghao did too. Seungcheol must have grabbed something to eat too because he wasn’t yet there when Soonyoung’s car arrived.

Finally Seungcheol walked through the automatic sliding doors, a little thankful to get out of the cold into the, well, still quite cold ice rink.

“Dude, you forgot Jihoon?” Soonyoung asked.

“I didn’t forget him—he’s still in the car,” Seungcheol replied.

“So you forgot him _and_ our stuff?” Vernon asked.

“Is it so bad that I wanted to ask how your drive down was before I unloaded the truck?”

“It sucked,” Wonwoo replied. “So, are you gonna bring either of that stuff inside?”

“Don’t call Jihoon stuff,” Seungcheol replied, before going back out to the parking lot to retrieve said stuff.

And then it was round two for Seungcheol’s entrance, carrying Chan’s bag on one arm and Jihoon’s on the other. “Did anyone want to help me, or...?”

“No, not really,” Wonwoo replied.

“Get fucked,” Seungcheol snarled and dropped the bags in the lobby.

“Couldn’t Jihoon help?” Chan asked.

“He can’t figure out how to get out of the goalie burrito. I’m a tight swaddler.”

“I didn’t know you guys were even on speaking terms again,” Wonwoo mentioned.

“I think he just got tired of riding with Jisoo--oh my god,” Seungcheol interrupted himself.

“What’s the problem?”

“We fucking forgot Jisoo.”

“Well, I guess I’ll help with the rest of the stuff,” Minghao said, avoiding Seungcheol who was just standing in the middle of the lobby.

Seungcheol (mainly fueled by anxiety about what excuse he was going to tell Jisoo) did end up following Minghao back out to the truck, Minghao grabbing his bag and all the sticks, and Seungcheol grabbing Jihoon still in the goalie burrito. (Jihoon was not happy about still being in the goalie burrito.)

When all the stuff (and Jihoon) was inside, and after he ran around setting up all the stuff that would have taken longer for him to explain to the kids rather than doing it himself, Seungcheol told everyone the game plan.

“Okay, the rookie game is first, then the all-star’s, and then the coaches’ game. Who wants to score what?” Seungcheol asked Wonwoo, Soonyoung, and Vernon.

“I’ll do the all-star game,” Vernon offered.

“Then we’ll do the rookie game,” Soonyoung said.

Wonwoo groaned, “I’m definitely not awake enough to score yet.”

“I’ll get us some coffee when the café opens,” Seungcheol said.

“Thank god,” Wonwoo added.

“So all three of you have to do the coaches’ game then, since I’ll be playing. Hopefully you’ll learn what to do in the first two games so I don’t have to worry about you fucking it up. Some of those guys take the score pretty fucking seriously for a game that means nothing.”

Vernon, Soonyoung, and Wonwoo all nodded at Seungcheol. Maybe understanding what he was talking about, but maybe not.

“Okay, now that we got that settled, Minghao, Chan, you wanna start getting ready? Here’s the key to your locker room. I already put up the rosters on the doors so everyone should know where to go,” Seungcheol said.

As the two of them were getting ready, players from the other teams started to file into the arena. Seungcheol greeted their coaches who tagged along for the coaches’ game (trying to appease them so he wouldn’t get killed during the game).

 

When it was nearing the first puck drop, Seungcheol made it back to the box where he found Wonwoo sitting alone.

“Where’s Soonyoung?” Seungcheol said, a little worried.

“Calm down, he’s just grabbing a space heater from one of the offices. My dick is gonna freeze off if it stays this cold,” Wonwoo told him.

“Your dick is so weak,” Seungcheol sighed.

Wonwoo was about to retort but Soonyoung was already back with the space heater, his body not quite fitting into the cramped box.

“Can we get another stool in here?” Soonyoung asked after he dropped the heater on the ground (albeit not too carefully).

“The rink only has these two since it usually only takes two competent people to do what all three of us are doing. We can probably find a chair, but it might be too short to reach the desk. Just sit on Wonwoo’s lap for now or something,” Seungcheol said.

“But he’s so boney!”

“Hey!”

“Dude, you’re like the boniest person I know.”

“I’m only boney for you,” Wonwoo replied, blowing a kiss for Soonyoung.

“God, why did you two have to be the ones to score the first game?” Seungcheol said, face in his hands.

“Because we weren’t gonna let Vernon miss out on Minghao’s game by being stuck in here scoring,” Soonyoung said.

“He’ll miss out on Jihoon’s game, though,” Seungcheol replied.

“Yeah, but he doesn’t love Jihoon,” Wonwoo added.

Seungcheol stared at them for a moment, then across the rink to see Vernon in the crowd, anticipating Minghao. “I’m gonna go grab that coffee. Wonwoo, can you take over the music?” Seungcheol asked, getting up from his stool in the cramped space.

“You bet,” Wonwoo replied, fingers already rushing to the keyboard to pull up the next song while Soonyoung snagged Seungcheol’s seat.

“Thanks. I’ll be right back.”

Seungcheol was walking towards the café that was finally open when he heard the telltale sign that he should not have let Wonwoo deejay. And that sign was “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” blaring through the rink speakers at 7:30am for the players to hit the ice to.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Seungcheol sighed, palm to his forehead.

 

Once he made it back to the box, Seungcheol tried to explain to Soonyoung what scoring entailed.“Okay, you have to mark down every time each team gets a shot,” he said, situating their coffees so that they wouldn’t be in the way.

“How do I know if it was a shot or not?” Soonyoung asked.

“If the puck hits the goalie or the inside of the net, it’s a shot.”

“What if--”

“Soonyoung, net or goalie,” Seungcheol instructed him.

“Okay, coach,” Soonyoung smiled brightly before looking down at the tally sheet, ready for the task at hand.

“And Wonwoo, you’re good to play music just from the approved playlist, right?” Seungcheol asked.

“From the playlist, got it,” he replied.

Which he obviously didn’t understand because when the teams each formed a half-moon around their goalies to practice shots, Wonwoo put on “Shots,” by LMFAO, which was most certainly not on the approved playlist.

But after the warm-up, Wonwoo tried his best to stick to the playlist. He actually had good sense for what songs to play when, like playing the Cops theme song every time someone got a penalty. And, eventually giving up and sitting on Wonwoo’s boney lap, Soonyoung tried his best to mark down all the shots. Nobody would really care if he missed a few (the game was pretty exciting, after all). Seungcheol was occupied marking down at what times all the goals, penalties, and time-outs took place (as well as trying to make sure Soonyoung didn’t get too distracted, although he claimed that he was on top of his game, actually taking his Adderall this morning). But a total of 15 goals were scored between the teams, five penalties were dished out, and both teams used their time-outs so Seungcheol was kept pretty busy.

Vernon really did enjoy getting to watch Minghao play. He couldn’t believe how good he was for only have been playing for a year and a half now. When the game was over, he may have been a little over-enthusiastic to see Minghao in the lobby.

“Hey, you played really good.” Vernon smiled.

“Dude, we lost,” Minghao replied matter-of-factly.

“Yeah, but you totally out-skated the other team. I saw you deke those guys and everything. And Chan even got a goal,” Vernon continued. “It sucks that you weren’t on the same line though.”

“We got to talk when the third line was out. He seemed pretty nervous. I think he thought this would really be a death match or something,” Minghao said with a little chuckle.

“I’m glad it wasn’t, and that you made it out alive,” Vernon said.

“Glad to know you’d miss me if I died.”

“I would so miss you if you got killed in the death-match,” Vernon said and added in a quiet voice, “Who else would I kiss behind the bleachers?”

“That’s the gayest thing you’ve ever said to me,” Minghao said smiling, fist bumping Vernon’s shoulder playfully.

“Well, I mean it,” Vernon said, avoiding Minghao’s eyes.

Then Chan finally caught up to Minghao and Vernon. “Hey, did you see our game?”

“Yeah, you were legendary,” Vernon replied, smiling at Chan this time.

“Even though we lost 7-8 I think we still played better than the other team.”

“Totally,” Vernon agreed. “So, I gotta go score the all-star game. Catch up with you later?”

“Yeah,” Minghao said with a smile.

 

So now it was Vernon’s turn to score a game. And Seungcheol was thankful to get rid of Soonyoung and Wonwoo.

The all-stars hit the ice to music not chosen by Wonwoo (Seungcheol chose to do it himself this time) so the game was already going better than the last one. Some players were stretching, but Jihoon wasn’t one of them. Rather, he was sitting on the bench.

“Wait, they’re not starting Jihoon?” Seungcheol asked.

“Uh, I’ve got the roster right here, and it looks _liiiiike_ ,” Vernon paused to eye the paper, “Yep, they’re not starting him.”

“What the fuck. He’s way better than the kid they got out there,” Seungcheol complained.

“Well, that kid’s team is way better than ours,” Vernon added.

“That shouldn’t matter. Jihoon has the skills to wipe the floor with him. Why the fuck is he benched?”

Vernon just shrugged, knowing whatever he said wouldn’t make a difference to Seungcheol.

But when Seungcheol left his stool to exit the box, Vernon spoke up. “Hey—there’s nothing you can do about it. You’re not the one coaching this game, remember?”

“This is ridiculous. I’m not gonna watch this kid lose the game for them.”

“He _was_ voted into the all-star game by the league so maybe he won’t? We played his team before and I think he was pretty good,” Vernon said, trying to calm Seungcheol down.

“Not better than Jihoon. It’s not like they have to be worried about him getting hurt for playoffs. _He_ should be the one playing--he’s got the save average to prove it,” Seungcheol continued.

“Let him sit for once. He’s got the whole game to get on the ice,” Vernon said. After a moment, Vernon spoke up again to ask, “Why do you want him out there so badly?”

“Because maybe I think he deserves a win,” Seungcheol sighed, finally sitting back down on the stool next to Vernon.

Vernon focused his downturned eyes on the roster in front of him and away from Seungcheol’s expression. Maybe he was right. Maybe this was supposed to be the win Jihoon would never get with their team. Maybe, the win he’d never get at all.

“Wait, Seungcheol, look at him,” Vernon spoke up.

“Hm?” Seungcheol murmured.

“He’s on his fucking phone.”

“That bastard.”

“Look, he doesn’t even care about this shitty game. So don’t get so worked up, okay?” Vernon said with a faint smile.

Seungcheol sighed, trying to think Vernon was right. Maybe Jihoon didn’t care about this as much as Seungcheol did. Well, probably no one cared about this as much as Seungcheol did.

Jihoon didn’t end up getting to play at all, which maybe he liked. He paid just enough attention to the game to stop a rogue puck from hitting his all-star team coach in the face with his glove. But mostly he just opened the doors for the skaters after his phone was confiscated by said coach. His team won anyways, which Seungcheol liked. So Jihoon got a little participation medal for being an all-star and everything. Even though he didn’t participate. (Vernon got the honor of giving everyone their medals and only slipped on the ice twice.) But Jihoon could add it to his collection of awards.

 

Next was the coaches’ game. A supposedly good-natured game of ice hockey between all the coaches of the teams in the league. A time to joke around with the guys they’ve been competing against for the last few months. And Seungcheol was terrified. A little less terrified now that Jisoo was here. (Another target besides himself, he thought.)

“You made it,” Seungcheol said nervously, feigning excitement to see him that wasn’t really there.

“Yeah, no thanks to you guys,” Jisoo grunted.

“Okay, hear me out: I am _so_ sorry. You have your own car though, so it all worked out,” Seungcheol said, trying to appease him. “It’s not like you could have rode in the truck and Soonyoung’s car was also full.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jisoo said, dropping his bag on the lobby floor.

“Wonwoo, Soonyoung, and Vernon are gonna score our game so I’ve got them securing the rosters now. Let’s just get dressed and have a good game, okay?”

Jisoo gave him a face but picked up his bag once more with a sigh and followed Seungcheol to their dressing room.

After getting dressed quickly to avoid the glares of the older coaches, Seungcheol hit the ice and started doing laps to some fucking ungodly song featuring someone screaming “disrespect your surroundings.” He was really regretting putting Wonwoo on deejay duty for another game. Jisoo was just standing at the doorway leading to the ice, eyes transfixed on the speakers as if the song would change if he just prayed hard enough.

When Seungcheol looked up, he glanced at the bleachers and nearly tripped over his own skates when he saw Jihoon. He didn’t smile or wave or anything. Just stared at Seungcheol.  

Seungcheol spent most of the game without the puck in fear of being boarded by a 45-year-old hockey coach with an already bad hip and nothing to lose. So not the best game for Jihoon to spectate. Chan and Minghao also watched the game from the bleachers (not sitting near Jihoon, but that was expected); Seungcheol could hear their cheers when he got near the puck from time to time (and their disappointed groans when Seungcheol avoided said puck).

Jisoo was also avoiding most every other player on the ice as he was more afraid to die than Seungcheol was. He did get lucky, though, as a puck that hit him ricocheted into the net, crediting him with a goal (Jisoo would say that the other coaches were trying to pelt him, and Seungcheol didn’t really have anything to say otherwise).

 

Once the game was over (thank god), Seungcheol met up with his team in the lobby. “How’d it go?” Seungcheol asked.

“You did awful,” Soonyoung stated.

“Not the game--the scoring.”

“Oh, were we supposed to do that?”

Seungcheol was about to yell (probably expletives) when Vernon stopped him by saying, “Don’t worry, we got it all down.”

“Remind me to never let you guys volunteer for this again,” Seungcheol sighed.

Then it was Jisoo’s turn to meet up with the guys.

“Hey man, how’re you feeling?” Vernon asked.

“Pretty bad,” Jisoo responded.

“Can we see your bruise? I bet it’s nasty.” Soonyoung asked with a laugh.

“Sure,” Jisoo replied, lifting his hoodie up so they could all see the welt on his stomach. It _was_ nasty.

“Well,” Soonyoung started, “I’m starving. Let’s eat.”

“How can you say that after seeing Jisoo’s nasty-ass bruise?” Wonwoo asked (with Jisoo a little offended after being referred to as “nasty-ass”).

“I’m legit starving,” Soonyoung said with a pained face, hand on his stomach for effect.

“I’ve been buying you rink food all day long, how do you have such an appetite?” Seungcheol asked.

“I’m hungry for something that wasn’t cooked in a microwave,” Soonyoung groaned.

“Fair,” Seungcheol responded. “Where are the others? Let’s all get dinner together.”

“Weren’t they watching the game? They’re probably still in the stands recovering from how bad it was,” Wonwoo said.

Seungcheol threw him a look, but decided to go back to the sheet they were just playing on to retrieve them.

And once they were all together (now with Jihoon as well, who was in the lobby already, just avoiding the team) they decided to go grab some food at a local restaurant before heading back. The younger guys couldn’t decide where to eat, so Seungcheol chose the nearest place for them. It happened to be some shit diner Wonwoo claimed gave him bad flashbacks, but he and the rest of the guys made it out just okay. And Seungcheol paid for their meals, which made their food taste slightly better.

 

After their dinner at Denny’s (of all places), Seungcheol dropped Jihoon off at his apartment. Seungcheol placed Jihoon’s bag in the corner and said, “Well, I guess you didn’t even need this stuff.” After a completely silent car ride, saying something now felt so out of place.

“Mmm,” Jihoon mumbled.

“Sorry you had to come all that way just to sit on the bench. You know if I was coaching you would have been out there, right?”

“Mmhm.”

After a brief pause, Seungcheol confessed, “I saw you watching my game,” looking up at Jihoon from where his face was downturned in the doorway.

Jihoon just stared at him.

“Does that mean, you, y’know?” Seungcheol started.

Jihoon continued to stare at him with an unwavering expression.

“Are we…?”

Nothing.

“Work with me here!” Seungcheol exclaimed, exasperated.

“Just ask me out,” Jihoon said.

“What?”

“Just ask me on a fucking date already.”

“Oh,” Seungcheol exhaled. “So, are you free Monday night? Around 7?”

“No.”

“O-kay, how ‘bout Thursday?”

“No.”

“Dude.”

“Just pick me up tomorrow at 8.”

“Okay, cool,” Seungcheol smiled, relief on his face. “So, have a good night, and I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

Jihoon didn’t say anything back, but before he closed the door, Seungcheol could see the faintest smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this didnt feature the whole team  
> im still trying to remember how to write everyone
> 
> i hope u enjoyed my attempt at making the gays happen tho  
> and thats all we can really ask for  
> yay for jihoon for wanting to work it out (talking to the cat made him realize his mistake)
> 
> wonwoo voice: fuck the approved playlist

**Author's Note:**

> okay yeah so that was kinda messy but i tried to just introduce some people and set the stage for more shenanigans to come
> 
> i hope to do diff members perspectives for diff chapters but the beginning is chans bc we are learning with him
> 
> sorry for the weird terms  
> just go along with it if u dont know what they are


End file.
